Bf incontinence

Hi I hope all is well,

I wouldn’t try to hide the fact as that will only raise questions later. Also I’m not sure how “frisky” he will feel and even if he goes over for a hug or a harmless butt pat it’s going to be obvious. Also I don’t know about you but when I wear disposables to be bed the do kinda have a slight odour while wet, not very strong but it is there.

I’m sure he is a nice guy and it won’t bother him, this is a tiny tiny part of the obviously nice human you are, anyone who can’t see that is shallow. Would you look down on anyone say they had foot amputated? I doubt it.

hey, How did last night go?

ABDLsean said:

hey, How did last night go?

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It worked out much better for me, I didn't wear a nappy and I wet the bed, but I convinced him it wasn't me we were both wet so I am able to keep it a secret a little bit longer I am to scared to tell him

So you convinced him he wet the bed? Even though he is probably convinced he didn't?

Thanks everyone for all your advice I will tell him soon, I am just going to think of the easiest way to explain it without him thinking I am a broken person, much love and thanks for all the support and beautiful people on here!

No one thinks you are broken, please don’t put yourself down

mikesecret said:

A lot of us have been there. The best thing is to be honest. There are ways of dealing with it but if your really interested in somebody you cant avoid it. The time to talk is before he wakes up in your pee in the morning. Im bi and when I was younger I found that didnt work out with partners of either gender even if the bedwetting was infrequent because with me a lot of it related to drinking. With some partners its a deal breaker but others are more understanding. There are lots of products to help these days. And I had one partner who insisted I sleep in a separate bed after I was drinking. That relationship lasted for 3 years. So it can be done.

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My exact situation in college. If you are going to get serious and sleep with someone you owe it to them to alert them to your nighttime challenge and if you wear protective undergarments. I had more than 98% of the people I slept with understand and some were even thankful I told them and wore in front of them so as not to have them wake up in my accident if I tried to hide it and not wear any protection. Now if it is just a sleepover and you are in a different bed you can always change in the bathroom and not need to mention it unless asked.

People who are serious about each other or just want to have a fun time should look over a nighttime sleeping issue you have or continuous aspect of your taking precautions and wearing a specific type of protective underwear 24/7.

Ask yourself... "Is it worth the risk of rejection for the reward of true love?" Think of it this way... Worst scenario you find out it was never going to work out anyway

I'd also point out that by keeping this need to know info about your incontinence is literally no different than lying to him. Making him believe he wet the bed is also a lie. Do you really want to base your early relationship with him on lies? Also consider that IF he does react negatively to your needing diapers, then he really is not the right person for you. The longer you wait, the more emotionally invested you will be with him, and the harder it will be to tell him.

I know this isn't what you want to hear, but you figuratively need to rip this bandaid off. Soon too.

Redeemz said:

It worked out much better for me, I didn't wear a nappy and I wet the bed, but I convinced him it wasn't me we were both wet so I am able to keep it a secret a little bit longer I am to scared to tell him

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That's kind of a horrible thing to do to him honestly, making him worry about issues he might be having. You care about this person right? Imagine the situation was reverse, how would you feel if he left you thinking you were wetting at night?

Hi Redeemz

I hope the last few days have been easier for you.

I realise that you may not want to hear this, but you need to be honest about your wetting issues with your boyfriend. Incontinence is a pain, but you can't hide it from him anymore. It's not healthy for you and it's not healthy for your relationship either, especially if your partner is starting to think that HE's wetting the bed rather than you.

I fully understand that this isn't an easy subject to bring up and you'll be scared about it. Being afraid is natural. But what's not natural is letting this fear overpower everything else in your life - the fear of your bedwetting should not overpower your love for your boyfriend. If it does, something is clearly out of balance.

You need to take a deep breath and face your fears. Reassure your boyfriend that he's not been having wetting issues, and you're sorry that you didn't tell him sooner. Then take responsibility for your accidents and wear some decent protection (diapers or thick pull-ups). It may suck but if you ask him to help you manage it, it may help your relationship rather than worsen it.

I say this as someone who is bladder incontinent and wears diapers 24/7 to manage this issue. I've had relationships in the past and my partners have been understanding for the most part. It really isn't that big a deal unless you make it one. if incontinence was the only health issue I had to deal with, I'd consider myself lucky.

Breathe Deep, Seek Peace
Dinotopian2002