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Thread: Need to let this out

  1. #1

    Default Need to let this out

    I'm glad i belong to this website im thankful for all the helpful people on here but i wanna open up about what happened in my past i have not told many people about this but here it is my mom dated a guy for 14 years and i was scard of him he would always yell at me all the time he made me feel intimidated and i still have that fear in me today and it wont see to go away

  2. #2

    Default Re: Need to let this out

    Are they still dating?

  3. #3

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    Nope he pasted away in January 2011 but i still feel fear i don't know why

  4. #4
    Countdown

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    by "yell at you," do you mean "zack, youre a horrible waste of space!!! " or "young man, go do the dishes, they're dirty and stink... & they been pilin up for the past few days, yuck... "???

    1st = verbal abuse, 2nd = normal father-son interactions

  5. #5

  6. #6

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    It sounds like you've been traumatized by his abusive nature. There are so many people who have experienced, and it affects their sense of self worth. Often they seek counseling or therapy. This can be very difficult to overcome by oneself, so you might want to seek some professional help. Don't let this man continue to harm you.

  7. #7

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    He passed away in January 2011 and i went to therapy it just still scares me and i still fear all the yelling he did at me and stuff

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by zackiepooh1992 View Post
    He passed away in January 2011 and i went to therapy it just still scares me and i still fear all the yelling he did at me and stuff
    But he's dead and buried, correct? Perhaps what you mean is you fear others who have the same kind of abusive nature? Others who are like your mom's dead boyfriend? (or spouse?) If that's the case, you've generalized your fear to go beyond this individual. I would strongly suggest that you continue therapy in order to confront and allay that fear because at some point in the future you might run into another verbally abusive individual and it's always good to be prepared.

  9. #9

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    I understand what you feel. My father was verbally abusive and yelled a lot, and I still have a fear of him even though I know he cannot hurt me anymore. The best medicine is a good support network and time. It's been many years since my father was a threat to me, yet occasionally I still experience a bough of fear or panic that he might be able to harm me. Sometimes we just have to learn how to cope with these things, or if they become too severe, we have to seek medical or professional help. I spent and still spend a lot of time talking about my (past) issues with friends and family to keep a good cap and level on my emotions. I think it's the best medicine, working through your feelings with a trusted person and just giving it plenty of time and thought. You're going to be okay, you must remember that. No matter how bad it gets, you can only go down so far before you hit bottom and you begin to bounce back up again.

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by zackiepooh1992 View Post
    He passed away in January 2011 and i went to therapy it just still scares me and i still fear all the yelling he did at me and stuff
    he put you through a traumatic stressful experience, and you are now experiencing Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. PTSD

    most people with ptsd will go to therapy, possibly for years, possibly for the rest of their life, just until the time that they feel better enough to live a life happily,

    often they are perscribed drugs to help them with their issues as well,

    this is about the only recourse modern medicine has for you, doctors will not have any alternatives then that for you,


    but it is my opinion that an even better alternative would be meditation, no joke, meditation can do wonders, but of course not after doing it for ten minutes the first time ever and never again, like anything practice makes perfect, you have to do it often, whenever you get a chance, and for as much time as you can,


    i have used this in my life many many times for many many reasons, it always helps and has on occasion amazed me at what it accomplished.

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