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Thread: Why Not to Be Ashamed or Angry.

  1. #1

    Default Why Not to Be Ashamed or Angry.

    Now, this fits in almost any thread, so I posted it here. If anyone thinks it fits better elsewhere, then by all means move it. After my last big post, which albeit, was a bit scary, I thought I’d make one a bit happier.

    Why not to be ashamed, embarrassed, or angry at your TB, AB, BF, DL, DF, LB, LG, Sissy, or anything else.

    I’m going to start generally, go into each specific part of us (fetish just seems to have a dirty and sometimes negative connotation to it, so I’ll be replacing it with “part of us,”) and why we should accept it and be ok with it.

    For those who have accepted your part, I hope I am preaching to the choir. For those of you who are struggling with accepting yourself, this is for you. After all, it is part of you, hence why I used the word “yourself” instead of “accepting that fetish.” First off, I understand that they’re exceptions, but I consider them exceptions that prove the rule, but you can’t stop liking something, or being something. I can’t stop being gay (despite what multiple large groups of people (I’m talking to you Exodus) believe, but I digress). I can’t stop being a TB or a DL or a Furry or anything else. It’s just not going to happen. The same goes for you (well, most of you). As my mother said when I admitted to being a TB/DL, “as long as you’re not hurting anyone, including yourself, what you do behind closed doors is your own business.”

    TB’s/AB’s (LB’s and LG’s included)
    Now, we’re very plentiful on the site, so I know there’s multitudes of examples of people who have no problem accepting the way they are, and that’s great! However, there are people who don’t accept themselves, and that’s by no means great. I know everyone has their own theories for what causes this part of us that wants to be a baby again, but for me it was a cocktail of being forced to grow up too fast and a few traumatic experiences, and maybe things I’m not even aware of. This isn’t my fault, and whatever you think caused you to be a TB or an AB isn’t your fault either. Would you blame yourself for having a certain color hair? Or for liking frisbee over soccer? I know most people wouldn’t. So why blame yourself or get mad at yourself for another thing that you can’t control? Besides, you’re just acting like a baby, innocently imitating something that is considered a symbol of innocence, so by association this is an innocent act, and doesn’t harm anyone.

    DL’s
    Liking diapers may have a similar psychological cause to being an TB or an AB, but it is something almost just an innocent. Wearing diapers is something a lot of us do for a lot of different reasons, and without even getting into those reasons, a lot of us share one reason. We like to. There is no shame we should have with ourselves, no guilt or embarrassment (to ourself, getting caught by others can be very embarrassing) or anger with ourselves should be caused either. Liking to wear something, and use it for its intended purpose, as long as it doesn’t harm anyone, has no consequences, so no one should be ashamed or anything else about it.

    Furries (BF’s and DF’s)
    A lot of what I would say for furries is above, so I would suggest checking it out. Being a furry is something, despite popular belief (thank you media for giving us a bad rap), is something that can be innocent and fun. For what are furries but people with great imaginations who sometimes like dressing up and who have their own alter ego? Nothing, that’s basically all we are. We have the wonderful imaginations like children that can create beautiful creatures. We like dressing up like the alter-ego’s we create and other fun animals and it’s usually harmless. We have a side of us that helps us be what we want to be, whether it’s less shy or nicer or happier or anything else. None of these things are negative, so why be sad, angry, or mad about being something so amazing?

    Sissies
    Despite what we’ve heard from the stereotypical jock, being a sissy is not a bad thing. So what, we like dressing like girls? Not hurting anyone, so no one should be ashamed of this. I myself am usually only a sissy on occasion, but for those who are exclusively a sissy, it might seem odd sometimes to want to dress like this. And yes, it’s a bit odd, but that only means that it’s not the majority of people doing it, there is NOTHING wrong with it though.

