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Thread: Telling masseuse?

  1. #1

    Default Telling masseuse?

    Yes, I know, another massage thread.

    The ethical merits of this have been debated ad nauseum on this board, so I don't really need assistance on that. What I do need is assistance on if/how/when to inform ones masseuse when getting a massage.

    I've had two experiences.
    1) attempted to make appointment in advance and informed salon that I must wear protection for medical reason. They were nice but declined the appointment saying they were sorry about my situation but unable to accept my business.

    2) second time was at a resort and didn't inform, went into treatment room in my robe (provided by spa), she asked me to remove clothing while she left the room. I stripped to diaper and got under sheet. She came back and massage proceeded in a normal, non-sexual way.

    ....So what is the best play moving forward now that I'm back home and need a new establishment to get some acute back pain worked on?

  2. #2

    Default Telling masseuse?



    Quote Originally Posted by JamesHurn View Post
    Yes, I know, another massage thread.

    The ethical merits of this have been debated ad nauseum on this board, so I don't really need assistance on that. What I do need is assistance on if/how/when to inform ones masseuse when getting a massage.

    I've had two experiences.
    1) attempted to make appointment in advance and informed salon that I must wear protection for medical reason. They were nice but declined the appointment saying they were sorry about my situation but unable to accept my business.

    2) second time was at a resort and didn't inform, went into treatment room in my robe (provided by spa), she asked me to remove clothing while she left the room. I stripped to diaper and got under sheet. She came back and massage proceeded in a normal, non-sexual way.

    ....So what is the best play moving forward now that I'm back home and need a new establishment to get some acute back pain worked on?
    Do you have a medical need for diapers? From your profile it looks like you don't (apologies if I'm wrong), in which case I'd suggest not wearing for the actual massage.

    Otherwise I've always left my underwear on when I've gotten a massage. Unless you need your glutes/low back worked on I don't see why you couldn't do the same with a diaper.

    Most massage therapists are professional about stuff like this, so it's unlikely they'd say anything about it if there's an actual need.

  3. #3

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    if you are IC, then wear diapers. Otherwise, you have no physical need, and out of pure courtesy to the masseuse don't wear diapers. While for us it may seem normal, for everyone else, it is quite uncomfortable. If you don't need diapers either; don't get a massage or skip out on wearing diapers for a day.

  4. #4

    Default

    I am not incontinent, but have been wearing diapers most of the time day and night for close to a year now. I still have control most of the time, but do from time to time find that I have to go more often now. I could easily make it through an hour massage without my diaper, but have chosen not to. I go to get my massages for a lower back muscle I've injured and for general relaxatoin.

    When I have a new masseuse, I usually tell them during our 'pre-massage' talk when they ask about problem areas, what type of treatment I want, and the like. None have had a problem and they have all worked around my diaper without issue. The one time I did NOT mention it before hand I got very lucky. That was actually the best masseuse I've had to date. She had no problem working with, around, and through my diaper. She would tuck and pull it down, and massage my gluts over the diaper. Afterwords, she asked how everything was. I told her wonderful, and thanked her for actually working so well with my diaper, as she was the only person to actually touch and work around it. She said she wasn't even sure if or how to mention or ask me about wearing a diaper and that she was glad I broke the ice and even moreso glad she was able to do a good job.

  5. #5

    Default Telling masseuse?

    Whenever I get a massage I usually go to the same place and have to fill out a brief medical questionnaire, makes things kinda easy if I wanted to fib and say I was IC, haven't had the balls to do it yet.

    If that's not something they do, I would just simply advise the masseuse just before you get started. Dealing with the human body and it's intricacies is their job. Considering a diaper covers a part that doesn't traditionally get massaged (I'm assuming this isn't a happy ending kind of place)... Then it shouldn't be a big deal.

    If he/she makes a big deal about it, you have two options, ask for another therapist or simply leave.

    Anybody who has worked in the service field will tell you they will bend over backwards to make the customer happy, especially if it doesn't affect them (since they don't have to touch that area) so I shouldn't foresee it being a problem. They want your money, he/she wants a tip, just a little heads up prior would be considerate enough IMO.

  6. #6

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    I currently need protection at night, and am not willing to take the risk of over-relaxing or falling asleep and having an accident on the table. If I wasn't wearing one, I would be far too nervous and it wouldn't be enjoyable or productive massage.

    I have to admit I'm very hesitant to tell right before the massage starts... It would seem very awkward and uncomfortable if they decided to say no or had a problem with it. On the flip side, telling them in person does allow them to see that I'm a normal person, rather than let their imagination go wild.

    If I decide to go the tell before I show up route, does anyone have any ideas on how to phrase in a manner that will be easy for them to understand and won't come across as creepy?

  7. #7

    Default

    Oh well,

    I know that this has indeed been discussed "ad nauseum" in this and other forums...

