telling parents about being ABDL how to get them to accept it

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BabyLeon

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hey guys i know some of you probably had trouble telling parents about being ABDL. i live with my father because times are tough for some of us and i dislike work, i'm a wannabe ABDL and i wish he would accept it. especialy the wearing nappies part
 
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I know all about this. I'm kinda the expert of it around here. I told my parents at 17, and I still live with them and my sister. They all let me wear diapers and be a baby around the house. They're amazing. But it took us a lot of talks to slowly get there.

Just talk to your dad. If he loves you, he should listen. It might be hard to understand at first, but answer his questions, be patient, and show him information about this. It can work out :)
 
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BabyLeon said:
hey guys i know some of you probably had trouble telling parents about being ABDL. i live with my father because times are tough for some of us and i dilike work, i'm a wannabe ABDL and i wish he would accept it. especialy the wearing nappies part

Weird. You're thread count isn't showing. Oh well. I was going to say to also have a get out of jail card. In other words, a way of backing up if your dad doesn't like what he's hearing. I got caught by my parents and they weren't supportive, so I had to say, well I guess I should stop wearing, etc. I had to get the heat off me. Of course, I couldn't stop wearing and wetting diapers, but eventually I got my own place.
 
yeah it's hard i relly want to diaper up 24/7 and get right into the ABDL but it's hard to talk about it with him
 
BabyLeon said:
yeah it's hard i relly want to diaper up 24/7 and get right into the ABDL but it's hard to talk about it with him

It's always hard. How is he like? Maybe if you tell us we can figure something out.
 
my father is a smartass, stuborn and a hardass and can be childish at times
 
BabyLeon said:
my father is a smartass, stuborn and a hardass and can be childish at times

Hmm, that doesn't sound very approachable. How is he with you? How is your relationship?
 
I think, cross that, know it's a horrible idea. Don't do it. Get your life together, and go on your own, and you wouldn't have to worry about stuff like that. Who else is going to pay for your diapers. I'm sure you wouldn't want your dad to tell you about his fantasies either.

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Yep sage advice. Get your own place and while you live with your parents keep it on the down low. Parents have a right to not know about their kids sex lives.
 
MeTaLMaNN1983 said:
I think, cross that, know it's a horrible idea. Don't do it. Get your life together, and go on your own, and you wouldn't have to worry about stuff like that. Who else is going to pay for your diapers. I'm sure you wouldn't want your dad to tell you about his fantasies either.

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dethpuck said:
Yep sage advice. Get your own place and while you live with your parents keep it on the down low. Parents have a right to not know about their kids sex lives.

But my parents know... and they support it. They let me wear diapers, and be a baby around the house. I know it's scary for some, but it's not actually that weird. I feel very close to them now.
 
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kik91 said:
Hmm, that doesn't sound very approachable. How is he with you? How is your relationship?


i some times get angry with him and he is annoying sometimes. my desires to be an ABDL has given me mild depression and it gets worse when the urges get bad, other then that its decent. we don't argue or anything like that

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kik91 said:
But my parents know... and they support it. They let me wear diapers, and be a baby around the house. I know it's scary for some, but it's not actually that weird. I feel very close to them now.

i wish i could have that i'm hoping support may be needed to help convince him
 
BabyLeon said:
i some times get angry with him and he is annoying sometimes. my desires to be an ABDL has given me mild depression and it gets worse when the urges get bad, other then that its decent. we don't argue or anything like that

Just think about how you'd like to talk it with him. Nobody is perfect, but if you think he'd understand, then go for it. But if you're not sure, then think twice until you make up your mind.
 
kik91 said:
Just think about how you'd like to talk it with him. Nobody is perfect, but if you think he'd understand, then go for it. But if you're not sure, then think twice until you make up your mind.

the thing is i can't talk to him direclty about it i've left letters and notes about it but never directly
 
BabyLeon said:
i some times get angry with him and he is annoying sometimes. my desires to be an ABDL has given me mild depression and it gets worse when the urges get bad, other then that its decent. we don't argue or anything like that

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i wish i could have that i'm hoping support may be needed to help convince him

THIS RIGHT HERE. You need to tell your father how hiding it is affecting you so negatively. Start off by writing a letter to him. A direct one where you will be there as he reads it! This will give you a chance to collect your thoughts completely, and make sure everything gets said. By being there, you can answer questions and get immediate feedback from him whichcwill allow you to direct the conversation into your favor.

