changing @ work.

daylight said:
I agree, the goal is external presentation - wet incognito.

That point must be very far away, after doing this for years, I'm still not peachy about changing in a work bathroom. I can change when out and about, no problem, I'm not likely to know anyone in the bathroom. For instance, had people barge in on me, see through the gaps, and notice what I carry in and out. Sigh. However, at work, there's a lot of interaction, peer-social ranking, and water cooler (school yard) career limiting rumors that changes everything - risk adverse.

When at work, I change frequently, and limit fluid intake. I have a very sensitive nose to perfume and other smells thus, I have asked my wife, "Do I smell...". She usually says no, unless I do. Nevertheless, if I can avoid embarrassment from "'sniff, sniff' what is that smell?". Been there, hated it. This includes cover up scents like (any type of) powder or strongly scented absorbent products.

I don't know, each of us must balance this out. For me: Because one can go eight hours, doesn't imply that one should. Sniff, sniff...
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yeah there are days when I try to hold it and just can't. I wear a unique wellness diaper which is a good diaper for me. That is why I can go for so long but yeah there are days when at the end of my shift I have to get somewhere and change before I go home or go out and do anything. One of these days I am going to get busted by a co worker anyway because when I am out in public I am not as discreet about it as I am at work. There are times when I have been known to have a diaper laying on the front seat of my car. I don't want to rush the process of co workers finding out. If they find out by accident then I will confess my problem and issues with the CP. One thing I am finding out is, most people don't care, we all have our own issues to deal with.
 
lilshelly said:
yeah there are days when I try to hold it and just can't. I wear a unique wellness diaper which is a good diaper for me. That is why I can go for so long but yeah there are days when at the end of my shift I have to get somewhere and change before I go home or go out and do anything. One of these days I am going to get busted by a co worker anyway because when I am out in public I am not as discreet about it as I am at work. There are times when I have been known to have a diaper laying on the front seat of my car. I don't want to rush the process of co workers finding out. If they find out by accident then I will confess my problem and issues with the CP. One thing I am finding out is, most people don't care, we all have our own issues to deal with.
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First - Happy holidays.

I believe that leaving out a diaper on the seat of the car or on the bed, the discovered/busted think, hanging pul pants to dry in the bathroom/laundry are (sub)conscious acts that say 'find me' to confront something that is really socially/emotionally hard to handle, and that one seeks personal assurance that you are okay/normal, a person, of value - a visual cry for compassion/help. I know, I do (done) this as well.

Are we trying to normalize incontinence, or shout 'here I am'? It's worth considering the motivation behind these thoughts verses acting on them. One needs to realize that the actual consequences of this act (outside of the mind) is likely not wise in some environments. If you work in an area and with a close group of caring people then likely you will get the compassion and support you seek. Then again, you may not.

Talking to someone about incontinence struggles or any issue is healing. I understand. The optics at work may not be the best.
 
I hope all had a good Thanksgiving.
I don't know if it is so much an act of find me as much as it is my attitude is changing this is not something that can be helped. There are times when being discreet is a good idea yeah. but one in here stated it about right when you are incontinent you are just that. In my case lack of mobility I understand the consequences for the most part but I am not a kid anymore my doctor knows I wear as it is part of my medical record. I know not everyone is going to accept it but it is me. I expected to be wheelchair bound before going back into diapers but when my better half found out that I was struggling to make it to the bathroom he suggested the diapers as a way to manage it. He even helped me talk to the doctor as it was not a subject that I was wanting to really deal with. I am still kinda scared that having the need for the diapers is just another step towards my disability getting the best of me. I have been reassured that it is not. I appreciate your insight because it can hold true for some. Hugs...
 
good advice

well said, also, if a higher absorbency product is not possible. eg, not your prescription, you can buy absorbent inserts to add to pads absorbency.
 
When my IC started I talked with my employe - more precisely with a spokesman from the union who's responsible for the belongings of disabled persons. As result we got a diaper bin in the toilet, where I could dispose my pad's.
 
At work I just use a normal restroom and change myself there. Of course the transport of the diaper to the restroom is not "openly" (e.g. it's carried in a bag).
 
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