Does anyone have recommendations for how to act at a littles munch?

hex000f

hex000f

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I've only been to a littles munch once before so I don't have much experience. It seems like a conundrum because you're all there because you share an uncommon and commonly misunderstood interest. All the guests probably want to meet other littles and hopefully get to know then well enough that you can have play time with them later but at the same time I would guess that it would be creepy to ask too much about someone at first, especially in a public place. After some thought I think I should treat it like a "vanilla" social gathering for making friends. Is this the right approach?

Also as a separate question: I sent a message to someone on fetlife once which I thought was a polite "Hello, I read your profile, we have these video games in common... feel free to message me back at your leisure" message but they blocked me without any response. They have a selfie on their profile so I'll know them if I see them, but I don't have any profile photos so they won't know me unless I give out my handle. What should I do if I see them? I'm prepared to give them another chance since we had a lot in common and also they mentioned anxiety episodes in their profile. I'm equally prepared to not talk to them at all if that's what they want. I just don't know if/when to bring it up.
 
Honestly a public munch is just a normal social gathering. You'd meet people that are new to the scene and veterans that probably been in the scene for a long time. Just go with an open mind and just talk to people. Unless they state that it's more than just a normal munch IE a private invite only munch, don't expect too much to happen at the munch. Some hosts will have after parties and that is usually where the magic happens :p
 
Yeppers, if it is a public gathering it's best to keep things as casual and easygoing as possible. Public Munches or Gatherings are more like meet and greets than anything; everyone attending is in plainclothes, you mingle with them and hopefully, you hit it off with a few of them. At a public munch everyone is gonna be keeping the AB/DL stuff on the down-low or incognito, you should too, unless someone else initiates conversation surrounding AB/DL interests.

As Lilkayden said, there are after-hours Munches and parties that people will host from their homes, those types of get-togethers are a bit more in depth; you can wear, there's usually snacks and various little activities :)

As far as the message on Fetlife is concerned, I'm going to assume that they were a woman, correct me if I'm wrong, but chances are they have probably been contacted by a few too many pushy people in the past, so this person has developed an "I'll make the first move" mentality. That being the case, even though your message was courteous, they didn't and don't like getting messages unsolicited unless they initiate things, so they blocked you. If you notice this person at the Munch, I wouldn't even bring it up, you don't want to gather any negative attention at a munch and that would be a very awkward and off-putting conversation to have at what is supposed to be a pleasant get-together.

In any event, I hope you enjoy the munch :)
 
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Poofybutt said:
Yeppers, if it is a public gathering it's best to keep things as casual and easygoing as possible. Public Munches or Gatherings are more like meet and greets than anything; everyone attending is in plainclothes, you mingle with them and hopefully, you hit it off with a few of them. At a public munch everyone is gonna be keeping the AB/DL stuff on the down-low or incognito, you should too, unless someone else initiates conversation surrounding AB/DL interests.

As Lilkayden said, there are after-hours Munches and parties that people will host from their homes, those types of get-togethers are a bit more in depth; you can wear, there's usually snacks and various little activities :)

As far as the message on Fetlife is concerned, I'm going to assume that they were a woman, correct me if I'm wrong, but chances are they have probably been contacted by a few too many pushy people in the past, so this person has developed an "I'll make the first move" mentality. That being the case, even though your message was courteous, they didn't and don't like getting messages unsolicited unless they initiate things, so they blocked you. If you notice this person at the Munch, I wouldn't even bring it up, you don't want to gather any negative attention at a munch and that would be a very awkward and off-putting conversation to have at what is supposed to be a pleasant get-together.

In any event, I hope you enjoy the munch :)
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That all sounds right. What do I do if they ask how to keep in touch?
 
hex000f said:
That all sounds right. What do I do if they ask how to keep in touch?
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Just the usual stuff ; exchange numbers or e-mail addresses, text, call or message on occasion, etc.

I know one can get a bit nervous when they haven't attended a munch before or in a while, but from the sounds of things, this is a casual, public Munch. Just take it easy and if some folks want to keep in touch with you, then just do the usual stuff above :)
 
Poofybutt said:
Just the usual stuff ; exchange numbers or e-mail addresses, text, call or message on occasion, etc.

I know one can get a bit nervous when they haven't attended a munch before or in a while, but from the sounds of things, this is a casual, public Munch. Just take it easy and if some folks want to keep in touch with you, then just do the usual stuff above :)
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I meant something more like: "what do I do if the person who blocked me before wants to keep in touch on fet life?"
 
Ive gone to numerous munches in my area, its just like anything else, you need to make friends first, also since many munches are held in public venues you need to keep it vanilla. Most of the munches listed in fetlife have a rules section for all attendees, read them and follow them.
As for messaging people on fet, personally when I get a basic message from someone with a basic profile and no pics, not a lot of bio or friends with people I'm friends with I just ignore them unless they start harassing me, or I see there conduct on other posts is out of taste or poor, then they get blocked.
So if you want to be taken seriously on fet, update your profile, be descriptive, have some pictures.
 
Act as you would any social event and be yourself.

As for the person who blocked you being there, I wouldn't make too big a deal of it. In fact I'd just ignore it and pretend it never happened.

It's just like any other social gathering. You just all so happen to have something in common.
 
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