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Thread: Intrusive Thoughts

  1. #1

    Default Intrusive Thoughts

    I have had really bad intrusive thoughts for as long as I can remember, but only recently have I actually told anybody about it. I have a son who is nearly seven weeks old, and I find myself trying to distance myself from him in order to prevent my doing any of the things that I'm thinking about. I don't wish to share these thoughts in detail; they involve all sorts of abuse up to and including homicide and I'm sure that nobody really wants to read about that.

    My GP knows about this so I don't need you to tell me to seek professional help. The point of this thread is not so much me seeking support, but rather a curiosity; according to one psychologist and this Wikipedia article, most people experience intrusive thoughts, but most people do not dwell on them like I do.

    So, what I'd like to know is if you have any intrusive thoughts (as described in the Wikipedia article) and how well you deal with them.

    I'm also aware that I could have some form of OCD, so I don't need you to point that out (I'm not looking for a diagnosis, here), although if you have been diagnosed with OCD, you could say so.

  2. #2

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    Quote Originally Posted by Arlikra View Post
    So, what I'd like to know is if you have any intrusive thoughts (as described in the Wikipedia article) and how well you deal with them.
    I've had experiences with intrusive thoughts, linked to depression and anxiety. I've had periods where I've been gripped by the same thought pattern for 24hours and more, so it can be very stressful. I'm not very confident with dealing with them, but I've found two methods that help me:
    1.criticising the thoughts can sometimes help in regaining a feeling of control over your own mind - saying to yourself "no, I'm not going to do that, that's absurd"
    2.having something on to distract me - when I can't sleep because of the thoughts I put the radio on and lie in bed without "trying" to sleep, the chatter from speech radio breaks up my own thoughts - you could use music/TV/whatever though

    another method I've heard of people using is an elastic band on your wrist - when you want to break up thoughts you snap it and that should distract you for a moment to help you think of something else (haven't used this one for me so far, so can't comment)

    Hope you feel better soon, and congratulations for the new baby :-)

  3. #3

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    Self distraction is a good technique for dealing
    I know I deal with intrusive though and ocd, and somedays it will drive me to pick at myself to escape the thoughts not a healthy habit.
    But i have found good music, work, and hypnosis effective distractions esp. hypnosis as this has helped in similar ways to guided meditation giving me mantras/triggers to say in my head, that open up new thought paths so I can escape the one I am on.

  4. #4

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    Huh, I had no idea what that was called but I have had them for a while. I have social anxiety and will sometimes get panic attacks. The way I now deal with those is I learned how to meditate. So whenever I had anxiety attack I would go somewhere isolated, close my eyes, and just empty my mind of thoughts. Eventually I got pretty good at doing this and I used it to help prevent anxiety as well. I now use this method whenever I start thinking about things I don't like to think about (which usually involves embarrassing moments from my past) and I feel much calmer and more focused.

  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by Arlikra View Post
    I have had really bad intrusive thoughts for as long as I can remember, but only recently have I actually told anybody about it. I have a son who is nearly seven weeks old, and I find myself trying to distance myself from him in order to prevent my doing any of the things that I'm thinking about. I don't wish to share these thoughts in detail; they involve all sorts of abuse up to and including homicide and I'm sure that nobody really wants to read about that.

    My GP knows about this so I don't need you to tell me to seek professional help. The point of this thread is not so much me seeking support, but rather a curiosity; according to one psychologist and this Wikipedia article, most people experience intrusive thoughts, but most people do not dwell on them like I do.

    So, what I'd like to know is if you have any intrusive thoughts (as described in the Wikipedia article) and how well you deal with them.

    I'm also aware that I could have some form of OCD, so I don't need you to point that out (I'm not looking for a diagnosis, here), although if you have been diagnosed with OCD, you could say so.
    I know you are not looking for a diagnosis but it sounds like a bad case of Pure O, which i have.

    Worry,worry, worry and worrying about worry.

    Purely obsessional OCD.

    Researching over and over again, how, what, why?

