Wondering

So as many of us diapers are a must in my life! I believe one day I will never own a pair of underwear. I strongly live by the saying you only live once. But we as humans do have to keep from discomforting others. So dressing up as a little and going out in the world is not practical. But wearing under every day clothing is fine by me.
I have been married for 21 years and in the last year my little/ DL has really come out. My wife does not participate but has no problem with me wearing at home. She says just not in public. Yes I strongly agree with you need to help each other’s needs. This is where the wondering enters.
Is there something wrong with me or my relationship? I don’t care to have sex. Yep that’s right I said it. Is this due to her not participating in my needs which closes me off. But I feel it is putting a lot of stress on her because what normal person doesn’t need sex? I feel that maybe I should let her go live her life because I can’t meet her needs.

So is this anything heard before of sex drive disappearing? I feel I need a friend to hang with and with same interest as I. Life is getting younger for me...

Your wife is falling for the old "what will the neighbors think". The problem with this is- they won't. As long as you wear a diaper under your clothes, and don't make it obvious, then wearing a diaper in public is just fine. After all,
Some incontinent people like me wear thick premium diapers all the time without anyone being the wiser.

I think there is nothing wrong with wearing every day. I have also seen lots of videos of people who go Little in public. I find I can be Little in traditionally boys clothes easier than I could in girls. But I have done it before! The most obvious part for me is the paci. Everything else is just “cute.” As for sex in your relationship, you were exploring some possible reasons why you felt more closed off and I think it’s worthy to keep exploring those.

Little Andrea I’m wowed that you experience the same feelings. Wowed in a good way that I’m not the only. My thoughts exactly right after we get done I’m like yes that should take care of her for a few days. No not a fetish thing because I don’t care about sex. But is asexual more common in women than men. Why I ask is you always hear the male saying she’s not giving me enough. I very seldom hear a woman say that.
Slomo I have tried to explain to her that she thinks she can tell because she knows what I’m wearing. I feel the same in that who is looking to see if you are wearing? Unless your part of this group.

dlwillow,

Well if you are ever entering a point where you feel like it is inevitable that you are going to bring up this view to your wife, I would suggest that you should ask to have this conversation in the room with a marriage Councillor, if you are feeling serious about it. 21 years of a relationship is a lot of investment and it would be a shame if things came out wrong on the topic line of seeing other people.

I think you have legitimate concerns and that your and her needs are both important, as well as that we only live once. It just seems like risky business to ever be bringing up. But that is without knowing what your wife is actually like.

Only you know best for yourself, but please do your best to not undervalue her role in your life or your role in hers. Not saying you are, but best to work on this carefully.

Find out what you can about your inner feelings on how much you need what you aren't getting, and how much she needs what she isn't getting, then see if it warrants bringing up the topic. The grass isn't always greener on the other side, but if the field is barren over here then maybe it is worth the risk, and yet maybe it is not.

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In my opinion with regard to your being 'closed out' because she is less involved in it. I'd say there is a good chance that mentally you are responding that way. I'd say it is understandable but it isn't anybody's fault. She doesn't really know how to be a part of that life, and it may mentally confuse her enough that she doesn't want to approach that topic. in the mean time you are feeling a little disappointed that this very intimate part of yourself hasn't been embraced, rather than just accepted. Maybe if you can find out something about her that is similar in that you don't quite understand it but you know it is important to her, and find out how you can embrace it. Maybe that will help her feel more interested in finding a way to embrace your love of diapers.

I like what Tyger said. The biggest issue that I see is the sexual/intimacy problem. After 22 years of marriage, we do tend to get uninspired with one another. It sounds like you are making an effort, but sex ought to be enjoyable for the both of you. If not, you should discuss this. If you are seriously seeking out others who also wear diapers, would you be alright with your wife seeking out another male partner who would meet her sexual needs? If not, imagine how she would feel. Marriage counseling might be a good idea.