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Thread: expressing fustration and coping

  1. #1

    Default expressing fustration and coping

    Hopefully this is okay in this area as it touches alittle on incontinence but also other things.

    I find it really hard to deal with coping sometimes and i suppose i was just curious to see if others on here can relate. I suffer from cronic backpain which i have been long term medicated for due to a childhood injury. Between the pressure to fit in, the constant back pains, the incontinence, the lack of mobility and just my racing teenage emotions sometimes i just get so fustrated i want to scream or other times ill just want to cry. I know im not very good at venting my emotions and i am kinda shy when im out from behind my laptop so its very difficult for me to communicate my feelings to my family so typically i bottle it up. I have had many a crying-pillows or comfort plushies throughout the years to comfort me at night as coping tools but even so its always been very difficult.

    I suppose my question is rather personal but im curious as to how others approach their own situations and how they handle it. I know my new-found support system is being a TB and releasing my emotions through the role of it but i wonder what others feel. Oh, and music too ^^;

    Im not sure if theres exactly a different topic like this as i am somewhat new to the site but if there is im sorry.

    anyways yea.

  2. #2

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    Hey, I don't have it anything as bad as you, and I'm not inco, but I do have ME, which means I can get really tired really easily, I'll sleep for 12 or 14 or more hours, and still be barely able to get out of bed to even brush my teeth. It annoys me because doing anything really hurts me, but my brain still works well! Sometimes I just SCREAM! to deal with it.

    As for the teenage emotions, I think I'm a bit past that, but I do have crazy pill-enduced hormones racing through my body every month so I feel your pain on that one!

    Generally screaming works best for me! But I'd be interested to hear anyone elses coping ideas as well!

  3. #3

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    I can relate to how you feel talula, i have to take sleeping medication to help me get to sleep. My symptoms and the effects of that plus my other issues link alot to some of your side effects but on a different scale. I tend to have very restless nights and it usually takes me like 2 hours to do the "get out of bed" phase and usually my mom helps me with that. Its almost like your having to hold up the sky. I only seem to actually get between 4 and 7 hours of sleep a night though depending on how i do, 5ish is generally my average, i only push 7 if i have a bad night the day before. Also, because of my lack of sleep im groggy all day and i get tired really easilly just like you. I think screaming is definitly a good outburst of emotion but always do it in a pillow >_> or else your family thinks something bad happend. LoL i know << i freaked my parents out afew times.

  4. #4

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    I normally do it in the woods near my house. Normally I can do the walk there and then just SCREAM!!!!

  5. #5

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    Ahh, no fair, my mobility is limited and i cant really escape my family without one tagging along.... :3 ~could also be listed as a reason of personal fustration lol~

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by nanamew View Post
    Hopefully this is okay in this area as it touches alittle on incontinence but also other things.

    I find it really hard to deal with coping sometimes and i suppose i was just curious to see if others on here can relate. I suffer from cronic backpain which i have been long term medicated for due to a childhood injury. Between the pressure to fit in, the constant back pains, the incontinence, the lack of mobility and just my racing teenage emotions sometimes i just get so fustrated i want to scream or other times ill just want to cry. I know im not very good at venting my emotions and i am kinda shy when im out from behind my laptop so its very difficult for me to communicate my feelings to my family so typically i bottle it up. I have had many a crying-pillows or comfort plushies throughout the years to comfort me at night as coping tools but even so its always been very difficult.

    I suppose my question is rather personal but im curious as to how others approach their own situations and how they handle it. I know my new-found support system is being a TB and releasing my emotions through the role of it but i wonder what others feel. Oh, and music too ^^;

    Im not sure if theres exactly a different topic like this as i am somewhat new to the site but if there is im sorry.

    anyways yea.
    I fought for many years with debilitating headaches in addition to my incontinence. Dealing with the problems that we face is very difficult as it is hard for those around us who do not suffer from a similar fate cannot sympathize with what we are fighting. It is understandable--how do you try to understand what someone is feeling when what they feel is constant pain? Chronic pain seriously jades your view on life.