    Now, throughout what I’ve said above, I stated that it’s all fine and dandy as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone, which it is. If you’re buying diapers instead of food, or stealing money for supplies, or it’s hurting your marriage, or something else that causes physical or emotional pain to a living person, then it is not ok. It doesn’t mean you need to stop or feel ashamed of a part of you, it just means you need to compromise so you’re not hurting anyone anymore. No matter what anyone wears, there will be people there to love them. No matter what anyone does, there will be people there to love them. No matter who anyone is, there will be people there to love them. And those people include me and a lot of other people on this site, so you if you still are having trouble accepting yourself, then please talk to someone, because we hate to see you hurt.

    I hope this helped anyone struggling with this problem, and that’s for reading.

  2. #2

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    shadowhawk you said it perfectly. If we are not hurting ourselves or anyone else then it is not a problem. back many years ago before I accepted my diaper desires I mentioned it to a therapist and he said the same thing. If I am not hurting myself or others then it is fine. Thank you for a well written post, hopefully it will help someone who is having difficulity with this part of themselves.

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by babyjoey1 View Post
    shadowhawk you said it perfectly. If we are not hurting ourselves or anyone else then it is not a problem. back many years ago before I accepted my diaper desires I mentioned it to a therapist and he said the same thing. If I am not hurting myself or others then it is fine. Thank you for a well written post, hopefully it will help someone who is having difficulity with this part of themselves.
    Thank you, and I hope it helps people as well. I'm glad you had a positive experience telling a therapist.

  4. #4

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    Another wonderful post Shadowhawk. Being an AB has helped deal with a lot of stress in my life and I've made some awesome friends from here in the process.

  5. #5

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    Honestly? I fucking hate that I'm a DL.
    In fact, every single time I come on ADISC, I get pissed off. I literally get pissed off and going on ADISC can ruin an entire day and get me all riled up and wanting to beat the shit out of the closest thing to me.
    There's no actual REASON not to be ashamed, we just want to CONVINCE ourselves that we're really not that weird.
    Well that's bullshit.
    I'm aware I'm weird as hell. I'm aware that while everyone is out there getting laid, I'm in a chair sitting in a diaper and sucking a pacifier looking like a total faggot who can't grow the fuck up.
    If there is a God, hes a douche who fucked us over the moment of our birth.
    Sorry if I pissed anyone off, but that's the god damn truth, plus I've had a terrible day.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by MikeTheBest16 View Post
    Honestly? I fucking hate that I'm a DL.
    In fact, every single time I come on ADISC, I get pissed off. I literally get pissed off and going on ADISC can ruin an entire day and get me all riled up and wanting to beat the shit out of the closest thing to me.
    There's no actual REASON not to be ashamed, we just want to CONVINCE ourselves that we're really not that weird.
    Well that's bullshit.
    I'm aware I'm weird as hell. I'm aware that while everyone is out there getting laid, I'm in a chair sitting in a diaper and sucking a pacifier looking like a total faggot who can't grow the fuck up.
    If there is a God, hes a douche who fucked us over the moment of our birth.
    Sorry if I pissed anyone off, but that's the god damn truth, plus I've had a terrible day.
    Ok, if you want to believe that then I'm not going to argue. I am going to have to ask that you don't use the word "faggot." And yes, there is a reason not to be ashamed. We can't do anything about it, so let's not bother feeling bad about it. You can spend your entire life blaming God for "fucked us over," or you can just accept it and move on. If you just accept it and deal and/or cope with it then life will seem a whole hell of a lot better, because you're not thinking that you're messed up.

    I also said that we were weird. We are. Weird just means not in the majority, a deviant, and that's what we are.

    You didn't piss me off by the way, you just made me want to help you.

