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Thread: End of Year

  1. #1

    Default End of Year

    Well it is the end of my Junior year in HS and this where I stand. Academically, I am an Aristocrat in that feild, but socially... I have not hung out with one girl for more than 10 minutes in all of HS and same goes for going on a date, not a single one. I have never been to a party either and rarely hangout with friends, am I at a bad or underdeveloped position in my life?

    Were any of you gron ups like me in HS and regret not doing those things?

  2. #2

    Default

    I was an only child, so I had to be with someone out in the real world. I always had my small group of friends, one of whom was my best friend. We hung out daily. In my junior year I met this girl and by my senior year we were intimate, so I'm afraid I was different from so many members on this site.

    I will say that you are not alone in what I read posted on adisc. I've often wondered if being more of a loner tends to go along with the DL mentality. There's enough evidence to not support that theory, but there are many like you. It may be that the cart is before the horse. In other words, many of our members are on this site because they are at home on their computers rather than out with friends and girl friends.

    Anyway, this has been a discussed topic, and I think my answer will be like many others. You have to get your nerve up and start talking to girls. Be a nice person, kind and considerate of others. I do believe girls take note of that. As a student, we live much of our life in the classroom. We have our own persona in that classroom. Try to assess what yours is like and how you go over to others. If you project being happy, caring and kind, I think there will be a girl out there who will be interested in you.

  3. #3

    Default

    I went through a stage for a couple years where I didn't hang out with many people. Specifically last school year... mainly because I wasn't in school, and I stopped answering phone calls and going out, so eventually all my friends gave up on trying to get me out. It sucked. I felt so loserish.

    I have to say, I do regret not hanging out with people for that stint of time. I regret not staying in school, going to my prom, all the parties, etc... I guess it'd depend on your personality, but I am much happier when I am in a social environment, and I have people to talk to and hang out with.

    Being social and having friends is all a choice. If you're not happy with the way things are now, then change it. It IS possible.

  4. #4
    Asher

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Cupcake View Post
    I went through a stage for a couple years where I didn't hang out with many people. Specifically last school year... mainly because I wasn't in school, and I stopped answering phone calls and going out, so eventually all my friends gave up on trying to get me out. It sucked. I felt so loserish.

    I have to say, I do regret not hanging out with people for that stint of time. I regret not staying in school, going to my prom, all the parties, etc... I guess it'd depend on your personality, but I am much happier when I am in a social environment, and I have people to talk to and hang out with.

    Being social and having friends is all a choice. If you're not happy with the way things are now, then change it. It IS possible.
    ^^
    this

    What is most important is that you are happy with what you are doing. If you are not, why not go hang out with a some friends, go to a movie, etc.?

    I know how you feel when it comes to being lonely in high school. In my freshman year, I was a loner, and I didn't hang out with any friends. Looking back now, I am surprised that I was able to survive that year. I wasn't happy with it, so come sophomore year, I changed and became more outgoing. The point is that you have to be happy with what you're doing; if not, go do something to change it! : )

    - Asher

  5. #5

    Default

    I just graduated from HS and I did the same thing your doing. I only went on one date in HS and that was to go see Sweeney Todd with a girl from out circle of friends. As far as dances, I only went to one of those and it wasn't even a school function, it was a prom held by an orgination for blind/vision impared people.

    My thing is that I didn't go to parties because I would rather just go to a friends house and drink the night away along with playing GTA IV; That's my idea of a good time.

    So I say just do what you like doing, if you make it through HS and never go on a date or to a party that's fine, just as long as when you look back you ask yourself "Did I have fun?" if yes then who cares how you had it.

  6. #6

    Default

    Well I can say I am not happy with the way things are going. First off, my idea of a party is NOT drinking! I have seen the effects of it and it is not good, only if I can exploite those who drink to make money off of them. I don't smoke, drink, do drugs, have sex or anything! and I am happy with that. The only reason I go to school dances is to be seen. Personally the way people dance there disgust me. I need to change my ways and talk to girls more often, but IDK why, but I am just afraid of them, mainly b/c I have a horrible fear of rejection

    By that I mean my body like goes into collapse...I get sad, angry, sick, I kind of starve myself and end up sleeping for like 20 hours. I am fine with not drinking or doing anything bad, but I would just like to hang out with girls and not go into complete collapse.

    Another reason why I don't hang out with people is b/c my job. I work every weekend all day. I am a "Laborer" at a lumber yard and I unload rail cars full of lumber. I am just too tired to do anything at the end of the day. You could say that I live the life of a 17 years old in 1900.

    As to one of the other posts above about the "I am surprised that I was able to survive that year" I almost didn't make it out alive in my Freshman year I was probably 2 seconds away from death(caused by me) I tried strangling myself b/c of social rejection and academic failure.

  7. #7

    Default

    Take another English course; read The Elements of Style. These things will help you avoid social rejection and academic failure in life.

    All else can wait.

  8. #8

    Default

    I wouldn't worry about it all that much. Personally, Junior year for me was when I really started hanging out with a lot of people. At that point, I got involved in a few things, I was captain of the ski team. Yes, I know it's not the football team, but whatever, it was my thing and it still is really. However, I think the reason Junior year was the year that I came more out of my shell was that I finally had a car. Having a car was pretty much a necessity as it really was quite difficult for people to get together outside of school without transportation, as our school had a pretty vast geographic area, about 10 miles east, west, north and south.

    I found out that I was a total gear-head, and hung out with other car guys. Really, with the group of people I hung out with, we weren't the type to take girls to the movies on friday nights, instead you would find us at one of our houses doing work to one of our cars, whether it was tinting the windows, upgrading stereo's, fixing problems, and just the general stuff that teens do to their cars to make them look cooler, that years later we then realize were pretty asinine. Of course, the highly illegal street races at midnight were fun too, and somehow none of us ever got caught which is a miracle in itself.

    Really though, don't worry too much, find your thing and find others into it and you'll be fine.

  9. #9

    Default

    The best advice that I can give you is this:

    In my own life, I have never regretted the things that I have done. However, I have regretted things I didn't do.

    Well, actually, I only have one or two regrets. *shrug* But these are both things that I didn't do. The things I did--even the stupid things--all helped shape me into the picture of awesomeness I am today.

  10. #10

    Default

    well, I'm pretty much the polar opposite of you. Academicaly I suck, and instead of being a social pariah, I party hard every weekend. I've had tones of relationships but they never last long. And now that I'm graduating, I kind of regret not studying harder. Gosh, I haven't studied for a test since grade nine.

    but yeah, I'd say you're a tad bit socially underdeveloped. then again, socializing comes as natural to me as possible. i'm fairly well known in my school and town, and a few of my friend's are in a band, so that means good weekly parties.
    Instead of maybe working the weekend away and holing yourself up at home, you should get involved in maybe sports or other extra curricular activeties - even if it's just chess club. put yerself out there, man. do stuff you'd never expect yourself to do. ever see "Yes Man" where jim carrey has to say yes to everything? be like that. Go sky diving, do stand up comedy at an open mic night, sing karaoke, go to parties.\

    ... maybe have a sip of alcohol? I know you're against it and all that jazz, but alcohol is a very big part of the culture. I'm not suggesting you break the law, but a little bit of underage drinking never hurt anyone. (wink wink, nudge, nudge)

    So, put yourself out there and enjoy life! You only have one go, so why not make the best of it? Sure, you could waste your time making a whole lotta money, but when you're lying on your death bed would you rather have friends surrounding you or piles of cash?

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