    I know what you're going through, and spent a hell of alot of time researching OCD to point of me knowing what it is and being diagnosed with it.

    This form of OCD is non-ritual and the type of OCD is harm based OCD and could become any form of OCD that you fear the most.

    Good news this form of OCD is quite common and is treatable.

    The fact that you are aware of these terribly irrational thoughts, suggest you are least likely to follow through with your actions.

    You are such a worry pot, and being a mother means you'll will be a really good one too, due to your taking extra special care of your child.

    Scientifically a part of your brain called your amygdala is larger then normal and causes havok with your neurochemistry giving you plenty of irrational signals.

    YOU CANNOT FIGHT THIS ALONE!

    Constant OCD can worsen, whereby the extreme anxiety finally cracks with panic attacks and swings into depression/major depression/severe depression.

    OCD+Severe depression=dangerous potential.

    You do not want to even get there so why take that chance?

    Please heed my warning as this very thing happened to me around 1 year ago and although i finally fought threw it, its still there in minor moderate doses and i would not have beaten it without getting that help.

    My GP thought it was just depression and dealt with the immediate result, for which i now know the root cause of my depression was.

    You will need some sort of therapy and medication if this does not go away or is severe, because some people live with this terrible affliction for years.

    I have heard of some people dealing with it for 20+ years!

    I could not image living that hell for all that time.


    I do not suggest you avoid the child due to your thoughts because your OCD feeds on self-doubt and what you fear most, and avoidance only strengthens it further.


    FACE YOUR FEARS AND LIVE WITH THE INCREDIBLE ANXIETY IT CREATES WITHIN YOU.

    Do not fight your thoughts, instead accept them however horrible until they bore you and your reaction to them weakens.
    EG: if you fear you may drop your child off a balcony, by fighting the thought or suppressing, only brings it back later and makes it worse.

    Instead fight this irrational though by thinking i may drop my child off a balcony but not now, not today and think of how absolutely silly that thought was.

    Make light of it, even if it disgusts you because you are obviously also a very sensitive person and OCD knows how to push your buttons.

    You are essentially fighting yourself and your belief in OCD will ultimately kill off its severity.

    I have heard mention that its a sort of self fulfilling prophecy, with negative outcomes.

    When i was depressed, OCD toiled with my emotions along with the irrationality/cognitive impairment of the thoughts.

    You are not what you think, and fight it knowing that people have it all over the world.

    Millions of them and none of the people who sought help for OCD have ever caused the harm they thought.

    It makes you a stronger person in that your analytical powers can be sharpened for good, along with a vivid imagination.

    Your empathy is enhanced and your sensitivity as an anxious person finally reduces in tiny increments until, ultimately you become less anxious.

    You will have to live with the uncertainty of whether you will or wont harm your child even if you know you wont.

    Eventually your brain gets tired of torturing you with the worry, you are not bothered by it and something new that you may fear could pop up and its another uncertainty you have to deal with.

    You cannot prove what you can and cannot do with 100% certainty and this is how it affects you.

    Practice mindfulness, a process of witnessing your actions in a non-judgmental way and witnessing your reactions to your intrusive thoughts.

    The fact that you can actually do this process is proof that you are not your thoughts.



    Please take this self test: PURE OBSESSIONAL OCD TEST - OCD Center of Los Angeles

    This guy knows his stuff on pure O, since he suffered from this nasty OCD from too:OCD | Robert Lindsay

    Finally you are my hero for having a kid, i hope one day my OCD dissipates for good and i could enjoy the privilege of being a good although probably a over caring/worrying dad.

    Use the ABDL thing as your stress mangement tool/coping mechanism and use deep breathing techniques as well.

    YOU CAN DO IT!

  6. #6

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    I've had 'intrusive' thoughts since forever really. In fact sometimes I do get a little disturbed by how violently sexual some of them were, especially the ones I had as a child. :S

    Sometimes I do get little homicidal thoughts... In fact just before reading this thread I was out on a walk and the thought of skinning somebody alive popped into my head... Suicidal thoughts are common too.

