Switching your fetish focus

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GeraldRoss

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  1. Diaper Lover
Now, the name of the thread is rather strange, but I don't know how else to call this.

The question is, has anyone intentionally and successfully switched the focus of their fetish for diapers so, that they are comfortable with it? Like, from wearing and using diapers to watching images and videos or caring for someone who wears?

The problem is, I'm a DL and I get simple physical pleasure from wearing and wetting. But this conflicts greatly with my mental image of myself.

The typical answers for such problems are usually something like "accept it as part of yourself" and so on, but that won't work for me.
My mental image of an "all-functional killing machine" and my usual lifestyle are the complete opposite of my desires for wearing and lack of control. So I know I can't have both.

But since I've already tried (as did many others, I think) to resist DL's desired. No success.
And I am thinking of trying to compromise — instead of wearing etc. could I, perhaps, actively collect diaper pictures, write stories and maybe someday find a girl, who, for any reason, wears diapers and take care of her?
What is your opinion on that "plan"?
 
I’ve had many friends that turned there primary DL focus to secondary and got into rope activities, learning how to tie and hang safely. Lots of women enjoy the rope stuff.
 
NeverKnow said:
Well, I don't see what option you have other than trying. If it's worked for someone else, that doesn't mean it'll work for you.

Personally, I only had an interest in ABDL 'media' (pictures, stories) when I was not wearing diapers. Now that I have diapers, I don't care about any of that. That is how I prefer it. I would rather just be able to put on a diaper and get on with life than focus more of my attention on ABDL media and fantasies.

Anyway, you're not unique, especially among men, in sensing that your desires conflict with your self-image. Everyone wants to seem in control and on top of things. But what really does that imply about wearing diapers? Nothing, it seems to me.

NeverKnow said:
But what really does that imply about wearing diapers? Nothing, it seems to me.

Actually, quite a lot. I'm heavily into martial arts, parkour, climbing and other activities, that require acute dexterity and a lot of attention.

When I wear diapers, I'm much less agile than without them. Also, a lot of my attention gets focused on them, either as a result of pleasure or because of wetting.

That's why wearing greatly hinders many things, that are important to me. But I am positive, that I'll never be able to shake this fetish off completely... So...
 
Cant say from personal experience so much but my guess would be that many do this successfully to an extent. Compromise is what I am getting at. With all kinks the fantasy rarely meets with reality and we are forced to compromise in some way to make it fit our real life obligations. So instead of being a full time AB we settle for play time. Not quite totally changing the focus but it's one way we are able to bring our fantasy world together with our real world.
 
NeverKnow said:
But you don't have to wear all the time.
Yes, true, but that's exactly the problem. That self-image I spoke about earlier is with me all the time, even when I'm, like, sitting in front of the computer. And I can't do anything about it...
 
Think how you might reconcile yourself if you were suddenly an amputee. This might, in fact, be at odds with your self image but it's also a fact that you'd have to accept and adapt to. I think this is similar. I have seen reports of people whose fetishes change over time but rarely at their own instigation. I understand your internal conflict and sympathize but that sympathy doesn't change what is. Adapt to what is and there can be personal growth. Burying your head in the sand or hoping you can change strikes me as ultimately unproductive.
 
This might not be the sort of thing you're looking for, but for example, this guy was one of the great Viking Warriors:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ivar_the_Boneless

They carried him into battle on a pallet. And he usually won.

I've read on a few sites speculating FDR was Incontinent due to Polio, and he led the US in its largest scale war.

Samuel L. Jackson, the baddest motherfucker if there ever was one, is also not shy about talking about his Incontinence and use of Incontinence products on set.

Just as someone who lacks that control by default, I've done some research on it. Just saying that the image and the diapers don't have to be in conflict necessarily.
 
pampers4U said:
I’ve had many friends that turned there primary DL focus to secondary and got into rope activities, learning how to tie and hang safely. Lots of women enjoy the rope stuff.

??????? I'm 58, you just lost me. Can you give me the "G" rated explanation of what you just said?
 
littlemoosey said:
pampers4U said:
I’ve had many friends that turned there primary DL focus to secondary and got into rope activities, learning how to tie and hang safely. Lots of women enjoy the rope stuff.

