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Thread: Re-intro; a history of me

  1. #1

    Post Re-intro; a history of me

    I thought that since a bit about me has changed since I joined the site, and not everyone really KNOWS about me, it's time to join the herd and post a re-intro thread. This is all 100% true, but also very fucked up. If you don't want to read it, don't. It's partially to vent, but mostly just to explain a bit about me.

    Let's start with conception and birth. For starters, I'm a rape baby. Just getting that out there now. My father raped my mother (Though they were already married at the time), and I was eventually born. I was born in February during the year 1995, pre-mature, small, and sick. I was born with a few birth defects; one of them affecting me chest, another affecting my heart, and a few other smaller, less serious things. One other big thing was that I was fully pre-mature, and thus, needed to be pumped with steroids as a baby. One of the bigger things was that my stomach was SEVERELY fucked up; and every time I ate (Technically drank, since I was still a baby and needed milk at the time) I wound up projectile vomiting across the room.

    Finally, I matured and got older. My mother and father fought a lot when I was little. My mother eventually got pregnant with my brother Joeseph... I wasn't very happy about that. My mother has explained to me on several occasions that I was VERY mad that I was getting a baby brother. Whilst still pregnant, my mother divorced my father after a night I still surprisingly remember... which is weird and fucking scary in and of itself, but whatever. My dad pushed my mom (pregnant) down a flight of stairs, whilst I was tied up to a chair with my mouth duck-taped and put in a closet for an evening.

    My mom divorced my dad and we moved around a bit. We settled back on the island when I was 3. I met a friend named Derek, and my brother was born. Nothing really special happened until I was 6, which is when I was finally fucking potty trained. This of course hadn't happened yet because I was always in shitty situations, and never really in a stable place for a while. As such; potty training was out of the question until that point. I took to it quick, and was soon potty trained. At this point, my mom re-married to my step dad, whom I love very much.

    My mom then got prego again, this time with my half-brother wayne Jr. He was born, shit went on. Went through elementary school... bullying started in 3'rd grade. I was the sheltered type due to my mom trying to keep my constantly happy and sheltered from the world falling down around me; I wasn't able or very capable with dealing with that shit. There's 1000 stories I could tell. How I nearly got into a bat fight (Baseball bat fight, that is), how I got stalked home and jumped and had to call the cops, but I'll leave that for another day and place.

    During all of this time, I was experimenting with baby stuff. Yuppers, stealing diapers from my brothers, loving other baby stuff, taking naps, ETC ETC. When I was about 10 years old (5'th grade), I found a site about digimon and pokemon revolving around infantilistic ideas. I found the term *TB* on there, figured out that it was the term that explained what I like... and then told my parents. I got nearly fucked up verbally, occasionally physically by my mom and step dad for it. The most infamous of these incidents was when my dad took a chair and threw it at me... not very fun.

    My BIO-DAD at this time was just setting me up for more disaster. He married an ex-drunk, she failed at STAYING an ex-drunk, and I never saw my dad again. Told us he loved us (me and my brother joe) and never called again. To this day, we still don't know where he currently lives.

    Next up is middle school. Cliques were formed, and I was left out. I had a small group of friends; Derek, who was a friend of mine I had re-discovered after not seeing him for quite a few years, and a few other people. I suppose you could say I fell head over heals for this girl Nichole... she fucked me over. We went out for a bit, she broke it off, I wrote her a love note, she copied said love note and distributed it out to the rest of the school. OF COURSE; the school was doing little about my still persistent and now VERY violent bullying situation. I was getting bullied very physically at this point. I was getting jumped once a week, had shit thrown at me in the halls, comments in class; that kind of shit.

    Moved to arizona for a few months, then came back to do the latter half of my 8'th grade year in NY. 9'th grade came around, and I got very sick. I had mono, my birth-defects were coming back into severity to haunt me and slowly kill me, ETC ETC. The only good thing that came out of this was my new outlook on life; which would later be somewhat changed yet again. That outlook led me to be able to get my parents to let me be a TB within my own room without them freaking out.

    Now it's 10'th grade... not much has changed. I'm a writer now, I suppose. I'm well known on a couple of sites, but I'm still unpopular in real life. Still abused physically and emotionally the second I walk into school; I still haven't talked to my bio-dad, not to mention I seem to destroy everything that I constantly try to build up... but yeah, that's about it. I'll assume you all DIDN'T enjoy reading that, so I won't say 'hope you enjoyed' or something ironically stupid like that.

