How long did it take you to accept it?

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How long did it take to accept it? you make it sound like an award and theres me with no acceptance speach ready lol.
I had no choice as a child but i had support but now as an adult i have no embarassment if they have a problem with my condition THEY CAN TAKE A RUN AND JUMP FOR ALL I CARE! lol,
 
I first hide my small leaks then I bought small pads to cover just in case . then back in 2012 while working in London at omplyics driving athlics around in coach one day waiting at security check I could not wait and end results wet myself lucky I was in dark shorts I hoping no body notice but I had no choice stay in then .couple days after I heard other staff mention that a driver had wet self .I took action by going in a boots chemist and bought my first pull ups and I carried spare ones and when I bought then I had go through security checks and plus I had share a room one day a check a marine check my bag found my pull ups and said they use then on excise . when come back home I hide my pull ups just use pads and when I wet myself I make excuse I split my drink but I notice I was wetting my self at work driving bus more often and been to football match and wet myself and my son tease me .then I went to the doctors about it back in late 2015 they found I have enlarge prostrate and OAB as I live my auntie I came out to my family and the mother of my children that I need to use nappies and pads my family support me and my auntie under stood that if my nappies leaked or my pads she never moan .but now I worked out which pads I use I don't worry now if just about go in town or know where my toilets I use my good small pads hold modrate amount if I in work driving my bus it could be hours before you use a toilet I wear my big pads and if had water infection I wear a nappy if go out for a drink use a nappy .I first went to store back end 2015 as I had more encourage to ask for help which products to use as I found boots was not good enough for me so they went through with options like pants with the pads in reuse not good idea for she said then show me different size pads and nets to hold then in and about water proof pants and then on to nappies as she asked what I was like at night time keep getting up she explain lot of men even young men buy nappies to wear bed so get good night sleep at first bit strange to wear no I don't worry and got like wear my nappies to bed and even if I go out . I even where some form pads to hospital and even worn large ones when I had my ct scan as liked to a nurse about lack bins in the men,s toilet she replied use disable one and if anybody chanllage me why use a disable toilet tell its not there business and I notice now Tesco put on the disable toilet not all disable is noticeable

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I don't like tab style diapers Slomo!, I can't twist, they itch me and I end up sweating a lot when I go out for inline skating.
Because I can't find men's protective on my size I'm currently using Tena stylish underwear
 
I only accepted my bedwetting when I got adequate diapers and was able to sleep the night in comfort.

I started wetting in high school. At first, it was awful, waking up in a soaked bed in the middle of the night, having to shower and change and launder my pyjamas and the bedclothes. When it got to be every night, my mom suggested that I wear a diaper to bed. I didn't know diapers existed in that size, but I readily agreed.

The disposables that were available (Depends and Attends) were useless. I soaked right through them as if I wasn't wearing a diaper at all. My mother made me cloth diapers and I got plastic pants. It took a while before I got the absorbency right. Once I had a diaper that didn't soak through to the bed, and got into the habit of efficiently diapering and changing and cleaning myself, I pretty much forgot all about the fact that I wet the bed.

It was only when I was away from home that I thought about it at all.
 
I still struggle with accepting it from time to time, but I had a big breakthrough a couple years ago.

So I was on my university cross country team, and when I know I'm going to something that includes me having to be in my underwar I try to wear normal underwear and pray that I don't have an accident. One day after a team meeting my coach took the team to the PT center/gym for an unnanounced physical. All the teams were there and we all had to strip down. there was no way getting around it and I almost through up from anxiety, but before I knew it I was suddenly in a gymnasium in nothing but my welness superio brief surrounded by athletes in normal underwear. I got lots of questions about it, but no one was mean. They were mostly apologetic. That being said from that point on the whole school knew I wore diapers. I was ocassionally teased but it was always in a light hearted way and people would also bring it up every now and then in a matter of fact way but I was never bullied for my disability (I can't say the same for high school, that's another story.) Also the nursing students were obsessed with me. They all wanted to know what made me incontinent, what my routine was, and if I could be a subject for what ever paper or project they were working on. Also my coach and the campus PT would mention that I wear, like whenever I needed an ice bath they'd tell me to strip and say "I don't care about your diaper."

so what helped me accept it was not having my dilemna ignored by those who knew about it, but having said people know about it in a "matter of fact" way if that makes any sense.
 
LonelyFOX said:
I don't like tab style diapers Slomo!, I can't twist, they itch me and I end up sweating a lot when I go out for inline skating.
Because I can't find men's protective on my size I'm currently using Tena stylish underwear

What diapers have you tried? Based on the itching and sweating, it sounds like you have only ever used thin cheap ones. If so, thrn no wonder you hate them. I hate cheap diapers too. Try actually using premium diapers, they are much better.
 
My experience has been somewhat like izzywop’s. High school was a nightmare. I became incontinent as a result of a surgical mishap when I was 14. And my peers in high school taunted me endlessly about my diapers. However, people were much kinder in university. I lived in a dorm, and the guys who lived in the same dorm suite with me knew about my diapers, occasionally kidded me a bit about them, but were good natured about it. Since university, I have kept my need for diapers a private matter (private but not really secret). My closest friends and associates know, but it’s a medical matter and nobody gives me a hard time.
 
I've tried tranquility diapers, Tena, attends, abena and I sweat a lot when I wear them.
With tab style diapers I feel more depressed and I have issues when putting them on and the tabs get loose when fastening and I can't pull them up and down like the women's protective underwear.
 
