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Thread: Knowing about diapers, varying comfort levels, and mutual consent

  1. #1

    Default Knowing about diapers, varying comfort levels, and mutual consent

    It is not as much a story as it is food for thought.

    I was out playing disc golf with my cousin today. When he asked me what time we were meeting someone tomorrow I handed him my phone and told him to look at my email to check. When he opened my email he said "Okay, now what?"

    When I took my phone from him the new email on top and in bold type was;

    NASA Inspired Wellness Diapers
    Only 2 days left - 59 Dollars for Wellness Briefs Order Now!

    Now this was no great revelation. I don't advertise, but many people close to me do know that I wear diapers. However, there was an awkward pause before we talked about it. I'm not sure if he was embarrassed or if he thought I was since I chuckled as soon as I saw the subject line.

    Now and finally my food for thought.

    1. How many of you consider how comfortable other people are discussing your life as regarding diapers?

    2. Does anyone else think they may have been less than considerate in sharing information like this that someone did not need to know and in some cases didn't want to know in the first place?

    3. Do you think sharing this type of information could in some small way be considered assault toward someone who didn't want to know?

  2. #2


    I don't think it was inappropriate since your cousin discovered the phone text. It probably would be inappropriate if you initiated the conversation out of the clear blue. I said on another thread where the topic was about sharing information, that there are those rare friends that we have a very special relationship with, and that they might be the ones we would share something so personal about ourselves. These people are those we might call sole mates.

  3. #3


    I think you handled the situation appropriately. I function on a need-to-know basis. I tell folks what they need to know when they need to know it in order to lessen awkward moments and avoid surprises and embarrassment on everyone's part. Your cousin found the text. The discussion was open.

    I tell good friends and those who will be spending significant time with me, cuz they'll likely find out sooner or later. Even then, I almost never frame it as a fetish but simply as a "need." I don't need to know their fetishes, and they don't need to know mine.

  4. #4


    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    I don't think it was inappropriate since your cousin discovered the phone text.

    Quote Originally Posted by BachBrahms View Post
    I think you handled the situation appropriately.

    I believe you are misinterpreting the situation and the following questions. The questions are general and, while inspired by, may not pertain directly to this instance.

    I wondered if when you brought up diapers, perhaps out of the blue, you were violating the person as they may not have wanted to know or in other terms otherwise given consent to the information being forced upon them.

    For instance, I tormented a fraternity brother, yeah not that uncommon a practice, by letting him find out. With him being compassionate and tactful I let him awkwardly dance around the topic of diapers until I spoke with him about it. I then walked around in a diaper when it was just him and me around without taking the time to consider his discomfort. Thankfully we are still close friends, but I could have seriously strained our friendship by forcing it upon him.

  5. #5


    Wearing diapers is a private matter just as the underwear you wear. If you tell you might be crossing the line as most people do not care what underwear you wear.

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