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Thread: Transgender therapy

  1. #1

    Default Transgender therapy

    Alright, I want to see a therapist that specializes in transgender/transsexual issues, but I don't want my parents to find out just yet. Is there any way I can see one without my parents knowing? Or is there free online therapy for it?

    Please, I'm seriously considering a sex-change when I'm older and have enough money saved up (I'm gonna save up for precisely that), but I read that I have to take therapy first.

  2. #2

    Default

    To obtain the hormones in the future, you need to have a letter of authorization from a licensed therapist. So free online therapy probably wouldn't work, unfortunately.

    I am sure you can find a therapist that specializes in transgender department in your area (try google search) and attend without your parent knowledge for time being. Sadly it wouldn't not be free. There would be a lot of patience required if you decide to start the transition. Eventually, you have to reveal to your parents what you were doing and how you are feeling.

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by Emmy View Post
    To obtain the hormones in the future, you need to have a letter of authorization from a licensed therapist. So free online therapy probably wouldn't work, unfortunately.

    I am sure you can find a therapist that specializes in transgender department in your area (try google search) and attend without your parent knowledge for time being. Sadly it wouldn't not be free. There would be a lot of patience required if you decide to start the transition. Eventually, you have to reveal to your parents what you were doing and how you are feeling.
    I understand that I'll have to tell my parents sometime, but I just want to wait. There's a high chance that my dad will disown me if I tell my parents (my relationship with my dad isn't the best, but I still don't want to lose my dad). And I didn't realize that hormones where automatically part of the therapy, what else is in it?

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by Arcanine96 View Post
    I understand that I'll have to tell my parents sometime, but I just want to wait. There's a high chance that my dad will disown me if I tell my parents (my relationship with my dad isn't the best, but I still don't want to lose my dad). And I didn't realize that hormones where automatically part of the therapy, what else is in it?
    I do understand that. So I guess it would be the best to save up some money then start seeing therapy at age 16 or 17? Then by the time you are 18 and you are confident that you are transgender, then you can ask your therapist for letter of authorization and state that you have gender dysphoria. You can hand this letter to your doctor to obtain hormones and start hormones therapy. Your doctor can monitor your health and ensure nothing go wrong. Overdosing on hormones can be very dangerous, and some people are desperate enough to get them off black market and do it themselves without doctor supervision.

    Therapy would help you to determine what you really want, diagnosing you, give you letter of authorization, and also recommendation letter for surgery. For gender reassignment surgery (GRS), you need to be on hormones for at least 12 months; seeing therapist for 12 months; and verification of you doing RLE (Real Life Experience). RLE is a way to determine that you are comfortable blending into society as your desired gender (working as a female, going out everyday as a female etc). Form of verification would be letters from your employer, your therapist, your school teacher etc and stated how long you have been a female (must be at least 1 year).

  5. #5

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Emmy View Post
    I do understand that. So I guess it would be the best to save up some money then start seeing therapy at age 16 or 17? Then by the time you are 18 and you are confident that you are transgender, then you can ask your therapist for letter of authorization and state that you have gender dysphoria. You can hand this letter to your doctor to obtain hormones and start hormones therapy. Your doctor can monitor your health and ensure nothing go wrong. Overdosing on hormones can be very dangerous, and some people are desperate enough to get them off black market and do it themselves without doctor supervision.

    Therapy would help you to determine what you really want, diagnosing you, give you letter of authorization, and also recommendation letter for surgery. For gender reassignment surgery (GRS), you need to be on hormones for at least 12 months; seeing therapist for 12 months; and verification of you doing RLE (Real Life Experience). RLE is a way to determine that you are comfortable blending into society as your desired gender (working as a female, going out everyday as a female etc). Form of verification would be letters from your employer, your therapist, your school teacher etc and stated how long you have been a female (must be at least 1 year).
    Sorry, I don't mean to bombard you with questions, but

    1) What do the hormones do exactly? (You just give me a link, and I'll read it)

    2) Do I have to wait until my therapy begins to do the RLE?

  6. #6

    Default

    Nah, don't worry. I enjoy to help others and share my knowledge and experience. =)

    1) Yep, it will be too long for me to type up and explain everything. So here's the link for HRT (Hormones Replacement Therapy). This explains very well!