    On top of that, those around us cannot fathom how deeply the pain affects each of us. To me, it was not just what I suffered, but also what I put my wife and kids through on a regular basis and how it affected them. I cried myself to sleep many nights through the pain, and had a hard time pouring out my emotions to those around me; almost nobody truly understood what I fought.

    Online, whether here or in other forums, we can find similar individuals that share a commonality with us. Either chronic pain or incontinence is not something often brought up when talking in 'polite' conversation. But here, we find friends who also know the trials we face, and share in a place designed to discuss these matters. It does help to know you are not alone in this world with the challenges you face.

    I too have found comfort and support in choosing to accept my diapers and even becoming an AB. Going back to a 'little' in my mind allows me to feel like this is not something that should not be. Additionally, it allows me to find a way to re-do a part of my life that I felt was not how it should have been, to let my child inside finally enjoy what was supposed to be a good time.

    I know others find being *B lets them re-live the easier, less stressful times in their lives when the responsibility and roles were easier. Each of us has our own internal feelings with what we find.

    As for music, I have always found music to be a comfort to me. Lately, when I spent a week hospitalized to get my headaches controlled and had to go off heavy doses of pain medication cold turkey, music was my way of getting through the hell of detox. Certain songs can often have lyrics that are very applicable to whatever challenge you face, and will make it that much easier.

    Good luck, we're here for support if you need it.

  7. #7
    Kinglelouch

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    i know what thats like. unforunnutly i cut, draw, stop eating and stop eating to cope. its only made things worse and its a very difficult hole to climb out of

  8. #8
    Butterfly Mage

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    Nanamew: It's off-topic a bit, but I have to say that you have one of the most adorable avatars I've seen in quite a while

    I can relate to your frustration with injuries. I get periodic weakness in my extremities, tremors, and the sensation of phantom pins sticking at me. But the diving accident could have been worse -- so much worse. I'm not confined to a wheelchair and am generally healthy. A bit of mild incontinence isn't the end of the world when compared to the worst-case scenario.

  9. #9

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    *blush* thanks butterfly, its a charat and i really enjoy the picture too.

    First i just wanna say thanks for all these super nice responces. Also, i want to say that i really respect what your feelings are and the pains you have gone through as well. I remember when i first discovered this fetish a short time ago i was scared but moreso i was unsure that anyone would have gone through alot of the same things as me and you are nearly coming from the exact same position i am. I feel the same way about the gaps in my childhood and i can also relate to the extreme detox and the heavy effects of medication. Technically speaking i am a functional drug addict due to the stuff im on if you wanna look at it that way haha ((med shelf is under lock and key of my parents)) :3 but yea so i can definitly relate to the detox too.

    I also think its very brave of you to mention that stuff kinglelouch, i know alot of people out there have ways of coping that are detrimental to their health in physical ways and its even more difficult to share because of negative stigmas around it but i really hope that a warm feeling comes from everyone having a chance to share and that we can maybe look at our selves and atleast know that were not alone. ^^

  10. #10

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    Nanamew, I can't honestly say I understand your physical pain because I don't and I'm not going to lie and act like I know what you're going through because I know I never have experienced what you're dealing with on a physical level, but as far as dealing with the stresses of being a teenager and trying to fit in, I'm right there with you on that. We as a community will be right there to support you if you need it.

    I know this isn't everyone's "thing", but I cope through writing in order to deal with my anxiety, depression and anger issues. Not any specific subject, but just pure, deep, personal thoughts. It's an odd experience to read your own thoughts once they're on paper, but it's very refreshing. That being said, most of the time I never save it, just read it through a few times and then delete it. It's something to try.



    Quote Originally Posted by Kinglelouch View Post
    i know what thats like. unforunnutly i cut, draw, stop eating and stop eating to cope. its only made things worse and its a very difficult hole to climb out of
    I used to do this and just from my experiences, I would recommend (as in you totally don't have to, but it's a suggestion from someone who did this for years) stop cutting before you actually hurt yourself irreversibly. However, I do understand the physical and emotional release that cutting provides. It's a very difficult hole to get out of as you said, and my only real advice is to have a heart to heart with someone about what and how you're feeling (and I know that is the most cliche thing to say, but it was honestly a last ditch effort on my part to find a "healthier" way to cope with my frustrations and it happened to work)

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