Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: Worried about things overwhelming you

  1. #1
    JamieGboy

    Default Worried about things overwhelming you

    Well first things first I want to establish that I am not some teenage disaster that is claiming he wants to take himself out of the world because the stress of forgetting to do his homework is just too much. Here is the real thing that I wanted to discuss, When posting on a thread about purges in the Teen Baby Forums. I realized that my purges have become even more stressful with each one that hits me and its seems to grow and grow. I am a Teen baby flat out and I have known that now for about 2 years, ive been into diapers in some sort for roughly 4-5 years. One reason that I really enjoy being a teen baby is that it really allows me to get away from everything and enjoy something that not only is enjoyable but usually a stress reliever for me. The issue comes down to feeling bad about being a teen baby and I know I am not the only one that feels this way. Most often it hits me when I am out enjoying normal things like hanging out with friends, playing soccer, or working on indie films (hobby of mine). When I am out enjoying these things I feel guilty for enjoying Diapers and such, often when I do have diapers it leads to a purge which leads to guilt. Every time that I do this I feel like I really just need to stop all of this and get out while I still can. I often throw away what little baby stuff I have and also try to lock myself out of my e-mails and Tb website accounts. Then sometimes a day later, sometimes a week, sometimes 2 months later I just come back and start all over. This is the first time ive been on ADISC but I feel safer here and like people care so I bring my issue here. Im afraid that the stress will just build up to be too much, when I was in middle school I was very close to cutting and when I got caught with being a TB, I considered suicide. I really dont have those impulses anymore but im afraid I might fall back into things. Not nessicarly cutting or suicide...just maybe making poor choices to replace things. I am in highschool now and ive done a little drinking and ive smoked about 3 ciggerates ever and that was only because i was at warped tour. To be honest I suppose this is more of just a rant when I really get down to it but any suggestions from more weathered TBs, ABs, ect.

  2. #2

    Default

    you need to get to a point in your life where you fully love and accept your self for who you are....that only comes through time and lots of heartache....you purge out of guilt and shame....and because the world tells you you cant be who you are and part of the world.....i feel for you even though i have never purged before because i havent always loved and accepted my self for who i am.....i didnt fully do that until a bout a month ago when i finally admitted i was gay....you will get there it just takes time....as cliche and sappy as this sounds i will still say it: its okay to be who you are its ok to like diapers its okay to want to be a baby....it shouldnt be your whole life and since its not you arent harming your self or any one else.....

  3. #3

    Default

    Jeez, kid. Sorry you have such a tough go of it. I know you said you aren’t that bad at the moment, but that still sucks. However, this is normal. Maybe not the extreme part at the end about wanting to end it, but the rest of your feelings are. Trust me, I’ve gone through the same things. Still do, although to a lesser extent.

    There is nothing wrong with you. That is the first thing you have to believe. As much as you can, drill that into your mind. Constantly. You are not a terrible person for wanting to regress at times. Nor are you a terrible person for still liking grown up things. There is nothing wrong with liking both. Guilt will come with this for many. Kind of a packaged deal.

    We are taught from an early age that we must hurry and “grow up”. I think that was my parent’s favorite catch phrase. Everyone around us is drilling this thought into our minds. We have learned to be ashamed of doing juvenile things from a young age, with most probably starting this with potty training. If you went in the toilet you were a good girl/boy. If you used your pants, you were a baby, and being a baby was bad. Don’t you want to be a big girl/boy? Sure you do.

    After that came other things. Cartoons soon became too juvenile, “playing” became something that only little kids do, etc. Everything in our society says that growing up and maturing is a good thing and going backwards, if even for a little bit, is shameful and wrong. We’ve all learned this from such an early age that it is next to impossible to just forget about it and be cool with what we like. The shame still creeps up on us. “Why do I want to sit and pee all over myself in diapers while watching cartoons when my friends are all out dating/drinking/partying/having business meetings, etc?”


    This is not to say that you can’t do/enjoy those things too. It’s simply the fact that you also take comfort in regressing to an earlier state every once and a while that is the problem. Anything too young for you is bad. You are a bad girl/boy. You should feel ashamed. Even if no one is around, those voices/thoughts echo in your mind.

    Purges stem from that guilt you feel from this. If you get rid of everything, you can get rid of those feelings of shame and guilt you have. Not having these things around puts them out of your mind. Of course, that doesn’t work for a lot of people. They find the desire to regress comes back. Just because you threw out your stuff, doesn’t mean you threw out your feelings too.

    As far as suggestions on how to stop being that way, I’m not sure. It all depends on the person. You have to keep thinking to yourself that it is ok how you feel. Strike a balance between the adult stuff and the baby stuff. If you focus too much on either one and how it is better for you than the other, you will end up purging, feeling guilty, etc. Next time you are ready to throw everything out, stop. Take a deep breath. Sit down on your bed, a chair, whatever. Just somewhere you can relax. Clear your mind and calm down. Most often, purges are done when you are feeling at your worst (at least for me) and when you calm down, you feel differently, although that might not be for a few days, weeks, or months at worst. When you feel you can think about the pros and cons rationally, do so. Think about how much money you might be wasting as well. Then come to a decision and follow through, knowing this is what you really want and not just a temporary reaction.

