Old Potty Training

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woodenpotty

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This maybe for older members, but everyone that has input can pitch in. While most of us can't remember our own potty training we do sometimes have memories of others training. I'm a early Baby Boomer and lived in Chicago so there were lots of kids. We were often in other kid's homes. I saw a lot of kids being trained. Age was one thing, they started very early by our standards. And often very rigid methods. It seemed that most mommies had particular ( and frequent times for the child to be put on the potty). I'll let this start and a little later I'll add some of the details of potty training in the 1950s.
 
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All i remember is the "shaming" part.:(
 
That is memorable any time. In some ways it was better in the 50s as they did a lot of spanking. But at least the important people in your life didn't say bad things about you. I remember at a friend's house and his younger sister was seated on the potty chair and she wanted to go play. But she stayed put, although unlike all the other kids I knew, she wasn't retained by a seat belt of a tray. I said to him "Why doesn't she get up?" He replied something like "If she gets up without mom's permission, she will be spanked". While I'm sure shaming happened, I don't think it was common, a red butt was.
 
littlemoosey said:
All i remember is the "shaming" part.:(

My self too.
My Mom used the "Potty Training Method" on me, that she saw being used on intellectually/developmentally disabled children warehoused in the Hogan-Berry Center for the Feeble-Minded on MA Route 62 in the 1950's.
I was physically "tied-down" onto my potty chair for hours, sometimes with my hands tied-down to the armrests and behind the wrap-around tray in front to stymie any attempt at feces smearing and also to stymie and prevent me from engaging in "evil and satanic" masturbation of my private anatomy.
Potty Training was a "Living Hell" of "physical restraint", and "involuntary" forced defecation into my potty chair bowl "each and every morning" via Suppositories and Enemas, and utterly "no control whatsoever regarding being physically touched by my Mom" to make me "clean and dry".
I hate the "Potty Chair/Toilet" now with every last fiber of my being.
DIAPERS NOW!!!!!
DIAPERS FOREVER!!!!!
 
That's too much.

I'm sorry for your experience. It sure seems she was lacking the ability to love you. And being loved covers a lot of tough times. That seems to be the reason for your aversion.
A number of the things that were abuse for you (and please don't think I'm demeaning you in any way) were common during the 1950s. As I said just about every child I saw being trained was restrained on the potty.

You went to the potty anytime mom thought it was needed. You stayed until you went or she decided you had spent enough time on the potty.

In regard to the wrists that was unusual. I did observe one boy who had his ankles strapped to the bottom of the chair. As you mentioned touching oneself was not permitted.

A lot of adults thought that masturbation would cause you to degenerate. And unfortunately your mother saw individuals that had problems try to masturbate. And the people she saw did have problems (probably not from masturbation)

My mother watched my sister (who was a year younger than I) and me anytime we might be inclined to touch ourselves. We got caught fondling each other. We were well paddled for that nasty behavior. But I always felt loved even if my bottom was on fire from the paddle.

I wish I could turn back the clock for you and get your mother taught to be a better parent. I'm going to make a second message to this thread in a minute as it is getting too long.

- - - Updated - - -

Caitianx see how well this parallels your experience. My mother called this "the suppository method". The child was put on the potty at when she thought you should poop. You got about 15 minutes to accomplish the task. If you hadn't pooped. No poop you got the suppository.

Yes, she did think it important to have a daily movement. And she wanted it after breakfast. Even after we were well potty trained she wanted see poop. If not, then you were in for a treatment. And I saw at a lot of houses a jar of suppositories or enema equipment out where the trainee could see it. That was to encourage performance.

Suppositories were the standard until we were a little older (maybe three or four). Then it was the big red rubber bag. We were filled and made to hold it before we could go. I thought it was twenty gallons and we held it for 2 hours. But probably wasn't. I think it was about our early teens, we could have EX Lax. But regularity was still the goal.

I remember I decorated the wall with poop when I woke from a nap. I'm sure I was cleaned up and the paddle applied.:eek:tkspanking: My mother had commented quite a few times how my aunt would spank her kids with loaded pants. She thought that just made the aunt's life worse at change time. So I'm sure I was cleaned first.

