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Thread: Life's rough right now..

  1. #1

    Unhappy Life's rough right now..

    Okay so I'm going to explain a bit of my situation, and I'm sorry if this doesn't belong here I just need to vent.

    About 3 months ago my mom decided to buy a farm, and move out to the country. I had to decide to move with her to a place where I'd have no friend's, and really no way to make money. So I decided to convince her to let me get my own apartment so I could stay here with all my friend's.

    I thought I'd be able to handle any problem I could face while living on my own, but then in the first month of being there I fell off a moped broke my wrist. Had to go through 2 surgeries to get it fixed. That on it's own just sucked, and not really having anyone there to help me with things didn't make me feel any better.

    By the end of the first month being on my own, I felt so depressed and just wanted to have everything return to normal. I miss my mom, my dog's, and I miss my home. It's been 2 month's since then, and I'm having an even harder time now. All the stress of my surgeries, being alone, missing my mom, and the stress of paying bill's has brought 2 things up.

    One my bed wetting has gotten so much worse. On a very good week I'm lucky to be dry 3/7 nights of the week. That's not as bad as the other thing that's come up though. As of a month or so ago I started having trouble getting to the bathroom in time, which is one of the most frustrating things I've dealt with.

    I just don't know if things can get any worse honestly. Each day is just a struggle and I feel like it's beginning to be to much. I mean I'm only 17 I shouldn't even be moved out, and dealing with any of this. I'm just so sad, alone, and hate living this way...If anyone has any advice about coping with being away from parent's, or home, please say it, it would be greatly appreciated.

  2. #2
    Cherub

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    I was on my own at age 17. Although I didn't have any bed wetting incidents nor a broken wrist I can identify with the feeling depressed and alone part. Once I realized I had become accustomed to the usual around the house noises made by other people, it became much easier to adjust. If you lived among others and them get a place of your own,,,,it does take time to adjust to being alone.

    For me, it took several months, but eventually I got used to it and eventually came to prefer it.

    As far as bills and job goes, THAT scared me more than anything. I understood the income part really quick. It's simple, don't spend more than you make. I had a credit card, but used it sparingly and ONLY when I knew I could pay it off. I lived on a cash only rule for a LONG time. In a way it felt like rock climbing with out a safety rope to catch you. Eventually I got used to having to pay bills and such. For example, I had my cable turn off (voluntarily) during the summer, and had it turn back on during the winter.

  3. #3

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    Hi. I read your thread about being hypnotized to we the bed and how excited you were that it seemed to be working. What ever happened with that? Are you wetting the bed now but you don't want to any more?

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by GhostRider View Post
    Hi. I read your thread about being hypnotized to we the bed and how excited you were that it seemed to be working. What ever happened with that? Are you wetting the bed now but you don't want to any more?
    That worked but never really well it just made me wet occasionally and I stopped that awhile back. And wetting the bed isn't that bad, it's just starting to interfere with friend's. It's starting to suck that I have to wear at every sleep over or risk wetting the bed.

    and trust me if anyone ever wishes they want to start bed wetting, and having accidents like I used to when I was 14, you don't. It really does suck, you worry ALL the time. I'm constantly in fear of not being around a bathroom because just in case I have an accident. Wearing 24/7 solves this but I hate wearing all the time, it takes every bit of fun out of the experience for me.

    I just hope in a month or 2 this all goes away, it's wearing me out..
    Last edited by jter42; 13-Nov-2012 at 04:18. Reason: typo's

  5. #5

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    I'm on my own right now, at 18. Nasty divorce between my parents, and my mom can barely afford to live on her own, so I moved out.
    It's difficult at first, but you kind of get used to it.

    Also, as a side note, most parents won't mind a phone call every once in a while. If you get overly lonely, give your mom a call.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by ZakRoo View Post
    I'm on my own right now, at 18. Nasty divorce between my parents, and my mom can barely afford to live on her own, so I moved out.
    It's difficult at first, but you kind of get used to it.

    Also, as a side note, most parents won't mind a phone call every once in a while. If you get overly lonely, give your mom a call.
    Yea I'm kind of getting used to nobody being around, I just hate it. I guess I'd have to move out eventually anyway.

    I always give my mom a call almost every night. Help's me feel a little better..

    Sorry about the divorce by the way, my parents separated when I was 2 I never really knew my dad well..

  7. #7
    H0TWH33LS

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    What really sucks is when your first true love breaks up with you and deletes you from facebook presumably because you confessed your biggest secret to her. At the same time imagine not having parents to turn to because they're too wrapped up in their tennis playing, landscaping, and dinner party suburban lives. I think it is tough times like this that really test us and help make us stronger.

  8. #8

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    Jter42,

    I moved out and lived on my own when I was like 16.... don't get me wrong my parents were great, supportive and everything, still for a few very personal reasons I was basically forced to move out at that time...

    Don't get all worked up... it will get better, it may take some time to adjust.,...
    about your day-time wetting - stress can be a huge factor...

