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Thread: New to DL- HELP

  1. #1

    Default New to DL- HELP

    Hello! So my boyfriend always hinted to me that he was into me acting "bigger" than him. I very recently found out the extent of it. He told me he is into diapers and babbysitters. I'm all for trying it out as I myself am into (no offense) weird things. The only problem is, before he told me about his fetish, I had no idea AB/DL was even a thing. I have absolutley no idea how to go about age play. He asks me to speak to him as a babbysitter would, to speak down at him, make him feel small/ inferior, etc. Please help! I have no idea how to go about doing that. If anyone could give me some pointers (and a few specific examples of things to say/do) that would be greatly appreciated!

  2. #2

    Default

    Hi Lorraine and welcome to the site. Your boyfriend may be pushing things a little fast and furiously, but if you're game, good for you. You might want to do a little reading up, looking up infantilism on Wikipedia, and sites like When Teens Like diapers, etc. In most cases, it is a fetish, where diapers or other baby objects are the gateway objects to regression. Regression is a mental process that involves fantasizing, making the person feel like they are either a toddler or a baby. Some members on this site say they enjoy diapers, or pacifiers, some similar object as a means of finding a peaceful state, much like that of a baby or toddler, trying to recapture that feeling of innocence as well as dependency on a parent or caregiver.

    That sounds like the case of your boyfriend. There is a spectrum to our desires, much like the Autistic spectrum, where there are varying intensities to our desires. Some members here are content to just wear diapers, and some, at a further spectrum, enjoy using their diapers, and find sexual gratification because of it.

    To answer your question, your role would be as a caregiver, a mother, or as he has suggested, a babysitter. Either way, just imagine taking care of a two year old, talking to him in baby talk, playing with him, with childish toys, like blocks or Duplos. One could take it further with feedings, and diaper changing. The spectrum is a wide one.

    There is a book on Amazon called, "There's a Baby In My Bed" and it would probably answer all your questions. I hope that helps, and thanks for being so accepting of us.

  3. #3
    H0TWH33LS

    Default New to DL- HELP

    You sound like a very accepting girlfriend, your boyfriend is very fortunate. I can relate to his "fantasy" and I'd say that he is mostly just seeking dominance especially in the form of humiliation. Typically babysitters are the ones that boss kids around and get "special instructions" from parents regarding the rules of the house. Instead of acting like a mother you can talk down to him as if you are more closer in age. I think the "climax" of the fantasy is definitely bedtime so you can play up the fact that he needs to wear pull-ups or diapers because he is a naughty little one. Have fun with it and don't be afraid to have the conversation with your boyfriend, I'm sure he'd love to explain in more detail.

  4. #4

    Default

    Welcome to ADISC Loraine.

    I agree with dogboy that your boyfriend might be taking things a little fast here, but then if you are good with it who am I to say anything.

    Your boyfriends request could be a bit tricky. He asks you to take the role of a babysitter yet some of the other things you mention are not necessarily consistent with how a babysitter would treat a child. So he has some specific ideas and it will be important for both of you to communicate openly to further understanding of the fantasy.

    Giving you specifics will also be very difficult as none of us really know what he has on his mind. So if I were you I would rely those open conversations the I would explore while noting his reactions, then make adjustments as necessary.

    A good guideline of what to expect would be as simple as considering the interaction between a babysitter and a young child.

    You also mentioned that you like to explore weird things. You could also try spending some baby time yourself. This will also further give you a point if reference that you can work from.

    Some of the things you are going to want to know:

    • What are the limits? Consider this from both your perspective and his. For example, you choose to use some discipline but he is not willing to allow this, or not willing to allow things beyond a certain point.
    • What will he do, what will you do? Like will diapers be involved, and will you control when and how he uses them?
    • What is the safe word? This might be important because his fantasy seems to border on BDSM so any venture into this realm should include an agreed upon way to say NO MORE PLEASE.


    Both of you need to clearly communicate what you are interesting in doing, getting out if this and what you are not willing to do.

    The only thing that is left is to treat him like a baby and to have fun yourself. Enjoy the experience because it sounds like he either has a very special baby side to him, or a kinky side.

  5. #5

    Default Re: New to DL- HELP

    Firstly, what you're doing for him is AWESOME and you have no idea how much he appreciates (or will appreciate) this. As for tips what he'd like, I'll tell you some things that I'd like (it sounds like he's similar to me in these regards). Only do things you're comfortable with, obviously.

    talk to him like you're talking to a baby or toddler / little kid. Use that baby talk voice that women to to them. It'all make him feel little.

    * If he's wearing diapers, make sure you bring them up, asking if he's wet or needs a change (even if you're not changing him or if he's he's not "using" them with you around.) Performing diaper checks adds a lot too. Basically, the more you remind him how much a baby he is, the more he'll feel that you don't mind (or even enjoy?) Doing it to make him happy.