I hope you aren't jealous because I am not mad about this. My mother always was loving and I think that was the difference. I'm assuming your mother was cold and you didn't feel loved. My wife had a mother like that and it caused her trouble in later life. :smile: I do wish you the best things in the rest of your life.

And for the rest of the world, this does some of what was done in the 1950s. At least this is what I saw.
 
I never lived in the fifties, but I've always kind of hated the time period based on history lessons and movies of the time. XD Now I'm sure I would have despised it even more. I hate that in movies depicting the time everything was shown as 'perfect', but you know from history that it was absolutely NOT.

Ironically enough, I potty trained myself. I wanted 'big girl panties' with My Little Ponies on them. I was told "Only big girls wear those. If you pee in your pants you can't wear them." So I said "I won't pee." And I didn't until I got hurt much later in life. The only accident I had as a child was when I was very sick and I couldn't get out of bed in time. And then I was mortified.
 
The funny thing, at the time, I didn't identify it as bad. It was normal. This was the way all the kids I knew from my neighborhood and from my cousins had it. So it was fine and I knew I was loved. The parents were doing the best that they could. And like all things anything has good and bad points. For example a group of kids (probably ranging from 6 to 12) could hop on a bus, go to a museum and return. All the while feeling perfectly safe. That covers a lot of things like strict potty training and spankings.

It sounds like your parents were patient and let you discover potty training on your own. I didn't, all 1950s parents thought that they needed to control things.
 
woodenpotty said:
It sounds like your parents were patient and let you discover potty training on your own. I didn't, all 1950s parents thought that they needed to control things.

It wasn't that patient. They basically showed me the underwear and knew I would want them 'cause of the cartoons. So I was like...three and potty trained.
 
In defense of early intense potty training were problems that didn't exist in later times. There were only cloth diapers. Washing machines were in short supply.

I was born two years after WW II and no machines had been made during the war. Factories made war materials and had to be changed back to making consumer goods. The 1946 (and many 1947) cars were identical to 1942 cars which had been made only a few months before Pearl Harbor They had stored the equipment and tooling. Building new models requires years of work and none was done during the war.

Anyway back to the story. My mother told of living in an apartment that did not even have hot water. She heated water and poured it into a small machine that was put on the kitchen sink's drainboard. She ran the machine to wash the diapers. It had to then be drained and new hot rinse water heated and added. Then run again and drained. The diapers had to be wrung out and hung to dry.

Does all of this sound like fun? repeat it every second day over and over. My sister came along and year and two weeks after me. So having two in diapers was even more work. So what ever was done to get me on the potty and trained seems justified.

Later on automatic washing machines, hot water etc. and eventually disposables changed the game. I'm sure I didn't like it at the time. But I would have done the same, given her circumstances. And knowing from her later behavior, it was never done in a mean manner but just necessary

One more thought. A mother magically transported to today. She would have thought the modern car seat as barbaric. Especially for long car trips. We were never restrained in a car and would enjoy playing in the open rear part of a station wagon.
Strapping your child in a potty chair for the amount of time it might take to drive to Walmart pales in perspective.
 
I wasn't from the fifties, but for potty training I have no memories of it. I actually asked my mom about it a long time ago and she told me I was easy to potty train.
 
I was potty trained in the 1960s. What I remember is the accidents. Specifically the messy ones. I did get spanked over her knee, and then mom would have me lay on my back, she would pull off my socks, shoes, trousers and training pants. She would rinse out the training pants in the toilet and wipe my bottom with them. I remember it being cold.
While she did this she refer to me with words like "icky nasty", and "filthy boy". I remember as I got older and had accidents she would follow this same routine wiping with my underwear, but she would also threaten to put me back in diapers. She never put me back in a diapers, but I knew the threat was real. My older sister once told me she was diapered by my mom when she had wet her pants at age 8. And my younger brother was diapered one time when he was 5 for a poopy accident.

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No surprise. Particularly if she considered you to have been trained. The way it sounds like, you were spanked on loaded pants. My mother was very adverse to that. She said it just makes clean up harder. While you were on your back and cleaned she could hold your ankles and burn up your bottom. That was the only time she spanked in that position, normally it was over the lap. When I was older, you were required to bend over a chair to be paddled.

One of my aunts had a different technique. Her kids were wiped off and put in the tub. Once scrubbed they got spanked while still wet. My cousins told me to be spanked wet was worse than when dry.

