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Thread: Proud of myself

  1. #1

    Default Proud of myself

    I ask of you all to read this please ^-^;;
    and share an opinion =o


    I think You all should be proud of me for what I am about to write =D

    Sila taught me some wonderful things that honestly I can't come to think anybody else has ever taught me..

    The real meaning of being IN love..
    The true meaning of understanding and accepting somebody for who they are

    The real face of innocence everybody wishes they can find..

    I can say.. I have been there.. done that.. felt that.. said that..
    even swore that!..

    But not once at that time did I feel it as strong as I do now >.>;

    Its a kind of breathtaking experience to watch everything you have ever wanted unfold before your very eyes..

    She hid in the background.. guiding me through life
    standing next to me like a sister, helping me anyway she can..
    she sat there and watched as I fell in love with people.. listened to my stories.. listened as I told her things I thought were true, she even supported me in every relationship i decided to endure.. gave advice.. Unconditionally, cared about what I wanted.. and supported me in what I did.. even tho deep inside, she was missing something, it didn't matter to her whether she was alone.. or hurt.. no..
    when Bobkitty wanted her.. she was the friend to come to..

    I can't believe its taken me years to realize that all along.. she held inside her what I was looking for inna woman.. she was just to shy to come to the open about it
    that all along.. My best friend, the girl I knew longer then anybody online.. was secretly the girl I was lookin for..

    But fate knew I wasn't ready.. and neither was she.. it put me through all the steps of life.. the heartbreaks the.. lessons. the hurt.. the pain.. the losses..
    and fate also.. allowed Sila to watch as I went through it all
    throughout the years.. Sila learned stuff about me that you just can't put in words.. its a sorta Subconscious teaching..
    and it made what we are today.. and the reasons why what I say are true today..

    I finally learned how it is to be IN love.. and not just in love with a quality..
    or infatuated with somebodies better traits
    Try actually being in love with something that the person thought was their WORST trait?.. yeah.. its amazing >.>;

    I finally learned that sex is never the answer.. nor is a requirement in any way.. expect for Personal reasons.. and extreme circumstances..
    In this relationship with Sila, I have learned that sex really is the least on my mind.. and its not cause i'm not attracted to her appearance.. its because i know to love her truly i didn't hafta be sexually attracted to her.. to be honest tho.. i am sexually attracted to Sila.. but to explain that would be very hard.. and intrusive to our privacy.. but i'm just go out and say Sila has a very special thing about her that i want to cherish for as long as possible <3

    I finally Understand what love songs REALLY MEAN..

    I say I love you.. and each time I do.. my spine tingles..
    and I get chills...
    never happened before..

    Sila, to me is something I have always wanted.. but thought I didn't need.. she is innocent and sheltered.. there are many things she does not know that that are very obvious to all of us

    I get a kick out of having to teach her how to kiss and hold hands ^-^;

    She never knew how it was to really feel love..

    She sees past my horrible habits and flaws.. they are nothing to her.. they don't phase her one bit.. she welcomes them with open arms in fact..

    She loves the simple things I do, the way I think.. and how I act.. she makes me feel that its ok to be not perfect and weird and odd and emotional.. because none of that matters when it comes to being together.. if the other person can accept it

    Through out the many years I have Known Sila.. I can't recall anytime we have ever Fought or argued.. and if we do.. I am true belief that we will just come up with answer that suits us both


    anyways.. I think you all get the jist of where I am coming from, To actually explain how it is to really feel something with a person could take ages to put into writing.. and I will save you all the horrible reading XD

    Also.. now I know the real meaning behind why the date you started dating means so much.. its a book mark to the point in time where you finally found your missing piece =o
    Its a real milestone.. to the point in life where everything finally started making stupid sense!!


    Thanks fer readin

  2. #2

    Default

    I'm just...speechless. <3 I think my smile that you see on webcam atm explains everything that I can't put into words. It really takes someone special to..accept someone like me, who has been through a lot in her past and yet has never even gotten to hold someone's hand. <-<;

    Before I go on a huge ramble, I'll just bring this back to skype and let you see the smile on my face and hope that explains enough. :love:

    I really do love you And y'know...



    She hid in the background.. guiding me through life
    standing next to me like a sister, helping me anyway she can..
    she sat there and watched as I fell in love with people.. listened to my stories.. listened as I told her things I thought were true, she even supported me in every relationship i decided to endure.. gave advice.. Unconditionally, cared about what I wanted.. and supported me in what I did.. even tho deep inside, she was missing something, it didn't matter to her whether she was alone.. or hurt.. no..
    when Bobkitty wanted her.. she was the friend to come to..
    Makes me wanna cry...because I did..and I didn't even realize it myself for so long. I simply wanted for you to be happy, and whether that meant pushing you to try a relationship with someone else even though I liked you, I didn't care. <3

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