That stupid shame and fear

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Makubird

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  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
  3. Little
Just writing to purge my frustration...
(Not sure if this is translated correctly but I think you will understand what I mean).

I went to buy some cute socks today so I looked at the children's and women's department of several stores. Nothing wrong with that but I felt like an imposter or some pervert. And was constantly afraid of being 'caught' by the personnel or by someone I know. Thinking of excuses and explanations in case someone would 'expose' me.

I know these are irrational thoughts but it is so difficult not to think that way. And this was only about socks! Haven't had the courage yet to go shopping for other cloths.

I wish one day we ABDL could just say "Hi, I was looking for some cute children's socks for myself, which ones do you think are the cutest? And where can I find the pacifiers?". Not sure if that day will ever come...


I did find my socks by the way :smile1:
 
Hi Makubird,

I’m glad you still bought the socks! I’m finding more and more most people don’t notice or care. For all they know it’s for a child or niece or nephew and anyway who has time to stop a grownup from buying cute socks? 😉 Especially when the store still gets their money.

But I understand... this is why most of my purchases are over the internet and why I’m eternally grateful that the internet exists!

Keep being you.
 
I understand too.

But with practice, it gets better. I get all my socks from the women's department now and hardly bat an eye.
 
sometimes the easiest way to get in the pool is to dive in all the way, get the socks, get the pacifier, get some pulups, you don't have to elaborate anything, it's no ones business but your own. Its easy to reply "I know this but... insert pointless paranoia reason..." DONT
 
I'll buy a cute outfit, a sucky and maybe a bottle or two, and then my 'adult' diapys. If the cashier gives me an odd look, I'll say something stupid like "If you can sell me diapers that fit fine, why can't I get a bigger pacifier or just one size bigger in a skirt-all?" I really don't care why or how much someone else may care.
 
I think we've all dealt with this form of shame at one time or the other and yes, it is incredibly stupid because most of the time people don't care enough to even ask any questions.

I always got beet red, I would pace up and down the aisle, I felt like someone was watching me and would say something, but with the exception of one isolated situation, every time I made it up to the register whether I was carrying a package of depends, a rattle, a pacifier or some other babyish item no one asked any questions, I made my purchase and I went home and enjoyed.

If for whatever reason I decide to buy a baby item in a store nowadays it doesn't even phase me, I go to the aisle, have a look around, I pick something up and I buy it, no fuss, no muss, no embarrassment. These things just become easier over time.

Personally though, I much prefer buying my items online now, this avoids even the slightest chance of being caught, most places ship discretely and even if they don't it's left in front of my apartment door, in the mailroom or at the UPS down my street where I can pick it up on my own time.
 
I usually end up shopping so I end up buying my wife's tampons, so buying diapers isn't much of a stretch--neither does buying whatever else my wife needs.
 
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