If you don't tell him, he is nearly certain to figure it out himself eventually. Or worse, stumble on to your stash of diapers. When this happens you probably won't be there, so he will come to his own mis-conclusions and end up even more angry or even disgusted. Pretending you can keep it completely hidden is the worst thing you can do. So you're right, you do need to tell him.

Start off by doing some serious research. Figure out what being abdl is to you. For most of us, it is an ingrained part of who we are. This isn't something we chose to get into, and trying to deny it only leads to the classic binge-purge cycle, or as you found out, depression. Many of us don't wear diapers strictly for the sexual joy it can bring us either, and we certainly don't wear them so we can be with babies. We wear them to feel the same emotional support, comfort, and relief that a baby feels.

And wearing diapers may be weird, but it isn't illegal or immoral to. It doesn't hurt ourselves either (aside from the occasional rash). In fact it helps us to destress at home which then helps us cope with the rest society in a more productive way the rest of the time.

The abdl community is also a lot bigger than you may think. There are 10's of thousands of us online, and that likely represents just 10% of us all. Meaning there are way more than 100,000 abdl's out there, in just the usa alone. There's possibly even as high as a million of us worldwide. So being abdl isn't all that uncommon.

There's a LOT more which can be made for arguing you should be true to yourself too. Once you've got all of that written down, pick a good time to sit down with your father. A time when he isnt hungry, busy, or wanting to watch a favorite show. Let him know you still want to keep your diapering needs as discreet as you can. Make sure he understands this is your thing and you don't want him involved in any way. The real reason you feel he needs to know this is in case he stumbles across your stuff so he won't freak out and get mad. You also hope to know he can still love you, the full you with flaws and all.
 
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Slomo said:
THIS RIGHT HERE. You need to tell your father how hiding it is affecting you so negatively. Start off by writing a letter to him. A direct one where you will be there as he reads it! This will give you a chance to collect your thoughts completely, and make sure everything gets said. By being there, you can answer questions and get immediate feedback from him whichcwill allow you to direct the conversation into your favor.

If you don't tell him, he is nearly certain to figure it out himself eventually. Or worse, stumble on to your stash of diapers. When this happens you probably won't be there, so he will come to his own mis-conclusions and end up even more angry or even disgusted. Pretending you can keep it completely hidden is the worst thing you can do. So you're right, you do need to tell him.

Start off by doing some serious research. Figure out what being abdl is to you. For most of us, it is an ingrained part of who we are. This isn't something we chose to get into, and trying to deny it only leads to the classic binge-purge cycle, or as you found out, depression. Many of us don't wear diapers strictly for the sexual joy it can bring us either, and we certainly don't wear them so we can be with babies. We wear them to feel the same emotional support, comfort, and relief that a baby feels.

And wearing diapers may be weird, but it isn't illegal or immoral to. It doesn't hurt ourselves either (aside from the occasional rash). In fact it helps us to destress at home which then helps us cope with the rest society in a more productive way the rest of the time.

The abdl community is also a lot bigger than you may think. There are 10's of thousands of us online, and that likely represents just 10% of us all. Meaning there are way more than 100,000 abdl's out there, in just the usa alone. There's possibly even as high as a million of us worldwide. So being abdl isn't all that uncommon.

There's a LOT more which can be made for arguing you should be true to yourself too. Once you've got all of that written down, pick a good time to sit down with your father. A time when he isnt hungry, busy, or wanting to watch a favorite show. Let him know you still want to keep your diapering needs as discreet as you can. Make sure he understands this is your thing and you don't want him involved in any way. The real reason you feel he needs to know this is in case he stumbles across your stuff so he won't freak out and get mad. You also hope to know he can still love you, the full you with flaws and all.

thanks i will try but i'm just not very confident in this it's hard to talk about and i get too nervous because i don't know how he'd react and i guess i'm scared to tell him, he dosn't even know i'm Asexual either i just don't wish to disapoint him but i also want to be diapered really bad and be an ABDL
 
Eh, I dunno, friend. I personally decided, when I fell into this scenario, that maybe it’s best to keep this on the down-low until I can get myself situated on my own.