    2) You can start RLE before seeing therapist... it works fine too. Just that most transgender people usually prefer to talk with therapist then RLE to give some confidence, and allow time for hormones to take effect (they don't change overnight), and feminize the body a bit before going female full time. If you are so sure you can pass off as a female and blend okay into society, then go ahead. Ensure you have a school teacher to verify this and make sure that person are aware what you are doing so it's easier to keep track. Some therapists are okay with this, and some others prefer to start RLE on their count. It's really depends. If your therapist you will eventually see is okay with you already started with RLE as long as you have letter of proof then maybe it's slightly quicker for you to obtain hormones (if you are diagnosed and at least 3 months of). I hope this is clear for you to understand. I am bit tired at the moment. =P

  7. #7

    Default

    Ah this sounds like me 4 years ago. I will say that you need to think long, and hard about this because it is a HUGE decision.

    I was dead set on going through with it up until I was 17. I really wanted to, and still to this day if I got the opportunity I would go through with it. There are a few things you have to ask yourself though. Even after the hormones, and surgery do you believe you can pass for a woman? I know it doesn't matter to some people, but it did for me. I'm about 6' 2", a 3 foot shoulder span, can palm a basketball, have a men's 15 shoe size (17 in women's), and not to toot my own horn, but I am rather muscular. I couldn't see myself looking anything remotely close to a woman, which is one of the reasons I didn't go through with it.

    You were saying that you and your dad aren't very close. Another thing you have to look at is family and friends. There is a chance that they won't be accepting of this. My family is made up of rednecks, and bible thumpers, and my friends are mostly hicks. I wouldn't have a chance to explain myself before they hung me in the tree in the backyard.

    Another thing to look at is how people will treat you out in public. If you can't easily pass as a woman, are you prepared for awkward stares, people making fun of you, or possibly having to look really, really hard for a girlfriend/boyfriend. I know at the local Walmart out here, we actually have two transgendered women working as cashiers. I know anytime I'm standing in line while they're working I can hear people snickering, making fun of them, and see people pointing at both of them. Around Christmas time last year, I was standing in line while a woman burst out laughing after the transgendered cashier said "Hello", to her. For about a year there was actually a separate bathroom for them because neither the male or female workers wanted them to be in their bathrooms (now they have no say in the matter, equal rights and all).

    Lastly, the price. You can easily be looking at $20,000, and that is without all of the plastic surgery. You have to figure, there is the therapy, the actual sex reassignment surgery, the hormones, and possibly more just for the initial "setup". I'm not entirely sure, but I don't believe too many insurance companies will even pay a penny towards it. Then you also have the plastic surgery that no insurance company will pay for that can rack up tens of thousands of dollars.

    I'm not trying to convince you not to do it in any way. I just don't want to see you go through this and decide half way through that you don't want to do it anymore, which isn't exactly an option, or not being happy with yourself after you have gone through it completely.

    And Emmy, if anything in my post isn't 100% accurate, please correct me. The last time I researched this was about 2 years ago lol.

  8. #8

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Emmy View Post
    Nah, don't worry. I enjoy to help others and share my knowledge and experience. =)

    1) Yep, it will be too long for me to type up and explain everything. So here's the link for HRT (Hormones Replacement Therapy). This explains very well!

    I saw in the article that there are some side affects of the hormones. Have you had any, and what are the odds of them happening (I didn't see any odds)
    2) You can start RLE before seeing therapist... it works fine too. Just that most transgender people usually prefer to talk with therapist then RLE to give some confidence, and allow time for hormones to take effect (they don't change overnight), and feminize the body a bit before going female full time. If you are so sure you can pass off as a female and blend okay into society, then go ahead. Ensure you have a school teacher to verify this and make sure that person are aware what you are doing so it's easier to keep track. Some therapists are okay with this, and some others prefer to start RLE on their count. It's really depends. If your therapist you will eventually see is okay with you already started with RLE as long as you have letter of proof then maybe it's slightly quicker for you to obtain hormones (if you are diagnosed and at least 3 months of). I hope this is clear for you to understand. I am bit tired at the moment. =P
    I saw in the article that there are some side affects to the hormone replacement therapy. Have you had any, and what are the odds of them happening?

  9. #9

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Baby Nikki View Post
    Ah this sounds like me 4 years ago. I will say that you need to think long, and hard about this because it is a HUGE decision.

    I was dead set on going through with it up until I was 17. I really wanted to, and still to this day if I got the opportunity I would go through with it. There are a few things you have to ask yourself though. Even after the hormones, and surgery do you believe you can pass for a woman? I know it doesn't matter to some people, but it did for me. I'm about 6' 2", a 3 foot shoulder span, can palm a basketball, have a men's 15 shoe size (17 in women's), and not to toot my own horn, but I am rather muscular. I couldn't see myself looking anything remotely close to a woman, which is one of the reasons I didn't go through with it.