    * Here's a big point (especially because he said he likes you being "bigger" than him): BE IN CHARGE. Act like he doesn't have a choice. If you're the babysitter (or mommy, whatever) he should listen to you. When you actually do this stuff with him, try to beat the awkward moment of starting it. Don't ask him if he'd like to start, TELL him it's time to start. If he's going to be wearing diapers, say something like, "Why aren't you wearing your diapers? You know underwear is for big boys!" Or "we have to get baby [insert name here] in his diapees before he makes a mess in his pants!" I know this probably sounds stupid, but it sounds like he enjoys a little bit of being submissive while doing these things.

    * if it's possible, feeding him a bottle filled with anything can be a good thing to do for you two (not right away, though). With your embracing of him while doing it, he'll feel very loved, safe, and taken care of. I think it's also a pretty easy thing for you to do as well.

    I hope of these tips help. Don't be afraid of being creative or doing something randomly. Rule of thumb, just imagine playing/ taking care of a real baby/toddler. What would you do or say?

    Once again, I think it's sweet of you to do this for him and I hope it goes well. Who knows, you may even enjoy doing it!

  6. #6

    Default

    Very easy have you ever baby sat any one well its the same did you play house then hes your baby doll .play coloring books . You just will learn as you go along you just need to be honest with your likes and dislikes .
    It,s just you need to be ok with what your doing too.look at 15 stone baby,s some one give you a link to it.
    What age is him we all like an age we like it helps. Have him show you the storys on here he in into that may
    Help to. Good luck

  7. #7

    Default

    Ah Lorraine, it's been five days. What's happened between us? Yes, you came onto this site all excited, wondering what you should do with your boyfriend, and so many of us responded. But where have you gone, and what did you do with your boyfriend? The world turns, but I feel jilted!!!

  8. #8

    Default

    Haha I'm happy your so interested! It's been going well. Thanks for all the wonderful tips! I'm really eager to try out this age play thing but he's really insecure about it and thinks my eagerness isn't genuine. I guess he's a little emberassed by it. We're taking it slow and just doing more of the talking side of it right now but I plan on getting completely into it for his valentines day present. I think held really like it. Thanks again! And I do have to admit that I find this all exciting and even enjoyable...

  9. #9
    H0TWH33LS

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Rocky View Post
    Firstly, what you're doing for him is AWESOME and you have no idea how much he appreciates (or will appreciate) this. As for tips what he'd like, I'll tell you some things that I'd like (it sounds like he's similar to me in these regards). Only do things you're comfortable with, obviously.

    • talk to him like you're talking to a baby or toddler / little kid. Use that baby talk voice that women to to them. It'all make him feel little.

    * If he's wearing diapers, make sure you bring them up, asking if he's wet or needs a change (even if you're not changing him or if he's he's not "using" them with you around.) Performing diaper checks adds a lot too. Basically, the more you remind him how much a baby he is, the more he'll feel that you don't mind (or even enjoy?) Doing it to make him happy.

    * Here's a big point (especially because he said he likes you being "bigger" than him): BE IN CHARGE. Act like he doesn't have a choice. If you're the babysitter (or mommy, whatever) he should listen to you. When you actually do this stuff with him, try to beat the awkward moment of starting it. Don't ask him if he'd like to start, TELL him it's time to start. If he's going to be wearing diapers, say something like, "Why aren't you wearing your diapers? You know underwear is for big boys!" Or "we have to get baby [insert name here] in his diapees before he makes a mess in his pants!" I know this probably sounds stupid, but it sounds like he enjoys a little bit of being submissive while doing these things.

    * if it's possible, feeding him a bottle filled with anything can be a good thing to do for you two (not right away, though). With your embracing of him while doing it, he'll feel very loved, safe, and taken care of. I think it's also a pretty easy thing for you to do as well.

    I hope of these tips help. Don't be afraid of being creative or doing something randomly. Rule of thumb, just imagine playing/ taking care of a real baby/toddler. What would you do or say?

    Once again, I think it's sweet of you to do this for him and I hope it goes well. Who knows, you may even enjoy doing it!
    This is GREAT advice @rocky. I can especially agree with the "BE IN CHARGE" at least that is what I would like most from someone in this role. I love the idea of feeding him a bottle and also suggest that eye contact can bridge an amazing connection between you both. Have you considered a feeding scenario? If he seems to be going along with everything I would suggest feeding him or at the very least cutting up his food into "baby bites" for him whether he likes it or not . I think the more confident you are in the authoritative role than the more comfortable he will be and therefore make everything go smoothly. Some other suggestions I could add might be:

    -Enforce a bedtime for him and stick to it! This would be helpful because it creates a routine for him and will get him on a more regular sleeping schedule. It could be fun to reward him and allow him to stay up late some nights but use this at your discretion.

    -If you are comfortable you could enforce bath time which might be fun for your boyfriend since he'll get to play in the tub. Also this ensures that your little one is always clean

    -Give him a list of chores to do and if he fails to complete them than you could punish him by spanking or enforcing an earlier bedtime.

    These are just a few to come to mind...

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