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Thread: Another self-hatred thread

  1. #1

    Default Another self-hatred thread

    Sooo.... I've been going through the whole self hatred phase lately. I guess a lot of it comes from confusion. What am I confused about? My whole sexuality. I cannot get sexually aroused without diapers or one of my other fetishes involved. But the funny thing is, Its not even about a guy/girl indulging in the fetish, its the fetish itself, if that makes any sense at all. I am not attracted to men or women, and I hate it. As for the diapers and what not, I've been having a war in my head as to why this is wrong, and I feel gross and disappointing every time I put on a diaper. There isn't really a point to this thread I guess, just a rant. Well thanks for reading...


    I love adisc lol

  2. #2

    Default

    Head Wars are more common than you might think and are not (in my experience) linked to any one kind of sexuality or means of expressing it - we can all have highs and lows after doing what we feel inclined or impelled to. Sometimes the intensity of the feeling surprises us and sometimes things that should have resulted in a real "high" just don't seem to have had the desired effect. It is probably better to have a "love/hate" relationship with diapers than with another person and picking up the clues from your age and tag line I would stick my neck out and say there is plenty of time for change and for things to get sorted out. Saying things like that is not much help at the moment - but everyone here wants you to believe things will get better and it's great that you post and express your feelings. Perhaps the question you should ask yourself should take into account the reality that wearing diapers harms no one - so perhaps you are really saying "why are diapers wrong for me?" I wouldn't mind betting that one day you will look back and either say "Diapers are a permanant part of my life and I can accept that" or (and I think more likely) "Diapers were a necessary stage on my journey to self understanding and sexual adjustment- and I am glad they were there when I needed them".

    Very best wishes - keep us posted.

  3. #3

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    Believe it or not but there are other people out there who are not attracted to either guys or girls. That is okay. If you can face your sexuality and come to terms with that, your wrongness and gross feelings will probably go away. It just sounds to me like you are confused and just need to cut yourself some slack.

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by turtleie View Post
    Sooo.... I've been going through the whole self hatred phase lately. I guess a lot of it comes from confusion. What am I confused about? My whole sexuality. I cannot get sexually aroused without diapers or one of my other fetishes involved. But the funny thing is, Its not even about a guy/girl indulging in the fetish, its the fetish itself, if that makes any sense at all. I am not attracted to men or women, and I hate it. As for the diapers and what not, I've been having a war in my head as to why this is wrong, and I feel gross and disappointing every time I put on a diaper. There isn't really a point to this thread I guess, just a rant. Well thanks for reading.
    If you want to settle your concience about this then you have to decide what makes something right or wrong in the first place and then evaluate your diaper fetish against that standard. For me, I see the basic moral standard as harm: Causing harm to others is morally wrong. Wearing diapers doesn't hurt anyone, therefore, wearing diapers for pleasure isn't wrong. That's just how I look at it though. You have to determine your own beliefs on right and wrong.

  5. #5
    Supersam1223

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    It's like looking in a mirror!

    I'm just riding it out, I'll get somewhere eventually, wherever that may be.

    Try not to think about it too much.

  6. #6

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    You are fine At your age hormones are rocketing and your sexuality is going to take a lot of turns and spins before it settles down into who you are. Try to enjoy the ride and concentrate on your education and your future. Your sexuality will settle. Hating yourself is counterproductive and devalues you as a human being.

  7. #7

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    Thanks for the replies everyone! I guess I do just need to accept it somehow. I looooovvveee adisc haha

  8. #8

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    I have the same war in my head all the time

    For now, Im going with the "its not really affecting my daily life, or hurting me in anyway, low risk right now so why not?" route, and so here I am
    I fully plan on stopping later, when it becomes a problem.

    Hormones are raging, which causes this. Just know that its natural.

  9. #9

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    I remember a Law and Order SVU episode, or maybe CSI, but there was a guy who couldn't get off unless there was porn involved. He would bring his porn with him when he had sex with his girl friend. Eventually she discovered what he was doing, blew up about it, and he killed her. Good television, but it talked about a real problem. Many males are so self exposed to porn that it begins to become the singular stimulus. They have conditioned their brain to it. There's a psychological term for it, but I forget what that is.

    It's possible that you've done that to yourself with diapers. If you've had all your sex with diapers, that now has become your primarily stimulus. There are techniques to deal with this, but you would have to seek a psychologist for this, as I don't know what those techniques are. I'm sure they include changing the stimulation.

    That said, as one member pointed out, we do have members who are asexual. They just aren't turned on by other people. There could be many reasons for this. Supposedly we are attracted by pheromones, but what if you're not? What if the smell, the touch, sweat of others is a turn off? I see all of that as possible. The chemistry has to be right with another person. My desires are unique, though if you are in love, many things can be over come. I think only a professional can help you with all of this. It's something to think about if you don't want to spend the rest of your life living alone.

  10. #10
    WarrenW

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    I have gone through giant guilt trips over this too, i think everyone here has. I started getting interested in diaper stuff like 10 or 11 years ago and it was b4 I got hooked up to the web and couldn't understand what was going on with me. Thought I was totally loco for wanting to do something so weird, but then found the web and got curious and just couldn't believe there was so many sites devoted to diaper wearers and such. Also went thru numerous binge-and-purge cycles.I think it's more common than you think and lots easier to accept when you know you're not alone.

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