    You were saying that you and your dad aren't very close. Another thing you have to look at is family and friends. There is a chance that they won't be accepting of this. My family is made up of rednecks, and bible thumpers, and my friends are mostly hicks. I wouldn't have a chance to explain myself before they hung me in the tree in the backyard.

    Another thing to look at is how people will treat you out in public. If you can't easily pass as a woman, are you prepared for awkward stares, people making fun of you, or possibly having to look really, really hard for a girlfriend/boyfriend. I know at the local Walmart out here, we actually have two transgendered women working as cashiers. I know anytime I'm standing in line while they're working I can hear people snickering, making fun of them, and see people pointing at both of them. Around Christmas time last year, I was standing in line while a woman burst out laughing after the transgendered cashier said "Hello", to her. For about a year there was actually a separate bathroom for them because neither the male or female workers wanted them to be in their bathrooms (now they have no say in the matter, equal rights and all).

    Lastly, the price. You can easily be looking at $20,000, and that is without all of the plastic surgery. You have to figure, there is the therapy, the actual sex reassignment surgery, the hormones, and possibly more just for the initial "setup". I'm not entirely sure, but I don't believe too many insurance companies will even pay a penny towards it. Then you also have the plastic surgery that no insurance company will pay for that can rack up tens of thousands of dollars.

    I'm not trying to convince you not to do it in any way. I just don't want to see you go through this and decide half way through that you don't want to do it anymore, which isn't exactly an option, or not being happy with yourself after you have gone through it completely.

    And Emmy, if anything in my post isn't 100% accurate, please correct me. The last time I researched this was about 2 years ago lol.
    This is pretty accurate! =) I agree with you of what you said. My SRS costs $12,500 (in 2009) but it was covered by British Columbia government health ministry. =) I was very lucky! But anything else, I have to pay with my own money.



    Quote Originally Posted by Arcanine96 View Post
    I saw in the article that there are some side affects to the hormone replacement therapy. Have you had any, and what are the odds of them happening?
    Yes, major side effect is blood clot. It's usually caused by the estrogens pills. That's main reason why you need a doctor supervision to make sure things are okay. Blood clots can be anywhere. Fortunately, the chances for that is very slim as long as you are in safe dosage range. I never have medical problems from HRT. Also, liver will suddenly get more pills to process everyday, so doctor might need to make sure your liver are functioning correctly. Smoking or excess drinking aren't recommended (I don't do any of those). Doctor will take blood tests before you start HRT to make sure everything's okay.

    Other side effects would be moody swings. It will be noticeable after few months on HRT. I cry more easier and sometimes for silly reasons. After a long time on HRT, if I went off it for too long, I can get really moody and bitchy. =S This was proven when I had to get off hormones about few weeks prior to SRS (for safety reasons and reduce chances of blood clots). I was able to go back on couple of weeks after the surgery (so total bit over a month off hormones). Also, it's not recommended to be "on and off" with HRT since it can be dangerous if playing around with it and not good for body in long term.

  10. #10

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Emmy View Post
    This is pretty accurate! =) I agree with you of what you said. My SRS costs $12,500 (in 2009) but it was covered by British Columbia government health ministry. =) I was very lucky! But anything else, I have to pay with my own money.



    Yes, major side effect is blood clot. It's usually caused by the estrogens pills. That's main reason why you need a doctor supervision to make sure things are okay. Blood clots can be anywhere. Fortunately, the chances for that is very slim as long as you are in safe dosage range. I never have medical problems from HRT. Also, liver will suddenly get more pills to process everyday, so doctor might need to make sure your liver are functioning correctly. Smoking or excess drinking aren't recommended (I don't do any of those). Doctor will take blood tests before you start HRT to make sure everything's okay.

    Other side effects would be moody swings. It will be noticeable after few months on HRT. I cry more easier and sometimes for silly reasons. After a long time on HRT, if I went off it for too long, I can get really moody and bitchy. =S This was proven when I had to get off hormones about few weeks prior to SRS (for safety reasons and reduce chances of blood clots). I was able to go back on couple of weeks after the surgery (so total bit over a month off hormones). Also, it's not recommended to be "on and off" with HRT since it can be dangerous if playing around with it and not good for body in long term.
    So you're saying as long as I follow my prescription and continue to use it, I'll have very little chance of blood clots? I can handle the mood swings, I cry pretty easily anyway.

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