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by MikeTheBest16 View Post
    There's no actual REASON not to be ashamed, we just want to CONVINCE ourselves that we're really not that weird.
    Well that's bullshit.
    I'm aware I'm weird as hell. I'm aware that while everyone is out there getting laid, I'm in a chair sitting in a diaper and sucking a pacifier looking like a total faggot who can't grow the fuck up.
    Anyone who thinks that this is not weird is an idiot plain and simple however a lot of people here seem to confuse the idea of this being weird with this being unhealthy and this totally isn't unhealthy (it can be but that is a rare occurrence). You complain about being unable to have a sexual relationship but there are AB/DLs that have had sex and those who have no trouble finding relationships, being an AB/DL does not make relationships easy but not all relationship failures should be blamed on you being an AB/DL. Going out and picking up a girl is difficult regardless of fetishes but having no confidence is not going to help, if you really want to have sex you need to go out to social events and talk to the women there, hope you can make some sort of connection and go from there.

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by MikeTheBest16 View Post
    Honestly? I fucking hate that I'm a DL.
    In fact, every single time I come on ADISC, I get pissed off. I literally get pissed off and going on ADISC can ruin an entire day and get me all riled up and wanting to beat the shit out of the closest thing to me.
    There's no actual REASON not to be ashamed, we just want to CONVINCE ourselves that we're really not that weird.
    Well that's bullshit.
    I'm aware I'm weird as hell. I'm aware that while everyone is out there getting laid, I'm in a chair sitting in a diaper and sucking a pacifier looking like a total faggot who can't grow the fuck up.
    If there is a God, hes a douche who fucked us over the moment of our birth.
    Sorry if I pissed anyone off, but that's the god damn truth, plus I've had a terrible day.
    There is no sane person here that is trying to convince themselves they are not weird, only those who are trying to come to terms that they are ok with being the way they are. Difference does not equate to inferiority or superiority, difference equates to difference. Sadly for many this is a fact that they can not comprehend. One must also consider the practical implications of shame and guilt in cases such as this. Does it do you any good to hate yourself, or does it just destroy and embitter your soul. There is no reason to wonder why you are the way you are and curse the heavens, only you can act to change your life. If you want to date, date and come out of your shell. The only one who can curse you is yourself.

    And as for your bad day, if you need to talk to some one do it. I wont pry, but if its weighing on your mind and needs to be fixed do what ever you can.
    And don't worry you didn't offend me either.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by pajamakitten View Post
    Anyone who thinks that this is not weird is an idiot plain and simple however a lot of people here seem to confuse the idea of this being weird with this being unhealthy and this totally isn't unhealthy (it can be but that is a rare occurrence). You complain about being unable to have a sexual relationship but there are AB/DLs that have had sex and those who have no trouble finding relationships, being an AB/DL does not make relationships easy but not all relationship failures should be blamed on you being an AB/DL. Going out and picking up a girl is difficult regardless of fetishes but having no confidence is not going to help, if you really want to have sex you need to go out to social events and talk to the women there, hope you can make some sort of connection and go from there.
    What I was trying to say is everybody is doing the social norm, while I rarely even think about it.
    For me its mostly diapers and that's it.
    It's a personal problem for ME. I'm not saying DLs in general don't have sex. I have had sex before, and I've been in a few relationships, but I never even think about it, I don't really find it even remotely as attractive as diapers are. Hell, even while I was having sex, diapers were still on my mind.

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by MikeTheBest16 View Post
    What I was trying to say is everybody is doing the social norm, while I rarely even think about it.
    For me its mostly diapers and that's it.
    It's a personal problem for ME. I'm not saying DLs in general don't have sex. I have had sex before, and I've been in a few relationships, but I never even think about it, I don't really find it even remotely as attractive as diapers are. Hell, even while I was having sex, diapers were still on my mind.
    So then, it's ok to not want sex. In that we are the same, I'm not interested in sex either. That however is no reason to despair, you like what you like and don't what you don't. It doesn't mean life will be unfulfilling. Also, if you had sex and didn't like it then what is there to despair about, you know your not missing anything. Don't mourn the fact that you don't like sex any more than you would mourn the fact that you don't like kittens. The point is different strokes for different folks. Non disperar, chi sa?

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