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Thread: For fecally incontinent - mature only please.

  1. #1

    Default For fecally incontinent - mature only please.

    I know there are things that we just deal with most of the time to the point we actually kind of take it for granted, or just tell like an embarrassing story but I have been wondering about this now for 2 days and I can't think of any better place to ask. Unfortunately I can't think of how else to ask it without giving certain details...

    I was at a restaurant with a co-worker, friendly client and a friend when I had sudden onset diarrhea. I do have the occasional messy accident but it's usually well formed or at least easily contained in the diaper. Well, as I sat there my stomach gurgled a little then cramped and before I could even think about going to the restroom then just change... as I sat there it was more like a surprise attack. I stood up to race to the bathroom but it was already too late. I could instantly smell it and knew everyone else could too. The best I could hope for was they would think it was just gas. I pulled out my wallet and just tossed down what I had and said I really had to leave. As I turned to leave, I could feel the distinct feel of it leaking and rapidly. It was one of the few days I didn't wear a diaper cover but I still don't think it would have mattered. Before I made it to the truck, I was already visibly soiled.

    My question for those who I'm sure have had similar experiences, are there any tips or tricks you use to provide some level of protection against this kind of incident? Wearing doubles/inserts isn't really an option and I truly think even the diaper cover would have failed miserably. (Since they periodically do even for wetting leaks).

    I have Loperamide but it's for 'after the fact'. Is this just something ya'll deal with or is it also a rare occasion? I've had a few similar instances but never like that - and never ever want to again! *if possible*

  2. #2


    Diarrhea is an illness of the digestive tract, and it befalls everyone of us every now and again. Obviously, the end result is the same: Sudden need to evacuate the rear, and what comes out is very liquidy. People with perfect control over their nether regions may be able to hold it back long enough to make a (very awkward looking) rush for the toilet, but even for them it may be too late some times.
    In other words: Continent people may be more likely to be able to hold it, but when it does come out without control, they're screwed as it's instantly visible. Even just a "wet far". Diapered people have the advantage that the diaper can take at least some of it, and in your case, it only became apparent by the time you got up and ran out. Imagine leaking on the restaurant chair you sat on

    In other words: I call this a tie between continent and inco folk! Incos may get it more frequently, but their diapers will catch some of it. For continent folks it's rare, but instant visible embarrassment.


  3. #3


    If the diarrhea happens often for you, you might be able to pick up on warning signs that can sometimes come hours before the attack actually hits. Each persons body is different so you will just have to be observant and be open to things that you wouldn't even associate with it. An example of this is my father. He is continent but every 1 to 3 weeks he goes into uncontrollable diarrhea. After 4 months of having accidents we discovered that every single time that he went into diarrhea, he had this putrid smelling belching a couple of hours before. Now, as soon as we smell that type of belch I help him into a diaper(he is disabled and I am his full time caretaker). It works out well because he never has to wear any other time but if we didn't discover the tell(belching) he probably would be wearing full time now.

    I hope this helps you.

  4. #4


    Lets just say this: Having that during adulthood is bad, as a kid (thinking about ages 8-15) it's worse.

  5. #5


    I don't have incontinence, but I can certainly empathize with your situation. Sudden attacks of diarrhea can happen to anyone, and having it happen during social functions can be extremely uncomfortable. On the bright side, at least you were wearing a diaper to catch most of it.

  6. #6


    I wear a diaper mainly for urinary incontinence, but have times when I cannot hold onto the contents of my bowel. This is not all that frequent but is unpredictable and potentially very embarrassing. A really bad episode will not be contained by a ordinary diaper, but the ones designed for fecal incontinence are much better.

  7. #7


    I thank you all so much for your replies, and I've had diarrhea before a lot and notice things like signs, that it can be a bad situation, etc... but I think what I am just sorta asking is *still a lil embarrassed an don't want to admit it to myslef* .... It has been becoming more and more a problem. That was just the worst incident. I have been urinary incon as many/most know but besides the occasional accident I have still had pretty good control back there. I have always empathized with those with the problem but couldn't imagine exactly what the extra difficulties would be - and never wanted to find out. Now, even with meds... it's been happening more and more and without warnings. Almost like stressIC, I could just cough or sneeze and would end up "instantly defecating". (just not always runny) I have never really had the issue since I was much younger, but now I also seem to be having the problem while sleeping tho not in quantity.

    I had a checkup with my neurologist 2 weeks ago, he said he didn't see anything different but I have noticed I'm having less and less 'control' back there. It's just got me pretty scared. I've been trying to stay 'strong' about it and even try to laugh it off by thinking 'stuff happens' and it'll pass - but it's getting to me to the point I'm constantly worried all day and it's affecting my work even. This is why I was asking if there was something that others might have found as a 'trick' to help with these instances. I can handle it with no prob on my own but not in front of others. I know about the chloro-tabs but not much else. I can talk to a doc on their level about urinary tract issues now, but this is foreign territory. I'm not even sure what the best diapers are for it.

    ---------- Post added at 16:15 ---------- Previous post was at 16:13 ----------

    dayannight - have you found ways, things to say, personal thoughts on how to deal with those really embarassing times?

    jackthewriter - I know just what you mean by that and normally yes - but these are mostly without warning or only seconds before.

    peachy - Thank God for already wearing! If I didn't instantly stand up as soon as I noticed it would have been too late. From the time I did until I turned was maybe 15 seconds - then it was already leaking down my leg. I'm not sure if it was visible at the table (of if they noticed to look) but by the time I was at the truck (only about 50 feet from where I was sitting) it was very visible. The back of my legs were wet and, well.. trust me. I'll leave out the details. I haven't been back but I know ppl there saw it. At work so far, no one has said anything.

  8. #8
    Butterfly Mage


    I very rarely have a fecal-incontinent incident. The thing I do when that happens is to change my diaper as soon as feasibly possible. I really don't like poop at all. The quicker you change, the faster the smell goes away and the better it is for your skin.

  9. #9


    Yes BM, that is very good. If you mess, change quickly. We all say that to many people already. Trust me when I say I couldn't change and get cleaned up fast enough after that.... But my questions are little more concerning a specific type of issue and asking for possible protection options prior to the incident. My apologies if I was too vague in my posts.

  10. #10


    Quote Originally Posted by Kitsiulla View Post
    dayannight - have you found ways, things to say, personal thoughts on how to deal with those really embarassing times?
    It was hard to find things to say to family members but a little easier because over the years my partner and others had very occasionally - and I mean once in many years - had messy pants accidents. I am so glad I was sympathetic and supportive then! I think fecal incontinence is very hard to manage, especially when it is not happening all the time and so is not planned for in your daily routine. It is harder to find adult size "nappy liners" these days but they do help contain soft or worse poop. The big advantage is in clearing up as you can flush the liner and it's contents. Booster pads like these: Tranquility TopLiner Contour Pad (Booster Pads) can help and are not too bulky. Keeping emergency supplies handy when you can and not saying too much if it happens in company - people will probably realize that you have a problem, but unless you make it explicit will not know the extent and are likely to "pretend to ignore it" on the basis that they are glad it's not their pants its happened in.
    Last edited by Martin; 17-Nov-2011 at 18:26.

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