    -Mikey

    EDIT: OH! And just to make sure I cover 't3h rulz' of this area:

    Hobbies are:

    Reading
    Writing
    Playing WoW
    Drawing sometimes
    Last edited by LeonSoryu117; 04-Jan-2011 at 22:02.

  2. #2

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    While I don't find hardly any of that pleasant(obviously it isn't), it was interesting to read and pretty deep..That is a fucked up childhood and no one should have to go through anything like that so I really feel for you. :| I was always a bully killer in school so I've seen the mean shit bullies do..I don't really know you, but living a life with the crappy quality that yours has and continuing to go on takes a tremendous amount of strength. But you did say you're popular on some sites and everything so you probably don't need this, but if you ever need another friend I'm here. :3

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by Coritou View Post
    While I don't find hardly any of that pleasant(obviously it isn't), it was interesting to read and pretty deep..That is a fucked up childhood and no one should have to go through anything like that so I really feel for you. :| I was always a bully killer in school so I've seen the mean shit bullies do..I don't really know you, but living a life with the crappy quality that yours has and continuing to go on takes a tremendous amount of strength. But you did say you're popular on some sites and everything so you probably don't need this, but if you ever need another friend I'm here. :3
    When I say other sites, I really only mean one... and it's a very small part on one... that's not very active... *sighs*

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mikeru117 View Post
    When I say other sites, I really only mean one... and it's a very small part on one... that's not very active... *sighs*
    Eh..shouldn't matter too much, from what I've read you're a pretty good write and that can take you far. And in the future, far away from the shitty parts of your life. Even though your childhood can have a big impact on your entire life, it still is a very small portion of your life and your future holds many better days.

  5. #5

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    That does a provide a lot of perspective; you have a pretty complex personality, after all. Thank you for being honest, Mikeru. What's strange to me, though, is that you don't really seem to be the kind of guy who'd get bullied a lot, at least not from the personality you show online. I won't propose to have any sort of advise for you -- even with what you've provided I wouldn't feel that I know enough about your situation. But I do have a soft spot in my heart for kids who get pushed around in school. I was just lucky that around my parts, people were more bark than bite. Still, they barked an awful lot... freakin' Long Islanders @[email protected]

  6. #6

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    Well Mikeru117 ,it sounds like you have had more than your fair share of crap in your life too and I do feel for you because I know what you have went thru and more ,I have been beat with every thing under the sun by my birthmother ,sexually abused by her along with all the brain washing and emotional abuse she did to me while keeping me in diapers and making me do things that only a baby would have to do. If i could have my life to do over I would in a minute and wish I had been raised more normally . I see you are still a teenager so I only ask that you try to see past your years and see that others have dealt with what you have and more please. Keep doing the things you love and and just try to be a better person in this world and you will have a great life.
    Have a good day ,ozarkbaby

  7. #7

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    It certainly wasn't a pleasant read, but interesting none the less. I already knew quite a bit of what you've written here, but to be honest some of it really shocked and saddened me (particularly the night that lead to your parent's divorce).

    I'm not much good at cheering people up, nor am I the psychoanalyst type. What I will say is that I do hope that you will, sooner rather than latter, be able to break free of the violent environment in which you grew up and find an happy place in this world, a place where you can be yourself in (relative) peace. I'm afraid I lack the real life experience to give you any meaningful tips, and I know you hate it when people say things will get better, but things will get better.

    ~~Near

  8. #8

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    Look forward to your graduation. Life beyond high school is amazing, and kids often get tunnel vision, failing to see the wider world.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by slim View Post
    That does a provide a lot of perspective; you have a pretty complex personality, after all. Thank you for being honest, Mikeru. What's strange to me, though, is that you don't really seem to be the kind of guy who'd get bullied a lot, at least not from the personality you show online. I won't propose to have any sort of advise for you -- even with what you've provided I wouldn't feel that I know enough about your situation. But I do have a soft spot in my heart for kids who get pushed around in school. I was just lucky that around my parts, people were more bark than bite. Still, they barked an awful lot... freakin' Long Islanders @[email protected]
    Yeah, pretty much dude...

  10. #10

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    It's kinda hard to read your story, no one should go through that crap you lived.
    How old are you? I am from Mexico so I don't know how grades are divided over at the US :3
    but hey, life won't always be a bitch, cheer up and think on the future :3 *hugs*

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