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Thread: Ok here is a problem

  1. #1

    Default Ok here is a problem

    Right i have two sides to me as im sure most of you do... i have a "normal" relationship and a "daddy" side of me.

    And its now come to the cross road of where one has found out about the other, and i have been given a choice, loose the Daddy side of me and nappies etc all together, or continue down this path and loose the normal relationship, whom i really enjoy being with but know something is missing...

    What the hell do i do?

  2. #2

    Default

    Would you care to elaborate some more, please? I don't know if you are referring/including someone else or just yourself.

  3. #3

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    does not sound healthy persay...even if it's a fetish/otherside to you...if your partner isn't willing to cope with what you have after finding it...well
    i guess the saying is it takes 100% from both parties to make it last, or some other metaphorical (and more lightly toned) statement to suffice. D:

    i hear you on this and i straight up left the DL side of things for two years...came back the moment the relationship ended...it's a yearning i couldn't ignore

    also, elaborate a bit please if you would be so kind :3

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by Entity View Post
    Would you care to elaborate some more, please? I don't know if you are referring/including someone else or just yourself.
    I found out he has a girlfriend or rather, his girlfriend found out about me being his (online) AB.

  5. #5

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    Most lovers don't like to share. In other words, your significant other is not going to feel secure if you are emotionally going to someone else, especially for something, the first party either isn't giving, or can't give. I think you do need to make a choice, because you are not being fair, and probably not honest to the party of the first part.

  6. #6

    Default

    You brought this upon yourself, you need to make the decision yourself. Simple as that.

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by daviej86 View Post
    Right i have two sides to me as im sure most of you do... i have a "normal" relationship and a "daddy" side of me.

    And its now come to the cross road of where one has found out about the other, and i have been given a choice, loose the Daddy side of me and nappies etc all together, or continue down this path and loose the normal relationship, whom i really enjoy being with but know something is missing...

    What the hell do i do?
    I would respectfully suggest, that you deal with "...something missing..." on 'it's' own merits...entirely separate from the situation at hand...

  8. #8

    Default

    That would be a very rough place to be in. I would not consider not telling someone I wanted to be with long term about this sort of thing.

    Is your 'normal' relationship partner not at all into this?
    Is this really something you want to 'hide' or 'push aside', and can do that without any sort of resentment?

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    Most lovers don't like to share. In other words, your significant other is not going to feel secure if you are emotionally going to someone else, especially for something, the first party either isn't giving, or can't give. I think you do need to make a choice, because you are not being fair, and probably not honest to the party of the first part.
    This.

    As for my take, it sounds as if the person (not sure what pronoun to use) in your mainstream relationship has needs that aren't being met (namely, monogamy) and your needs in that relationship also aren't being met (daddy role). However, it sounds as if you value this relationship too much to just walk away. I think you need to sit down with him/her and come clean about your ABDL side and go from there.

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    Most lovers don't like to share. In other words, your significant other is not going to feel secure if you are emotionally going to someone else, especially for something, the first party either isn't giving, or can't give. I think you do need to make a choice, because you are not being fair, and probably not honest to the party of the first part.
    This sums it up nicely, your girlfriend doesn't want to share you with another woman even if it is only an online thing and not a real relationship. She doesn't like the idea of you being that emotionally bonded to another woman when you are already emotionally bonded to here; you basically have a choice here, a physical+emotional relationship IRL or an emotional one online. And unfortunately it looks like there no way of getting around it and not choosing.

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