??????? I'm 58, you just lost me. Can you give me the "G" rated explanation of what you just said?

I assume he's referring to diapers being used to assist in bondage sessions, where first bondage was added to the diapers, and then later they switches roles and diapers were being added to the bondage.
 
bambinod said:
I assume he's referring to diapers being used to assist in bondage sessions, where first bondage was added to the diapers, and then later they switches roles and diapers were being added to the bondage.

Thanx Bambinod, to continue, "HANGING"???? I am now envisioning being diapered and somehow being suspended from the ceiling? It does not sound comfortable.

Hmm. Ill just take laying there in my diapers, "untied", looking up at my beautiful wife as she rubs my tummy with the silky side of my blanket, "blue".

Please expand on the the "hanging" I'm curious.
 
littlemoosey said:
I am now envisioning being diapered and somehow being suspended from the ceiling? It does not sound comfortable.

There are such bondage games for sure. But they aren't always about hanging. I haven't tried them myself (although I think I might want someone to tie me up at least once [emoji76]), but for some bondage is a way to get immense pleasure, especially when they get tied up, unable to move and hung up, spinning (or not) helplessly.
 
As for the original topic, why do you want to do that?
I mean, I've been incontinent most of my life, but it never prevented me from leading a very active lifestyle. And I certainly never saw this as an impediment. In fact, however weird it may sound, I never actually thought of incontinence and wearing diapers as of something special. Only as I went to school I was made to realise, that most people around are different. So I don't really see, how wearing diapers may conflict with any kind of self-image. Just keep doing what you like!
 
littlemoosey said:
Thanx Bambinod, to continue, "HANGING"????

They usually suggest that diaper are "a good way to extend bondage sessions". IE no "ok timeout, you need to untie me for a minute I have to pee!"

Nope. That's why you're wearing diapers. Now, where were we...
 
Ok thank you for the clarifications. Im learning more and more each day.
 
You mentioned, I believe, that you have an interest in martial arts. Undoubtedly then, you're familiar with the notion of yin/yang, and the benefits of having your life be in balance.

Perhaps you might look at your diaper desires, and the feelings of softness and/or helplessness that they engender, as a way of balancing the "all-functional killing machine" part of your life. Perhaps it's your psyche's way of trying to bring balance to your life. Resisting this might lead to less-than-optimal results. It's also possible that by giving in to these desires from time to time might actually make you better at the other side of your life.

It sounds like wearing 24/7/365 probably doesn't fit your desired lifestyle at this point, but that doesn't/shouldn't mean you can't set aside time for diaper play as well. Maybe it's one weekend a month, or every Tuesday night, or whatever works for your schedule. Maybe you're super-ninja man during the day, and wear a diaper and a teenage mutant ninja turtle onesie to bed at night. Perhaps having a partner to play with would help...someone to reassure you that it's ok to let go from time to time and be passive.

Also realize that, should the need for emergency action arise, you can revert to "all-functional killing machine" mode in a moment, even if diapered, to handle business.

You're far from alone in this struggle to balance your external life with your internal one. Think of all the type-A, high-power businessmen, lawyers, etc. who go home, put on panties or a diaper, and a get a spanking from their wife as a way to balance out the dominant side of the personality, or as a way of relieving the stress of being in charge all the time. Those who are happiest find ways to bring balance. I hope you can find yours.

Hope this helps.
 
It's pretty important to be true to yourself but if you think that if this interest is harming your mental image of self then I would definitely see if you can shift your interest in a way that won't do this but will still give you a sense of fulfillment.

Maybe you could try taking baby steps to transform this behavior-like you could try to wear a diaper and not wet it and then another time just hold a diaper and appreciate it aesthetically but not wear it. Maybe look at pictures of adult diapers online and see what kind of feelings they evoke in you and how those make you feel afterwards when you are done looking at them.

Just slowly keep evolving the behavior into something you are comfortable with and satisfied with at the end of the day. Hope this helps! :smile:
 
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