I kept it low, and now I move out in under a month.

If you can’t and you’ve determined that you must try to talk to him, I wish you the absolute best-of-luck :)
 
My personal opinion on this, which doesn't necessarily need to be yours, is that for many AB/DL is, at least partly, a sexual fetish. For some it's more comfort related, and for others it's more sexual related, but let's look at this from another perspective. Does your father seek approval from you for his fetishes? I'm not saying you shouldn't be open with your parents, I'm quite open with mine, but I don't discuss what I do in the bedroom with my parents, just as I wouldn't expect them (and would find it admittedly uncomfortable) if they tried discussing it with me.

The way I see it, the only one who needs to give you approval for that is your significant other/romantic interest.
 
BabyLeon said:
thanks i will try but i'm just not very confident in this it's hard to talk about and i get too nervous because i don't know how he'd react and i guess i'm scared to tell him, he dosn't even know i'm Asexual either i just don't wish to disapoint him but i also want to be diapered really bad and be an ABDL

Right, that's why I suggest you write him a direct letter instead. That way you won't have to be nervous about what to say. As for being scared, the only thing to fear is the fear itself. You KNOW however he reacts, it will be worse if he finds your stuff before you tell him in a controlled manner. Even if it does turn out he over reacts badly to you telling him, doing so still gives you the best chance for a positive outcome.
 
MeTaLMaNN1983 said:
I think, cross that, know it's a horrible idea. Don't do it. Get your life together, and go on your own, and you wouldn't have to worry about stuff like that. Who else is going to pay for your diapers. I'm sure you wouldn't want your dad to tell you about his fantasies either.

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Seconded. The point is, OP, you have the potential to have this go so wrong, whereas you likely don’t even stand to profit anything substantial if it does go your way. More than likely, telling him would just be regrettable and awkward.

You are in your mid-twenties. I have to think that moving out is at least a possibility for you, either now or in the not-too-distant future. In any case, I would imagine that you have your own room and some modicum of privacy. There’s no reason that you can’t just purchase diapers in secret, and use them and sneak them into the trash now and again. That’s what I did when I lived with my parents, and as long as you don’t get careless, it’s low-risk enough. Not ideal, of course, but livable.

Speaking of my parents, that brings me to the reason that I always try to discourage people from telling their families. While some members of ADISC have had wonderful experiences coming out as ABDL to their parents, those people definitely seem to be in the minority. Realistically the best you could hope for would probably be that your father awkwardly allows you to buy diapers and use them on your own, which isn’t much better than just keeping the secret to yourself in the first place. What’s also likely, however, is that he freaks the hell out. When I was a child, every time I tried to explain to my parents what being a DL was, they’d cry, get angry, call me names, punish me, throw out all my diapers, you name it. Having them come into contact with my kink in any way was always an exercise in misery and frustration, and their rejection of this side of me absolutely damaged our relationship in the long term.

My point is, as others have said, it is definitely true that things could work out well for you if you told him. However, my personal experience compels me to advise you to either do it in secret or wait until you are on your own. Either way, good luck, and let us know what you decide to do.
 
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Kovy said:
What’s also likely, however, is that he freaks the hell out. When I was a child, every time I tried to explain to my parents what being a DL was, they’d cry, get angry, call me names, punish me, throw out all my diapers, you name it.

Littlelolikat (arguably as close as anyone can get to "celebrity" status in the ABDL scene nowadays) was recently outed by someone she considered a friend, to her family and others, as she'd kept this part of her life a secret. She ended up having to move out of her parents' place and start her life anew somewhere else. Although she didn't necessarily keep her identity secret, it just goes to show there is far more to lose then there is to gain from such a move.
 
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