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Thread: Homemaking?

  1. #1

    Default Homemaking?

    See heres the thing, i know that for most people being a homemaker is a bad thing. But i just don't see that. I think that it would be great to be able to wake up in the morning make your husband/wife breakfast then see them off with a hug and a kiss. Then spend the morning doing all the little things that need doing. You could have whatever you want for lunch, i mean its not like you don't have time to practice cooking. Then in the afternoon you could do whatever, it would probably have to be chores but if you were to spend every morning of the week doing chores it would stand to reason that you would have some time free in the afternoon. Then your husband/wife would come home and you get to have dinner with them and spend some quality time together.

    Now i do realise that this sort of scenario is highly unlikely, but still it's a nice thought to have something similar. Anywho i think that a life like that would be great so here is my question What is it that people don't like when it comes to the homemaker life? It sounds great to me.

  2. #2


    I think it isn't so much people don't like the idea as they don't like the idea of being forced to be a homemaker. One of the side effects of contemporary Western society is the idea that one can and should have personal goals and ambitions. Very often those goals and ambitions are broader than just being the supporting cast for someone else.
    Personally, I have inherent problems with staying home and tending the lair, presupposing I've found someone to spend my life with. But, and I know you can't prove it around here, I am at heart an author. My greatest desires all revolve around writing and being published. I refuse to let anyone, no matter who, tell me that my only purpose in life is to clean house and make dinner.

  3. #3


    If this is not proof positive that more forums are needed, then may the saints preserve us. This thread belongs in the ‘Dreamer’s Forum’.

    Boho, who cares?
    A slight oversight on your part is that a homemaker per say, is surplus to requirements and is a waste of potential resources unless you are factoring in dependants (or whatever you care to call ‘sprog’s’ nowadays). I would advise in that case, that you keep this warped mindset to yourself and never share it with your SO and mother of your children, I’d fear that a great harm would certainly befall you.

    From the time you rise to the time you go to bed the kids are your first (collective) responsibility, so that’s fucked any notion of quality time with your SO. For all your practice with cooking and for as much as they love you, your kids will not eat the swill and will pointedly tell you ‘I don‘t like that’. When your two year old daughter calls you a ‘bitch’ during a public stand-up row, now there is quality time indeed. I can see that I’ve done enough damage as is, so I’ll refrain from hauling you over the coals for your assertion, that you could tidy up in a few minutes a house that’s put through the wars on a daily basis.

    For some obscure reason though, when I try to picture you in my minds eye, all I see is your pile of dirty laundry scattered over the bathroom floor. Dream on kiddo, and long may you never meet or know harsh reality in any shape or form. Sorry I could not have been of more help.

  4. #4


    I would love for my fiance to be able to stay home with my son and look after the house. She would love it too. Heck, I would stay home if I didn't make more money then she does, but there in lies the issue. Money. I don't live in a big house, and we budget ourselves carefully. We almost never go out to eat or to the movies or anyhting like that. If we do, we go for a cheap as we can.

    When her maternity leave is up, my fiance will have to go back to work. We are not at all sure what we will do with my boy yet, but we need two incomes. Maybe my fiance will work from home, but if she does, she's clearly not a homemaker. I don't think I'm unique here either. There are alot of people in the same boat as we are. The cost of living is getting insane, and wages are not going up enough to ballance it. More and more I think that the homemaker is going be be dying off for alot of families, simply out of economic need.

    This makes me very sad...

  5. #5


    Sounds awful - sorry.

    Homemaker?? no way.
    I mean, if you had like half a dozen kids to take care of and stuff like that, fine - there's hardly something else you could do.

    But I never got those couples, especially those without children where either one of them (mostly "her") is a homemaker and the other one goes to work 8am-5pm day after day.... bringin' home the money whilst the other one "just" keeps the house clean.

    I have a full time job and yet I manage to cook daily, keep my place in a damn fine shape, do the shopping and enjoy quality time.
    A couple - he's been a good friend of mine for a long time - is like the above, she's homemaking and he's working his butt of to bring in cash for two and give them luxury like holidays, art, stuff... whatever.
    She couldn't be any more bored out of her mind, their house, whilst lovely is still dirtier than my apartment usually gets...
    They both got quite obese over the years... and she sits home all day long waiting for him to come home.

    Don't people want their own life? their own real responsibilities, their own money?

    I always felt that those "homemakers" are living off the money of their "significant other".
    Sorry, unless you got a bunch of kids to take care of (that can be more than a full time job! hats off to anyone who manages...) you simply won't be "busy" enough with just the house...
    I mean at least find some work, part time... or start a home-business... whatever... but it's also a bit about self-esteem and self-respect and self-fulfillment.

    at least that's me.

  6. #6


    True that to the practical/financial problems, but even if it was possible. I don't think I'd want a housewife-wife, and I sure as hell don't wanna be the traditional (unseen) father figure. I am already in that I'm a total workaholic. So in the future it might be managable in terms of money but we would be doomed to fall into the familiar pattern where you slowly get alienated from each other because you lack common ground and the whole focus of your life is completely different. And having two incomes instead of one would still be nice, of course.

    so for me, a life like that would be nice, for a while.

  7. #7


    Don't get me wrong, I'm in better financial shape then alot of people out there. I own my house and car (or at least am able to make the payments), and we can afford to eat well. I just didn't want to leave that as a sob story. I was just pointing out I'm not out blowing my money on every little thing and living the high life, then whining about being broke.

    As for why having a stay at home parent (homemaker) would be awesome, well...

    If my fiance was able to stay home with our kid, we wouldn't have to pay the $800-$1000 a month for child care. Also, I could come home to dinner on the table and a clean house. That's not me being lazy (I would be the stay at home dad if I could), it means that all the time that I'm home can be spent enjoying my family and son, and not doing the little chores that need to be done.

    Even without a kid in the picture, having someone at home can be nice. I would love to come home after work and not have to deal with that stuff. As for the person at home; hobbies are important. lol

  8. #8


    From personal experience no I would not enjoy being a homemaker at all. I lived that way for two months not that we had kids but I'm in college and he worked all the time. I don't mind doing the simple stuff and i thoroughly enjoy cooking, but I hated being there all the time and having the same routine everyday when I knew I could be feeling more productive by working and still doing what I was doing. Sitting at home makes me feel lazy even though I'm doing all the chores, cooking, etc. it made me feel horribly lazy compared to his 6 days a week 10 to 12 hours a day job.

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