LittleMissPink
Est. Contributor
- Messages
- 464
- Role
- Adult Baby
- Diaper Lover
- Sissy
So I have been dealing with this for years and the regret never goes away. I keep looking back at my life when I was younger (early twenties now) at around 4 and 5 and remembering I had, had plenty of opportunities to wear but didn't. One time was taking diapers from the changing room at church or even just from my younger sister's box of nappies. I regret not taking those chances. I was too, for want of a better word...righteous? I couldn't bring myself to do it knowing they weren't my nappies it felt like I was stealing. Which maybe I was from church but from my own home? not so sure about that.
But anyway it's not just that, as a child I would say I had low self confidence as I would usually back away from confrontations. So after asking my parents a few times and leaving notes and catalogue cut outs of Huggies nappies around the house for them saying I wanted to wear them, came a point when it all stopped. My mum yelled at me about "writing notes about wanting to wear nappies" and so...I stopped and yeah that was it. I couldn't handle the confrontation/embarrassment anymore and so the desire itself left (or lay dormant more like it) for a few years. But as everyone says "it always comes back" and so it did come back at around 10 years old.
I regret not pushing it. I know now if I had just asked again and again, they would have bought me nappies. "what do you want for your birthday? Nappies. What do you want for Christmas? Nappies etc" and if I kept pestering they would of broke down and I would of had the chance to experience wearing baby nappies properly. *sigh* I mean what could they do to punish me? Grounded? For how long? Eventually they would have to relent. The punishment (if they thought it would work) seems so trivial now. It would of been worth it. Imagine if I went on for months or even a year. Eventually they would of conceded.
I know that would of worked because right now I am very open about a lot of things (except nappies) such as wearing woman's clothes and they don't care. My father actually says I should "always be myself" so if that wasn't proof I don't know what is.
It's not just nappies, it's girl clothes too. I wish I had the courage and confidence as a child to wear those cute clothes that now I so wish I could fit into. I wish I wasn't such a wimp when I was younger. I cared too much about what other people thought instead of looking inwards and being me. I keep beating myself over this.
TLDR: I know it seems silly to dwell on the past about what you could of done differently but I can't help it. I missed out on two things I will never get to experience again (young cute girls clothes and baby nappies) because of my lack of confidence and self-esteem and I can't stop kicking myself over how pathetic my worrying was when I was younger. I wish I could go back and change it.
But anyway it's not just that, as a child I would say I had low self confidence as I would usually back away from confrontations. So after asking my parents a few times and leaving notes and catalogue cut outs of Huggies nappies around the house for them saying I wanted to wear them, came a point when it all stopped. My mum yelled at me about "writing notes about wanting to wear nappies" and so...I stopped and yeah that was it. I couldn't handle the confrontation/embarrassment anymore and so the desire itself left (or lay dormant more like it) for a few years. But as everyone says "it always comes back" and so it did come back at around 10 years old.
I regret not pushing it. I know now if I had just asked again and again, they would have bought me nappies. "what do you want for your birthday? Nappies. What do you want for Christmas? Nappies etc" and if I kept pestering they would of broke down and I would of had the chance to experience wearing baby nappies properly. *sigh* I mean what could they do to punish me? Grounded? For how long? Eventually they would have to relent. The punishment (if they thought it would work) seems so trivial now. It would of been worth it. Imagine if I went on for months or even a year. Eventually they would of conceded.
I know that would of worked because right now I am very open about a lot of things (except nappies) such as wearing woman's clothes and they don't care. My father actually says I should "always be myself" so if that wasn't proof I don't know what is.
It's not just nappies, it's girl clothes too. I wish I had the courage and confidence as a child to wear those cute clothes that now I so wish I could fit into. I wish I wasn't such a wimp when I was younger. I cared too much about what other people thought instead of looking inwards and being me. I keep beating myself over this.
TLDR: I know it seems silly to dwell on the past about what you could of done differently but I can't help it. I missed out on two things I will never get to experience again (young cute girls clothes and baby nappies) because of my lack of confidence and self-esteem and I can't stop kicking myself over how pathetic my worrying was when I was younger. I wish I could go back and change it.