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Thread: How bad is transphobia? How many people really feel so hateful?

  1. #1

    Default How bad is transphobia? How many people really feel so hateful?

    How many people are really so awful? Why don't people want to be better and nicer? Why are they content to just be mean and hateful? How do they not feel bad about it? How many people are really like this? 25% of people? 75%? I know, lots of questions. I like to hope there aren't that many terrible people... but I dunno. It's depressing.

    Online, you see a lot of transgender hate on certain sites. but how much of it is real? How much of it isn't real hate, but just stupid trolling by otherwise good people? It still sometimes ends up coming off as hurtful or depressing to someone who doesn't realize the words are just a stupid joke.
    Last edited by ShippoFox; 01-Jun-2013 at 01:46.

  2. #2

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    Quote Originally Posted by ShippoFox View Post
    How many people are really so awful? Why don't people want to be better and nicer? Why are they content to just be mean and hateful? How do they not feel bad about it? How many people are really like this? 25% of people? 75%? I know, lots of questions. I like to hope there aren't that many terrible people... but I dunno. It's depressing.

    Online, you see a lot of transgender hate on certain sites. but how much of it is real? How much of it isn't real hate, but just stupid trolling by otherwise good people? It still sometimes ends up coming off as hurtful or depressing to someone who doesn't realize the words are just a stupid joke.
    Not being transgendered myself, or having a personal interest in doing so, I don't have good information, but I do know how cruel people can be. Often it's caused by ignorance, or worse, stupidity. Unfortunately, there are violent people in our society, or people who harbor violent thoughts. They are self-centered and self serving. Sometimes they are frustrated with their job, lack of money, have problems paying their bills, or have relationship problems. It becomes easy for these people to find a wide variety of scape goats. Often those people are the ones they can't understand. I'm in that category on two plains. In college, I lived as openly gay, though I didn't draw attention to myself. I simply had a boyfriend that everyone knew about. And of course the other is wearing diapers. That I don't advertise, but I don't because I know these same people that you are talking about would openly hate me, and show it in a variety of ways.

    People like myself would like to make the world a safer place for all those who are different, but we don't have that power. We can only change a society, one person at a time, and that can take forever.

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    Not being transgendered myself, or having a personal interest in doing so, I don't have good information, but I do know how cruel people can be. Often it's caused by ignorance, or worse, stupidity. Unfortunately, there are violent people in our society, or people who harbor violent thoughts. They are self-centered and self serving. Sometimes they are frustrated with their job, lack of money, have problems paying their bills, or have relationship problems. It becomes easy for these people to find a wide variety of scape goats. Often those people are the ones they can't understand. I'm in that category on two plains. In college, I lived as openly gay, though I didn't draw attention to myself. I simply had a boyfriend that everyone knew about. And of course the other is wearing diapers. That I don't advertise, but I don't because I know these same people that you are talking about would openly hate me, and show it in a variety of ways.

    People like myself would like to make the world a safer place for all those who are different, but we don't have that power. We can only change a society, one person at a time, and that can take forever.
    well, you sure make this ol-girl feel safe and wanted, DogBoy....
    (Big-Kiss & a sweet smile for your efforts...)

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    Not being transgendered myself, or having a personal interest in doing so, I don't have good information, but I do know how cruel people can be. Often it's caused by ignorance, or worse, stupidity. Unfortunately, there are violent people in our society, or people who harbor violent thoughts. They are self-centered and self serving. Sometimes they are frustrated with their job, lack of money, have problems paying their bills, or have relationship problems. It becomes easy for these people to find a wide variety of scape goats. Often those people are the ones they can't understand.
    I think you're exactly right on this. It's called a phobia for a reason; hate often comes from fear, and fear comes from lack of understanding (unless there's a threat of some kind, which I don't see in the case of transphobia). I honestly think a lot of it comes down to misunderstanding. People don't understand why someone could want to change genders, or not fully identify with their birth sex. They often think it's related to homosexuality, which they already fear for a number of (silly) reasons. And out of misunderstanding comes hate. Being trans gets written off as a sickness, or a type of depravity. People can't relate to what it's like, so they judge, and hate is the result.

