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Thread: What do you expect from a carer?

  1. #1
    Peachy

    Default What do you expect from a carer?

    The idea for this thread came to me after a private chat with one member here and also after some recent experience as a carer myself.

    I put it into the "Adult Baby"-forum because this topic applies mostly to people who would be willing to actually meet a carer in person and spend some with with them, and that's obviously only older TBs or ABs (anyone over your local age of consent). Anyone else is free to reply too though.

    Let'S assume that you and a person you trust very much have agreed to meet up face-to-face, and that the other person will be your carer in the AB/TB sense. The purpose of this thread is for everyone to describe their expectations and feelings about a meeting like that.

    What kind of role should the carer play? Should the carer be controlling or dominant, or rather loving and gentle?
    What would you want your carer to do? Which activities would you expect? Which activities would you avoid at all costs?
    Maybe decribe your feelings, fears, nervousness. How would you set up a meeting like that?

    Please keep things realistic. I.e. don't post your dreams or fantasies here about going to some AB carer who has everything - from cribs to any item of clothing imaginable (unless you actually know someone like that...yes, it happens). Think about getting together with someone who's not a professional in that field and may be as unfamiliar and nervous as you may be.
    And we want to try to have a mature discussion here, so keep the sexual stuff or immature conversations to a minimum. I'd really appreciate if people took the time to think long and hard before posting and not just post one sentence along the lines of "I want them to change my diaper!". Be more elaborate! Oh, and this is not the place to post warnings about not meeting up with people IRL...I said "meeting with someone you trust very much", so that's covered already.

    Peachy

  2. #2
    Secret

    Default

    When I get out of college I plan on getting into the AB/DL world, mostly as a caretaker.
    But that is some years away, and I would probably meet them a couple of times at like a coffee shop or something before we even consider AB play. And even then we would probably have discussed our boundaries and what we expect from each other during the Ab time.

    my 2 dollars

  3. #3

    Default

    Interesting topic, although "mommies and daddies" arn't really my thing. But I feel that it would be an enjoyable experience either way.

    I would say I was in need of a more of a loving and gentle carer than a dominant one. Although, as babies your carer is in control. But they can't go and treat you like a dog and give you commands, I haver really seen any baby with that kind is discipline. But maybe there is a few people who do enjoy it. I had too many troubles in my own younger days, I just feel being loved improves my self esteem much more than the domination stuff.

    So in live with the caring theme, all hugs around! snuggles, smiles, Eskimo kisses. Just general typical body language that shows that I'm cared about. Add a bit of physical contact. Then I might be in heaven. Well a little over statement, but I'd be grinning like I haven't grinned before.

    Oh clothes, I guess its fully clothed typical indoor clothes of the 1990s. Sensible wear I guess. Makes me feel a little more homely. And to add to the the homely feel, of hwo things use to be when I was a kid, I would like to play with my toys, Yes, trains cars and K'Nex. I loved K'Nex. Lego... Pft :P


    As for seeing my body naked. I wouldn't mind some "bath time" where we would play in the bath. Would add to the physical contact business as well as something that you typically have when you were a small toddler. then maybe, just maybe , put on a clean fresh diaper on me and dress me.

    Then when the time is right, I might return the favour and swap places in wished too. We'll do a little planning before hand how things are going to work out. As there are those 'bonus' things you want to do that may be special to them. Such as I don't know, ensure they always have a pacci in their mouth?

    I am no fan on baby talk, however, all talk would be kept simple and short. I never really was a big talker. And I don't like noise, it has to be quite too, otherwise it'll upset me. Infact, all stimuli must be controlled. Vision lights, sounds, touch, smells and taste etc..

    I have no real intention of mixing such occasions TB/AB feelings with my DL feelings. It'll just put me off for an hour or so otherwise. Again, that'll upset me. I don't want that.



    Quote Originally Posted by secret101 View Post
    When I get out of college I plan on getting into the AB/DL world, mostly as a caretaker.
    But that is some years away, and I would probably meet them a couple of times at like a coffee shop or something before we even consider AB play. And even then we would probably have discussed our boundaries and what we expect from each other during the Ab time.

    my 2 dollars


    Quote Originally Posted by Peachy View Post
    Oh, and this is not the place to post warnings about not meeting up with people IRL...I said "meeting with someone you trust very much", so that's covered already.

    Peachy
    Nice to know people read posts carefully . But yeah. I think you missed the point. Don't worry. I had those days too.

  4. #4

    Default

    Cuddles, cuddles and more cuddles!
    For non-sexual AB play, for me it's all about being cute, and being loved.
    The actual activities aren't too important, as long as I'm being cared for.
    I guess being dressed up would be a major thing, as long as it was something cute. Obviously being put into a nappy.
    I like the idea of being bathed too, although I think in practice it would be too weird.
    Probably just being held would be a big thing.

    I couldn't do with babytalk though.
    I wouldn't like anything that I think of as sexual either, such as being dominated, or humiliated. So being made to do stuff, or being teased, or whatever... would be a turn-off because it would be a turn-on.

    For me, what must come from being cared for is: a feeling of comfort, a feeling of being loved, a feeling of being cute and a higher self image (which comes from the others). So I guess I'd expect a carer to try to achieve that.

    In that situation, I guess I'd be very nervous. I think that it would be very difficult to get into the AB frame of mind. I'd probably want to plan things beforehand, but then having things all planned out might make the experience less fun somehow.
    And then of course there's worry about the carer, are they enjoying themselves? Unless you enjoy being a carer yourself, it's probably quite difficult to understand what they get out of the experience. I think that I could act as a carer and enjoy it, but I think I'd still worry.
    I think to roleplay like this with somebody you would have to know that person very well, and especially what they like and don't like. The roleplay has to be a two way thing... which might be difficult since the nature of AB roleplay seems to be one person doing all the work and the other having everything done for them!

  5. #5

    Default

    I'm not so interested in carer, it doesn't appeal me.

    If I will have a carer, I want from her (not a guy) Love.
    The word carer make me think to someone who love you, someone who want to protect you.

  6. #6

    Default

    For me it would be cuddles, and huggles, kisses etc.

    Of course put into a diaper, just being taken care of, though I don't like humiliation or anything like that!

  7. #7

    Default

    I'd want someone who was mostly loving and gentle but also wasn't afraid to spank/scold if I acted out of line. Of course, I think it's important to communicate your feelings about this kind of thing in advance. If my caregiver tells me to pick up my toys and I stomp my feet and whine and pout, it's obvious I'm deliberately acting out, but what if I accidentally spill something at lunch? You have to make sure your caregiver knows what kind of reaction you want in that situation, or that you trust them enough to react appropriately and not seriously upset you.

    My main source of nervousness going into a situation like that would be the vulnerability. I've actually had a "daddy" before, for a short time, and it's a very vulnerable situation. You can really get hurt if things don't work out. So I'd be nervous that this person wouldn't understand the emotional commitment I was making. Plus I'd also be nervous about allowing myself to be cared for in such an intimate way. The whole idea of being naked for changings and baths is so much scarier than being naked in a sexual relationship. It would take me awhile to get past that nervousness.

  8. #8
    EmeraldsAndLime

    Default

    I suppose the core of it for me would just to have someone there looking after me. I don't fully regress, I honestly couldn't do that, but someone who'll come along and change me, tuck me in at night or just cuddle me when I'm feeling a little down.

    *shrugs*

  9. #9

    Default

    I think if I was in either the caregiver or the care recipient I would talk about it with the other person, or persons involved and come to an agreement on what would make everyone happy.

  10. #10

    Default

    Not so much being cared for, but carring for someone else would be cool.

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