    I generally deal with them by not really caring about them. I'm not going to skin anybody alive, so I'll just have little daydream about it and move on.
    Although I can see how it would be much harder when the thoughts are about a real person, especially somebody you know. I wish you the best of luck with feeling better.

  7. #7

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    I am glad to see I am not the only one who has this. Most of mine are suicidal and they sometimes scare the crap out of me. STORY TIME! We were at the Royal Gorge (large canyon with a really cool suspension bridge over it) but as we were walking over it, I kept getting really bad thoughts about jumping off. Nothing I believe I would ever act on, but none the less, I got off that thing as fast as possible. I am afraid of heights as it is, I can't even get on a ladder to change a light bulb without freaking the F*** out.

  8. #8

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    I don't really think of it as a problem for me personally, but I've had some intrusive thoughts too...

    The worst was after my dad died, and with my conscious mind vaguely wondering how I could best honour his life and always remember the best times we had together as a family, my evil "intrusive" brain thought... "Hmmm... okay... What would be the worst thing I could do that would degrade my memory and dishonour him. Wouldn't it be hilariously bad if I got such a thought into my head and couldn't get it out?!" And of course every time I remembered him, a grotesque invented image of him naked would pop into my brain.

    At first I was furious and really annoyed with myself, but that seemed to make it worse. Try spending an hour concentrating as hard as you can on not thinking about polar bears. Chances are that you'll think of little else.

    I just "ignored" such images, in much the same way as you might ignore a toddler using a swear word for the first time. Giving it undue attention makes the brain see it as something significant. I'd just try to laugh when it happened and tell myself that I really don't need to worry about dishonouring my father's memory: I know he was an absolute legend, the best father anyone could wish for and I loved him so much that no matter what images my mind could dream up, it would make no difference to the high regard I have for him. My love for him is far, far too powerful for a made-up image to ever change the way I think about him. Subsequently, each time I recalled the image it had less of an impact, I got less stressed about it, and eventually that "evil" part of my brain just got bored as it couldn't easily "press my buttons" to provoke a reaction.

    At various other times, I've felt the urge to jump when close to cliff edges, etc. I think I know that I wouldn't dare jump... but occasionally I can't put the thought out of my head, and can feel my muscles twitching as if I was just about to leap forward but stopped myself just in time. I've been suicidal in the past (and have suicidal thoughts periodically), so maybe my brain is just playing stupid games with itself...

    And I don't know if it counts, but I always get a bit panicky when walking through those anti-theft tag detector things they have in some shops. I know that I'm not a thief and haven't picked anything up that I haven't paid for... but... what if I'd gone crazy and forgotten about putting something in my bag? What if someone else put something in my bag in an attempt to frame me?! Fortunately the panic only starts as I leave the shop; five metres further on, I've passed the detectors, the alarm hasn't gone off and I can put it out of my mind again... Over the years this has got less and less.

    As I said, I don't really see this as a major problem (for me). I suspect most people have intrusive thoughts of some kind and to some degree at some point in their lives. Mine haven't really been overwhelming enough to have given me more than a few brief moments of fear/anxiety.



    Quote Originally Posted by Arlikra View Post
    I have a son who is nearly seven weeks old, and I find myself trying to distance myself from him in order to prevent my doing any of the things that I'm thinking about.
    Would it help to remind yourself how much you love your son, and how irrational the thoughts are since they (hopefully!) go against every moral fibre in your being? Would telling such thoughts "not to be so silly" and trying to laugh about it help? I don't know... Hope you manage to get it under control...


  9. #9

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    I have thoughts about torchering people and stuff, they aren't sexual but I had a rough life and I find them calming so they aren't really intrusive to me.

  10. #10
    teddybear206

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    well as a bit of a psycho my thoughts on others often include homicide/murder but the best thing to do is just keep queit and talk to a specialist , also id advise to take and sharp knives and such away from you when your stressed or sonething. best of luck to you from a guy whop understands.

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