    I was really saddened by an example of this recently. A few months ago at my church, our pastor was in the middle of the sermon. He never preaches about political issues, which is something I appreciate very much - church shouldn't be about worldly politics. But on this day, he paused the message to give a five-minute rant about homosexuality and transgender. He equated the two, claimed they were responsible for society's decline, and tore into a school in Massachusetts that let's male-to-female children use the girls' washroom. Then he went right back to the message. Since then, I've felt a bit out-of-place at church, as someone who's not entirely male. I don't feel that God has a problem with who I am (the Bible has nothing I can think of against changing one's gender expression), but people clearly would if they knew. They assume that because it's different, it's wrong. And really, that's what a lot of prejudice comes down to. It's not normal, so it's wrong.

    So yes, I think transphobia is real. I don't know how common it is, and I'd speculate that it's getting less common as awareness increases, but it is there. It's a sad reminder that those of us who don't fit the mould need to be careful...

  5. #5

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    I'd also say it's kind of based by a simple case of not understanding what this is. This lead's to fear, a fear about the unknown, which some people cannot sort into a certain corner, so it ends up hated, insulting this in general, so also the people; stereotypical thinking...

    And the last is anyway kinda common in our society, sadly.

    I'm not TG myself, but got to know a lot of people, over the last years. And a lot I like to call friends, so I'm thinking about this anyway, sometimes.
    So... I like to think of it as a kind of primeval fear, especially for men. Since, well you know... I guess, so they simply fear ending up with a "false" woman, in their mind.
    Which develops simply out of their unawareness and is wrong of course. But they don't know better.
    And what do some people tend to do if they cannot control a thing, but fear it like crazy? They boast! Senselessly and out of ignorance. I can understand it from this point.
    However, ultimately they're stuck by theirselves.

    I think, hopefully, over time this hate will diminish, as it is to some degree already and as it has been already with the homosexuel community.
    Although a minority remains, but no one said that you have to respect them!


    Furthermore:


    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    We can only change a society, one person at a time, and that can take forever.
    Just as a quick reminder: You can't change other people. You can only change yourself...
    Not all people will listen, if they don't want to change, they will not simply. They can be forced to some degree to accept things by our social standards, but in the end, they won't change.
    And honestly, I think, at some point it's more than enough. You can help, you can tell them the right thing to do, but if nothing changes... let them drown in their ignorance, period.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by ShippoFox View Post
    Online, you see a lot of transgender hate on certain sites. but how much of it is real? How much of it isn't real hate, but just stupid trolling by otherwise good people? It still sometimes ends up coming off as hurtful or depressing to someone who doesn't realize the words are just a stupid joke.
    People can be nice. In fact, most people are generally nice in their day-to-day lives. But given the opportunity, say - on the internet - to voice themselves anonymously, they quickly turn into hate-mongering assholes.

    The internet is a hate machine, so I try not to take anything to heart.

  7. #7

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    This is going to be quite blunt but I hope not unkind. I do not care if people are transgendered, hell, I'm in no position to judge considering I have a fetish that most of us on this site also do. However, for people who are 'normal' or rather, vanilla, as I hate the term normal, they will not perceive transgenderism the way you or I would. They likely see it as rather alien or perhaps threatening; the idea that a guy would want to change his actually gender probably gives them a deep sense of discomfort, it does for me, but I would not bully someone for wanting to do so. Furthermore, a lot of what people say online is bullshit, they may be spewing their bile just to fit in, it's the nature of the beast that is group mentality. Anyway just my two monopoly pounds.

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by Oateson View Post
    People can be nice. In fact, most people are generally nice in their day-to-day lives. But given the opportunity, say - on the internet - to voice themselves anonymously, they quickly turn into hate-mongering assholes.

    The internet is a hate machine, so I try not to take anything to heart.

    I call it being a coward. If you are not willing to say it in real life, it's a cowardly move to say it online.

  9. #9

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    It's hard to have faith in humanity. It's hard to not be depressed.
    There really are still a lot of nice people though, right?
    Does anyone have a clue of how many people might be transphobic and not? Like polls or something? I dunno.



    Quote Originally Posted by Oateson View Post
    People can be nice. In fact, most people are generally nice in their day-to-day lives. But given the opportunity, say - on the internet - to voice themselves anonymously, they quickly turn into hate-mongering assholes.

    The internet is a hate machine, so I try not to take anything to heart.
    This is what I was thinking too. A lot of the time, people say things they don't even mean, just to start some dumb drama. I actually saw some people admit it.

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by Calico View Post
    I call it being a coward. If you are not willing to say it in real life, it's a cowardly move to say it online.
    Yes, but consider:



    Quote Originally Posted by ShippoFox View Post
    A lot of the time, people say things they don't even mean, just to start some dumb drama. I actually saw some people admit it.


    It's all opportunism.

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