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Thread: I think I may have figured out why I'm AB, has anyone else?

  1. #1

    Default I think I may have figured out why I'm AB, has anyone else?

    I think I have figured out why I'm AB...

    I blame a lot of it on my not so happy childhood...
    First, being born blind and having 53 surgeries to give me about 5% vision in my right eye (they couldn't do anything with the left) and hundreds of trips to doctors trying to figure out what was wrong with me for the first 8 years of life didn't help. During this time my extreme sensitivity to light and the pain of my dying left eye made it hard for me to go places and it also effected my sinuses which caused constant runny nose and dozens of ear infections; so many that I have lost 20% of my hearing in my left ear. These problems, combined with my shyness and great love of music made school extremely difficult. I was picked on and made fun by students and the teachers ether didn't know how to help me or want to help me or tried too hard to help. I got an artificial eye when i was 8 and some things started to get better; my eyes didn't hurt much anymore and I didn't have ear or sinus problems either. But eventually school got so bad that I dropped out after 9th grade after the school suggested I didn't come back because they didn't have time to enlarge my worksheets and my mother said she'd help they said no and accused her of cheating help me pass.

    Ever since then things have gotten better in some ways but not in others

    People still treat me different. When I'm in public I hod onto someone's shoulder to get around and if it's a guy people look at you and either say rude thing about me being either drunk or gay and that pisses me off because I'm neither. When I meet people, half of them talk real slow and loud to me and act like I'm retarded or something and I get mad and say something like "If you had a blindfold on, would you be a dumbass and need people to talk to you like that?"

    Since my band went full time 5 years ago things have gotten a bit stressful. I have to deal with a bunch of people with their problems and egos, asshole club owners and the lack of money that we make among many other normal band things like busy schedules.

    Anyway, I think the reason I'm AB is because I need to feel loved and protected and innocent while also acting out a normal childhood and to cope with the stress of the band, loneliness and emotional scars from my nine years of school and my anger towards people who aren't even willing to understand.

    Anyway, sorry to ramble but I've been down lately had to get that off my chest. Anyone else know why they're AB/DL?

  2. #2

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    Damn that's rough man! I think that you are forced to be a strong person emotionally and mentally and I think you've earned the right to have those AB feelings.

  3. #3

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    I'm a TB because I like to act like a little kid. It's just as simple as that. I don't really understand why everyone searches for why they are what they are. In my opinion, it's really kind of pointless. It's just like asking yourself why you like to eat chicken. You like to eat chicken because you like the way it tastes.

    Sorry if I come off kind of strong.

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lizzie View Post
    I'm a TB because I like to act like a little kid. It's just as simple as that. I don't really understand why everyone searches for why they are what they are. In my opinion, it's really kind of pointless. It's just like asking yourself why you like to eat chicken. You like to eat chicken because you like the way it tastes.

    Sorry if I come off kind of strong.
    You have a good point her. I think it is same her i like the diaper feeling and i like nice print on my clothes. Lick lots of color and stuff like that.

  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lizzie View Post
    I'm a TB because I like to act like a little kid. It's just as simple as that. I don't really understand why everyone searches for why they are what they are. In my opinion, it's really kind of pointless. It's just like asking yourself why you like to eat chicken. You like to eat chicken because you like the way it tastes.

    Sorry if I come off kind of strong.
    I would have to strongly disagree. There are a lot of childhood emotional and developmental issues and experiences that may have caused some of us to gain or be directed into our AB/TB/DL tendencies are I believe this strongly. I am a person who understands that Psychology is a pseudoscience, but it is a study that should not and cannot be dismissed and should not be overlooked in some of our cases, including my own.

  6. #6

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by Pikachu View Post
    What sort of thing have you in mind?
    OMG your new avi looks SOO cute!!! And the reason I'm a TB/DL (just an educated guess based on the internet) is because my parent potty-trained me too early

  8. #8

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    i think that i know mine too...

    my dad died when i was little (please no pity posts! they're obnoxious, and Ive already moved on), and i have a younger brother, so, i guess that I've always acted fatherly towards him... treat him like i was his father (i am substantially older, though...), but i've always acted this way, and i guess my DL side is balancing it out... perhaps it goes deeper, but IDK... maybe i'll think of something better later...

  9. #9

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    This topic comes up time and again, and we always have some members who had very good childhoods, and others who had bad ones. I was adopted at the age of two. I'm sure I spent some time living in an adoption orphanage. My guess is that potty training was probably poorly done, not to mention that I didn't have a mother who loved me. Once I was adopted, all of that changed, though I don't remember my potty training.

    My guess is that we all have different experiences that cover a wide spectrum. Some things are better accepted without the encumbrance of trying to understand why. Of course, if we like diapers because we were mistreated as a child, or were unloved, that would give us a free pass, so to speak, to wear diapers without guilt or shame. Maybe that's what we all seek.

  10. #10
    Asher

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    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    My guess is that we all have different experiences that cover a wide spectrum. Some things are better accepted without the encumbrance of trying to understand why. Of course, if we like diapers because we were mistreated as a child, or were unloved, that would give us a free pass, so to speak, to wear diapers without guilt or shame. Maybe that's what we all seek.
    Dogboy, I've told you 'I love you,' right? :P

    As for why I am the way I am - to put it simply, I don't know for sure. I had a rough start, and I was potty trained late because of it. Along with that and a possible biological factor, I think that is why I am a DL. My history teacher used to say how, "The world isn't black or white; it is more of a gray." I believe that saying can be applied here; what causes one to be an AB or a DL is more of a mix of factors in our lives rather than just one thing.

    I'm sorry to hear about your hardships, but it seems that you are definitely doing the best you can do with handling your situation.

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