    I’m glad you got away from those suicidal impulses. If you ever feel yourself thinking that way, again, stop. Take a deep breath and try to relax. You are probably not thinking rationally. If you can’t calm down, call a friend, parent, trusted person, etc. If you aren’t comfortable telling them why, just talk about things. Anything, preferably a subject you normally enjoy. Having someone there or hearing someone’s voice helps. Being alone like that is not what you or anyone in that state of mind needs. Stay on the phone until you feel better. If you don’t feel better, take it to the next step and call a hotline or even an emergency number. You don’t want to play around and wait for your mind to get any worse.

    I know you aren’t feeling this right now, but it never hurts to be prepared. Hopefully it won’t ever happen again.

    Stress is an evil beast that can eat you alive, don’t take it lightly. Little stresses may be nothing by themselves, but they can add up or make a big stress that much bigger. If doing the TB thing helps, there is nothing wrong with that. You need to find ways to relieve your stress and having your stress relief turn into a stressor itself isn’t what you or anyone else needs.

    I am constantly worried about being overwhelmed. I have big stress issues and I get panic attacks if I don’t manage stress well. It’s all about prioritization and taking things as they come, not dwelling too much and not thinking about too much all at once.

    Remember, breathe. Stop and breathe.

  4. #4

    Default

    You have nothing to feel guilty about. Everyone else (the "normal" people) should feel guilty for the, often hypocritical, way this subject is treated. Sadly, that's probably not going to happen... but you can wish for it because it doesn't make it any less true. Doesn't mean you have to feel like you're doing something wrong. You are not doing anything wrong at all by being yourself. Diapers and babyish things are harmless. You are only hurting yourself by disposing of things during purges.



    Quote Originally Posted by waslost1234abc View Post
    you need to get to a point in your life where you fully love and accept your self for who you are....that only comes through time and lots of heartache....you purge out of guilt and shame....and because the world tells you you cant be who you are and part of the world.....i feel for you even though i have never purged before because i havent always loved and accepted my self for who i am.....i didnt fully do that until a bout a month ago when i finally admitted i was gay....you will get there it just takes time....as cliche and sappy as this sounds i will still say it: its okay to be who you are its ok to like diapers its okay to want to be a baby....it shouldnt be your whole life and since its not you arent harming your self or any one else.....
    Very true, but... what do you do when you just can't be yourself? Sometimes you fall into a state of not even being sure who "yourself" is anymore. =\
    Last edited by ShippoFox; 16-Aug-2010 at 23:31.

  5. #5

    Default

    I recently went to the Doctor for lack of sleep and he recommended Melatonin, you can pick it up at any health food store and it's completely natural. He showed me a link for a great website, if you can ship stuff to your house without your parents freaking out, try this out. 3mg is usually the best. Dunno if it helps.
    Melatonin Supplements | Puritan's Pride

  6. #6

    Default

    When I was in high school and college, the purges came a lot harder than they do now. Maybe living in New York or New Jersey, where I'm from, has a contributing factor. Growing up in N. J., everything seemed to center around being a man and being tough. I got into a lot of fights. I felt like I constantly had to prove myself. I weight lifted and played sports, swore like a sailor, drank, smoked, came home and wet my pants. Which activity seems out of place?

    Trying to live with that conflict was very difficult, and I hated myself for being compulsive about doing these "baby" activities, and wanting to feel like a baby while I did them. Then came the sexual relief, and then the guilt and self hate, plus no understanding why I was compelled to travel that road.

    Eventually I came to accept myself, in part by realizing that I didn't have to be tough in front of others. Eventually I learned that strength comes from a much deeper center, and manifests itself in more important and meaningful ways. I think you will eventually get there. If the stress is too much, think about getting professional help. By my senior year I had a shrink. Like others have said, sometimes we have to find someone to talk this out. It would be impossible for me to find a friend and say, I have this problem...., so usually we find a psychologist or a psychiatrist, though they can be expensive.

    Remember that we are here for you. We are first and foremost, a help group, so don't hesitate to either start threads like this, or pm members that you feel you trust or have made some sort of contact. Many of our members talk to me. I'm always here.

  7. #7

    Default

    I apologize if my thread brought bad feelings to you again. I was in a very poor mood when I made it and needed to lean on this community a bit while I worked on the problem IRL.

    About my situation:


    I know you probably thought of this and don't think it will help; because that is how I was when I made the purge thread too. Go hang out with some friends and have a good time, If you read my spoiler then you know how much it helped me with this. I think the trick to handling purges is not to try to hide from the world during them but rather embrace it and live life to the fullest.

Similar Threads

  1. Swine flu, are you worried?
    By Daisuke in forum Mature Topics
    Replies: 62
    Last Post: 30-May-2009, 09:09
  2. Slightly Worried
    By Tommy in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 29-Apr-2008, 00:11

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
ADISC.org - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community.
ADISC.org is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.