    Yet you started another one and I feel inclined to give you some answers... / input:

    Myself, I'm Incontinent... and YES, I get a massage of my back mostly about once or twice a month... I get this through my insurance company for an accident I had years ago which left my back easy to ache and the muscles get overly tense and sore easily... massage helps better than any bit of painkillers.
    so indeed, I do have experience about being incontinent (Read: needs protections) and going to a massage... now here's a few things:

    1) when I go to the massage I either wear pull-ups (Tena Pants) or I wear my mesh-type pants and a incon. pad... AND MOST IMPORTANTLY I WEAR BOXER BRIEFS OVER the pull-ups or pads/mash-panty combo.
    So far this has never been really questioned - as I think it's "obvious" why I wear... but I also find it far more easy on the massage therapist than having to deal (ie. get in touch / see) a proper plastic backed diaper.
    I never had a problem this way... most of the time, it's not even noticeable this way.
    and even if you're incontint and loose serious amounts - your massage will usually not last more than an hour or maybe 90 minutes at MAX... and that's a lot... go to the toilet if you can pee on your own, self-cath if you've got retention problems, whatever.... and put on a FRESH CLEAN pull-up or PAD... PLEASE.
    don't drink coffee / alcoholic beverages / coffeinated stuff / etc... at least for half a day before your massage appointment... and don't drink gallons -but keep hydrated.
    if you're incon, in 95% of the cases (unless there's an overly extreme case) you'll be 100% fine for that hour - you might dribble, loose a bit urine... but you'll not NEED proper diapers or the thickest pants / pads. I guess it's different if you've got bowel IC issues...

    2) IF YOU DO NOT NEED (MEDICAL) DIAPERS - then DO NOT push this unto other persons... it's simply rude....
    for those who don't get this: what's wrong ... just imagine the massage therapist (or whatever) would be your GF / WIFE / MOM / etc... and some bloke feels the need to basically push his fetish "onto" her - even in a mild way - I bet you would not really like that thought.
    There's a limit to everything... and yes, there's a difference in whether you actually have no real CHOICE or if you indeed DO HAVE A CHOICE.
    And again, even if you're IC, you can deal with the situation differently than going in a full-blown thick-as-it-gets plastic diaper without anything to cover it to a massage therapist.


    3) Telling...
    I think if you go to a medical massage therapist / professional massage therapist, you can easily say over the phone that you are slightly incontinent and do wear pads / pull-ups / protection.
    Ask if it's a deal... usually it isn't.
    But AGAIN : WHY FULL-BLOWN DIAPERS... it's not like you're going into deep-sleep and loose all control... you will be awake... maybe dozing a bit - but you'll feel if you get wet... and again, TOILET USE before the massage starts, don't go crazy on fluid-intake and no diuertics.
    ... there's no reason that you'll need anything but a normal / thin pad or a thin pull-up to take care of the slight chance of a minor accident.
    It will make the situation A LOT more comfortable for both: you and the Therapist.

  8. #8

    Smile



    Quote Originally Posted by BabyCorry View Post
    She said she wasn't even sure if or how to mention or ask me about wearing a diaper and that she was glad I broke the ice...
    I think that shows how a masseuse might feel uncomfortable if you don't inform them in advance what you will be wearing.

    Personally, I don't think it would be polite to wear a diaper if you don't need to. Sure, a diaper might make you feel comfortable, but... if someone doesn't understand your motivations, they might assume that you "get off" sexually on exposing your diapers or on making other people feel uncomfortable by exposing them. Or they might just feel uncomfortable at the idea that you could potentially crap yourself at any moment or leak over their expensive massage table.

    If it isn't a "big thing" and getting cheap thrills isn't what you're interested in, then why not go without a diaper? What's the big deal? You could put one on in the toilet after your massage without anyone being any the wiser.

    So... I wouldn't... but if you are going to, I think it's imperative that you're up-front about it and give them the option of declining your business, rather than turning up expectantly and mentioning it at the last minute where they might feel under pressure.

    Hope you have a nice massage, anyway. I could reallly do with one myself! The company I used to work for had someone come in once a week to massage anyone who wanted one. Top perk!

  9. #9

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by JamesHurn View Post
    I currently need protection at night, and am not willing to take the risk of over-relaxing or falling asleep and having an accident on the table. If I wasn't wearing one, I would be far too nervous and it wouldn't be enjoyable or productive massage.

    I have to admit I'm very hesitant to tell right before the massage starts... It would seem very awkward and uncomfortable if they decided to say no or had a problem with it. On the flip side, telling them in person does allow them to see that I'm a normal person, rather than let their imagination go wild.

    If I decide to go the tell before I show up route, does anyone have any ideas on how to phrase in a manner that will be easy for them to understand and won't come across as creepy?
    How about something along the lines of "I have a medical problem with incontinence at night, and am wearing a diaper in case I fall asleep so I don't get your massage table wet." You could also add something about how you wouldn't be able to relax if you weren't wearing it because you'd be worried about an accident.

    I'd say that comes across as considerate, not creepy. Essentially, be honest. Unless they're massaging your glutes (which can be both awesome and painful at the same time, btw), there's no need for them to go near the diaper.

    You'll probably have more luck (and a better massage, to be honest) at a place that focuses more on therapeutic massage rather than relaxation massage.

    edit: the other comments about wearing lighter protection are also very good.

  10. #10

    Default

    I'm not really comfortable wearing super light protection. I've found those products have a tendency to leak, especially when lying down. I agree that there isn't a need to wear something ultra thick, but I don't really think a masseuse will have a problem with a "protection using client" because of the thickness of their protection.

    I will take the advice about wearing underwear overtop the diaper to limit uncomfortableness.

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