That part about assumed to be trained is significant. I had a daughter who was trained but if was playing would have accidents. We didn't call them accidents and she did get spanked. Then for a week or so she would be called into the bathroom every hour or so and strapped in the potty. If she went, fine but if she didn't we would make her sit for about fifteen minutes. The message was if you won't interrupt your play we will.

Can't say we ever had diapers threatened.
 
I honestly cant say I remember anybody that has ever stayed with me or vice versa being in potty training, only a family member (a cousin or nephew or something along those lines) that was probably 4 or 5 in the early 2000s that my older sister had tried Potty Training and failed, so he was put back into diapers and the parents seemed lazy with changing him when he was wet or pooped.
 
Well that is a generational difference. Unless he had a medical problem, we would have had him trained before 2 1/2. It takes work and patience and endurance and some times doing the distasteful. And now with disposables it is too easy to just wait until he decides. But you are wasting a ton of money and depriving him the sense of accomplishment they get when they are trained.
 
The way it sounds like, you were spanked on loaded pants. My mother was very adverse to that. She said it just makes clean up harder. While you were on your back and cleaned she could hold your ankles and burn up your bottom. That was the only time she spanked in that position, normally it was over the lap. When I was older, you were required to bend over a chair to be paddled.


Mom swatted me, but I honestly don't remember her making the mess any worse. The last time I had a messy accident was when I was close 9 or 10 years old. At this age, I never had accidents, but on one occasion in the fall, I went to a friends house after school. His home wasn't far from my school, but in the opposite direction from my home. So I was over a mile from home. I suddenly needed to poop, and I was always weird about using other peoples bathrooms for poop. So I decided to ride my bike home. I didn't make it, and my mom knew something was wrong when I came in the house walking funny.

She immediately took me to the bathroom, spanked me, threatened me with the diaper treatment. She cleaned me as I described and yes, she did hold my ankles up in the air. It was weirdly like getting a diaper change.
 
Spanking in the "diaper position" for boys is risky. You could hit boy parts. My boy parts work so mom managed to avoid them. Sorry girls but it isn't a problem to spank you in that position.
 
woodenpotty said:
Well that is a generational difference. Unless he had a medical problem, we would have had him trained before 2 1/2. It takes work and patience and endurance and some times doing the distasteful. And now with disposables it is too easy to just wait until he decides. But you are wasting a ton of money and depriving him the sense of accomplishment they get when they are trained.

It definitely is a Generational difference issue, the approach these days is to wait for signs that the child may actually be ready and able and to focus more on rewarding them when they succeed than to punish them when they fail, at times though it comes down to either the parents not really wanting to put forth the effort or kids that don't seem to care an awful lot if they are in Diapers, even if they wet or messed themselves.

With my Uncle and his wife they waited until their kids were past 4 to start potty training and would give the kids the option of going to the bathroom, but they were more interested in playing and not into going to the bathroom in the potty; I think my Aunt and her husband had waited until closer to 3 or 3 and 1/2 before starting to potty train their older son.

I had watched an episode of one of those nanny shows and this kid in one episode was around 3 and he knew exactly when he had to go to the bathroom (at least for #1) and would ask his parents to put a diaper on him instead of going to the bathroom; on the UK version there were parents that would diaper up the kids at night and the kids didn't even want to be diapered at night, but the parents kept doing it anyways.
 
My mother used to say it is as much parent training as it is child training.
 
Potty training in the 50s sounds pretty awful, makes me glad I wasn't around for it and turned out a child of the 90s instead.
 
It was a different time and they did things differently. Everything for children was a lot more disciplined (and for adults, I guess as I wasn't one then). I help at my grandson's elementary school. This line up would not be possible, especially with just one adult present. In the 1940s 95% of children were spanked. And don't forget the adults were children of the depression, when life was incredibly hard. That followed by more tough times with WW II. As a child I didn't resent all of this, as every other kid I knew had similar experiences. It is that "universal" effect that makes it not a problem. The real key to whether it became abuse was did you feel like this was done in love and that the wanted you to turn out well. We have enough people that tell stories of abuse (and it was) because whatever happened came not from love but hate. And there were also some wonderful things about the era.school.jpg
 
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