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Thread: For those who have told their significant other...

  1. #1

    Question For those who have told their significant other...

    I just wanted to ask this.
    I posted a thread a few days ago about how I came out about all of this to my ex-girlfriend (who I originally broke up with due to the disconnect I felt from having to withhold this from her) and, I'm happy to say, she's now my girlfriend again. (:
    I'm wondering, do any of you ever find yourselves get over-excited about your *B/DLism toward your newly-briefed significant other?
    I mean, I'm just trying really hard not to push it on her. But it's almost like I can barely help it. It's like venting. Now that I have someone to talk to about it.. you know? And I was wondering if anyone else gets like this, and how their significant other reacts to it. I've been trying to curb it. It's just easy to get carried away.

  2. #2


    It took me twenty three years to tell my husband and I have to say that I wish that I told him sooner because he has been very accepting and I am now 24/7 I do find though that I want to talk about it probably more than he wants to listen lol

  3. #3


    Exactly. I just feel like I get annoying with it. But I just get so hyped about it. Like FINALLY. SOMEONE KNOWS.

  4. #4


    It's pretty common I imagine.

    You have spent a good amount of your life not talking about it at all in person I imagine. When you finally tell someone, you have this outlet to talk about it with. There is also a lot to talk about, different things, just look at the ADISC conversations themselves. There is pretty much an endless amount of information to say or discuss, and when you finally have someone who will listen to you, you feel like you need to say it all.

    I'm sure it gets annoying, I still bring it up with my bf ;P

  5. #5

  6. #6


    I know exactly what you mean. You want to talk because you never had a.chance before, and by talking you are moving foreword. But at the same time, you feel like you can become to pushy. It makes you worry if you are annoying or moving to fast with her and are gonna push her away. Soon, you go awhile without bringing the subject up waiting and hoping that she does. But she doesn't, so you begin to worry that she doesn't want to have no interest in the subject. You eventually work up the nerve to bring it back up, and in my case, I found out she didn't want to bug or embarrass me by bringing it up.
    Did I hit the nail on the head? :-) My advise is take it slow. Explain all the crazy mixed emotions that you are going through right now to her, keep communication open, but assure her if your bugging her or going to fast with something that she needs to speak up about her feelings, and its perfectly okay for her to. Good luck and don't worry things will eventually run its course. Me telling my wife made our relationship so much more stronger and were more open with each other. We introduce new things into our relationship and have had several new experiences. Believe it or not, none of it has involved diapers. :-)

  7. #7


    told my wife before we were married that was 34 years ago. She just passed away 4 weeks ago and i am lost now. i find myself drinking more and wearing a diaper every night. She would help me out with mine ie change me play with me life was good. now i'm not sure what i am going to do. it was hard finding her.

  8. #8


    I told my girlfriend before she was my girlfriend.I do not trust easily as I should, although I blame this mostly on my mother for ruining my teenage life as I never went out and had to be back before dark during the summer.

    She is accepting about all of this and has told me that "All my faults are something that she loves about me" or something to that effect. I finally got to stay the night with her a little while back and I have to say I had the time of my life. Although, she said she finds this cute, she said she wants some attention too.The mommy thing doesn't really do it for her and I understand that bc she is not into this fetish.

    I do try to keep it to a minimum as I am still kinda embarrassed/uncomfortable myself, when I try to bring it up. She is keeping Sunshine ( my teddy-bear ) for me still even though I am back from boot-camp. I also got another teddy bear named Tucker from her. :-)
    She has been very good to me about all this. And so I will end on this topic.

  9. #9


    HuskyAllie, this is a great and thoughtful question. I've shared many of your same feelings. I told my wife just before we were engaged. I was thrilled that she was accepting of it. However, she was not nor has she been really into participating with me.

    Over our years of marriage, I've gone back and forth between wanting to really involve her and wanting to really honor her by not wearing around her or discussing it. I guess I can sort of liken it to the binge-purge cycle. There are moments when I really want my wife participating, and there are moments when I'm glad she's not. At first, this manifsted itself by me constantly asking her, "Am I doing OK? Do we need to talk about it?" I soon realized this annoyed her more than helped the situation. But I let her know from the very beginning that I was always open to talking about it, and she did speak to me a few times about some things she wanted me to do differently.

    However, after several years of marriage, I've come to this conclusion - my wife wants me to be strong in all aspects of my life, and that includes diapers. If I do it well, confidently, and respecting her, she's happy. If I either wimp out and act like somethings wrong or become forceful about it, she's not. As long as I'm acting with moderation and good judgement - no problem.

    So Lobie, my advice is to man up and wear diapers as you need to. It may sound like a paradox, but diapers are a part of you - the you that your girlfriend is in love with. Discuss it with her as you feel necessary, but treat it simply as who you are. I know you're excited to have someone who knows, and it's not a bad thing to explore it with a partner. At the same time, respect her and who she is - the girl you fell in love with. Be the loving, caring guy who supports her first and foremost and treats her like a princess. Keep the communication open, and enjoy your relationship! Best wishes!

  10. #10


    My AB/DL lifestyle is one of the first things I tell someone when I meet them so it is never a problem later on.

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