LonelyFOX said:
I've tried tranquility diapers, Tena, attends, abena and I sweat a lot when I wear them.
With tab style diapers I feel more depressed and I have issues when putting them on and the tabs get loose when fastening and I can't pull them up and down like the women's protective underwear.

Part of your problem is you are using cheaper diapers. The thinner the diaper, the less they can absorb sweat. The sweat quickly builds up, and causes you to sweat more. My suggestion, try a better diaper.
 
My last post "but was still putting on a pad just in case..." - I guess I havent yet, I couldn't write diaper. I wear a diaper. I wear a diaper to work. Saying it makes my stomach hurt a little.
 
Regularnot said:
My last post "but was still putting on a pad just in case..." - I guess I havent yet, I couldn't write diaper. I wear a diaper. I wear a diaper to work. Saying it makes my stomach hurt a little.

It's ok to call them what they are. Better actually so you don't confuse others with thinking of actual pads.
 
I have been dealing with this for a few years now and still haven't been able to fully accept it. I try my best to go each day without the help of a diaper. I have a 1 and a half hour commute to work where there isn't any access to a bathroom. There have been days where I am sprinting to the bathroom after getting off the train and barely making it. The pain of holding it gets so unbearable. Not to mention the dampness in my underwear.

I have been in the process of getting a second opinion as my last doctor told me my medication is the cause of my OAB and UI. Yes diapers help my situation, but the embarrassment of it is hard.
 
iam32bit said:
I have been dealing with this for a few years now and still haven't been able to fully accept it. I try my best to go each day without the help of a diaper. I have a 1 and a half hour commute to work where there isn't any access to a bathroom. There have been days where I am sprinting to the bathroom after getting off the train and barely making it. The pain of holding it gets so unbearable. Not to mention the dampness in my underwear.

I have been in the process of getting a second opinion as my last doctor told me my medication is the cause of my OAB and UI. Yes diapers help my situation, but the embarrassment of it is hard.

Thanks for sharing how you feel. I also have OAB. Wearing 24/7, nobody has ever noticed that I am wearing diapers! It is much better to be safe and comfortable rather than worried and there is nothing to be ashamed of. All the best for your adjustment!


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I was amazed how cheap diapers were. The belted pads I use were ~$15 for 30. (just for accidents, so walmart assurance brand) - compare that to a single doctor visit at $300 - that 10 months supply! I spend more on the fiber pills I'm taking to stay regular. Of course IBS-D accident consequences are a LOT worse....
 
Ive been double incontinent since I was 11 (now 33) due to encephalitis and the fact of basically being put back in nappies at that age while still at school was soul destroying, took me ages to accept it (especially then being bullied because of it in secondary school) things then got worse later in life as I went in to retention and the hospital then preformed a bladder neck incision and sphincterotomy (caused to to have a meltdown and lost my career over it! but hey now I'm happy with life and because its being going on so long it now feels normal (if that makes sense)
 
It's taken me about eight years to accept that wearing diapers 24/7 is my normal now. The reason why it took so long is because my control steadily worsened month on month, and no-one knows exactly what is causing it, despite having had a number of tests done. I've come to the conclusion that my bladder control issues are linked to my neurological illness as the symptoms started about the same time. Because of the slow decline of control, I had no idea what was happening to my body and nor did anyone else, which was quite scary. I blamed myself for these issues at first, but I came to realise that none of this was my fault.

These days I'm fairly relaxed about wearing nappies and I don't mind if the top of my padding shows by accident, but I still struggle with dating for a number of reasons. My medical issues have caused me to form a highly negative view of myself, which I'm finding difficult to shake off, despite my best efforts to do so. I'm confident I'll get there one day though, but it's going to take some time.

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joelvc said:
Thanks for sharing how you feel. I also have OAB. Wearing 24/7, nobody has ever noticed that I am wearing diapers! It is much better to be safe and comfortable rather than worried and there is nothing to be ashamed of. All the best for your adjustment!

Exactly, it's much better to be caught wearing a diaper or nappy then go without and have an accident. Accidents are much harder to hide and change than a diaper.

If it helps, try to relax into your padding and if you have an accident, let the diaper do its job - and you can carry on doing yours.

Breathe Deep, Seek Peace
 
I tried to go back to underwear and a pad. I am going on vacation for a week, and wanted to see if I could control leaks and try to hold it. I cannot hold it for long and have had to make 10+ trips to the bathroom but only peeing a little. very frustrating. I am back to wearing a diaper 24/7
 
Been 31 years since I went back to diapers as an Autistic with Cerebral Palsy.
I got tired of the internal war to "hold it all in" to not have accidents.
My bladder control was never that good from age 4 in 1962 until 1987.
I just accepted that I "finally failed at my toilet training".
 
ok so this may seem odd but had a motorcycle accident 2 years ago with internal injuries to the bladder and a few other things. left me urinary incontinent. like no control. Had a catheter for 2 months and decided that diaper would be a better choice. took 3 months and about 5 different kids of diapers before I found a fit and absorbency that was good enough. being incontinent the one thing you ned is to feel confident with the correct diaper. once found, It took 3 more months to get used to diapering 3 times a day. Then it just became routine. Incontinence for me is a life time problem. I had to keep reinforcing that muddle through it. Some take longer so don't just take my example, I have a way of just making good what is good and making good to obstacles.
 
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