    Make out with friends if possible, visit your family when you can, get something new like join a sports club, or whatever.... I mean - get out and do stuff...
    it'll help to take your mind of and keep your from spiraling down.
    You'll make it... walk through this, I know you can, I know you can make it... and you'll come out stronger at the end of that road.
    it's all experience... and you're in a new situation, "alone", with an accident, probably feeling a bit "helpless" and "overwhelmed".
    But as time passes on, you'll see that you can manage, and it will become OK.
    hang in there... and good luck!

    On a side note: your day-time IC issues: it's VERY rare for a healthy 17 year old to develop Incontinence Problems without ANY medical background.
    Sure stress / psychology can be a major contributor here... but none the less you may consider seeing an urologist about this... if you for example suffer from an overactive bladder, there's a lot you can do... same goes with many other IC forms, resorting to wearing 24/7 is a "worst case scenario" imho... also try pads or anything less noticeable than a proper diaper. it'll make you feel a bit better.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by EPO1 View Post
    Jter42,

    I moved out and lived on my own when I was like 16.... don't get me wrong my parents were great, supportive and everything, still for a few very personal reasons I was basically forced to move out at that time...

    Don't get all worked up... it will get better, it may take some time to adjust.,...
    about your day-time wetting - stress can be a huge factor...

    Make out with friends if possible, visit your family when you can, get something new like join a sports club, or whatever.... I mean - get out and do stuff...
    it'll help to take your mind of and keep your from spiraling down.
    You'll make it... walk through this, I know you can, I know you can make it... and you'll come out stronger at the end of that road.
    it's all experience... and you're in a new situation, "alone", with an accident, probably feeling a bit "helpless" and "overwhelmed".
    But as time passes on, you'll see that you can manage, and it will become OK.
    hang in there... and good luck!

    On a side note: your day-time IC issues: it's VERY rare for a healthy 17 year old to develop Incontinence Problems without ANY medical background.
    Sure stress / psychology can be a major contributor here... but none the less you may consider seeing an urologist about this... if you for example suffer from an overactive bladder, there's a lot you can do... same goes with many other IC forms, resorting to wearing 24/7 is a "worst case scenario" imho... also try pads or anything less noticeable than a proper diaper. it'll make you feel a bit better.
    Thank's for the advice. I just hope I start adjusting sooner rather than later. I'm definitely going to be joining the lacrosse team in a week or 2 to help get my mind off all this. Plus in lacrosse I can let some steam out on other players so that might help some . I'm going to start getting out of the house more as well, staying cooped up all day probably isn't to good for me.

    And I'm going to be telling my mom what's going on if it doesn't stop in 2 weeks or so. I just think the doctors going to say that it's most likely stress and anxiety related, and will go away with time. I want to kind of avoid all the tests, and embarrassment until it's apparent this problem isn't going away ya know?

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by jter42 View Post
    Thank's for the advice. I just hope I start adjusting sooner rather than later. I'm definitely going to be joining the lacrosse team in a week or 2 to help get my mind off all this. Plus in lacrosse I can let some steam out on other players so that might help some . I'm going to start getting out of the house more as well, staying cooped up all day probably isn't to good for me.

    And I'm going to be telling my mom what's going on if it doesn't stop in 2 weeks or so. I just think the doctors going to say that it's most likely stress and anxiety related, and will go away with time. I want to kind of avoid all the tests, and embarrassment until it's apparent this problem isn't going away ya know?
    Two things:
    1) There is NO NEED, none at all, to be embarrassed about in front of a medical professional... trust me they are professionals (and bound to keep it confident by law).
    2) avoiding the tests: .. .well bad idea... the tests aren't that evil... you'll survive them.. also a proper urologist will NOT shrug this as stress only off,... the thing is this at 17, when you'r generally healthy, stress should not make you incontinent on it's own... it simply should not (well it's not unheard of, and it certainly affects the problem)... but there could be an underlying medical issue... also it's far easier if for example you have a very overactive bladder, to treat this (meds) early on, as when this has gone on for a longer time... so don't wait....

    Don't know if you had a previous history of bedwetting and incontinence... but especially if you did not, a doc visit is a must.
    if you had previous issues with bedwetting, then yes, stress (if that was amongst it's original triggers) *COULD* maybe a reason for your bedwetting all over again...

    The IC on the other hand - developing IC issues for stress only, especially at your age is rather uncommon...

    now if you go to an urologist and all the tests reveal nothing, ask him/her about the possibility of this being a psychological issue... if the doc thinks so, have her/him recommend a good well renown psychologist. (trust me a "shirnk" doesn't bite)....
    It's worth going to therapy if anxiety and stress are pushing you physically as far as being incontinent.
    Therapy isn't evil or nasty... actually it can really be interesting and help you to understand a problem/situation and help you by learning how to better deal with it.


    joining the lacrosse team and stuff like that is a great idea!
    it'll keep you active and take the edge of the situation easily...

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