Advice wearing in front of your kids

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YorkshireDL

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  2. Diaper Lover
Hi all

I have not posted in a long time I wanted to to ask you all for some advice I have been a diaper lover for about 7 years now recently me and my wife has been talking and now our daughter is 6 almost 7 we are starting to teach her about privacy my wife used to diaper me in front of her all the time

But now she understands that daddy wears nappies as I said above we now don't do it in front of her I am conserned that this will have an affect on her later on in life as the chances are that she will remember this for the rest off her life

What I wanted to know if anyone else has any experience of this been a abdl for a long time and had a similar exspereance and how it affected then children

As I was growing up my parents were very open walking around naked and such like which for talking with my wife was a bit strange and when I say it is strange they did this into my teens I mean what mother says to her son's your much bigger than your father when you are young teen and woke up with morning glory

I am worried that this will have an affect on her mental health as she gets older i hope that it will just help her become a more understanding person

I am almost padded 24/7 due to my back causing me to leak as i have 4 buldging disks in my back so I were pull ups during the day and full nappies during the night

Please let me know you thought and exspereance In this matter

Thanks you all for your help

Yorkshire

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At her age I definitely think teaching her about privacy is a good thing, with most kids they start to get a bit independent and want some privacy themselves as well.

It’s funny my closest cousins grew up with their parents being often naked and they are fine, interesting to find some of them are the same and some are very fastidious about keeping private private but none of them have ever made any noises that they were damaged in any way by their upbringing.

We do have a friend though who’s family are about as lovely as you can imagine and very conscious of all social norms including privacy, acceptance etc and she has trauma issues from things she witnessed as a child so maybe it’s an individual thing.

The only thing I would be careful about is that she knows not to talk about your situation with her friends at school etc as if she says something innocently to her friends you can bet those kids will say something to their parents and then you will find some background chatter from alarmists putting your daughter in the category of “weird parents, don’t let your kids stay over there” which for sure won’t do her any favours. Sorry to sound alarmist but we have kids and for sure we have been wary of some families both correctly it turns out and maybe not so correctly.

I have never displayed my nappies infront if my girls even when I was 24/7 I tried to be discreet and had the “private is private” approach.
 
You treated diapers as a natural thing that you need and your daughter is now older and your being changed should be private, just as you should be teaching her that she should be getting dressed in private. I don't see that this would be damaging to her. What is appropriate changes as our kids get older.
 
I don't have any personal experience in this matter, though I do work with kids ranging from age 5-17 years old and am well on my way to becoming a teacher. I hope my opinion can offer some insight.

I think you are on the right track with talking to your daughter about privacy. It allows her to understand, want and practice her own privacy which is always important because it enables children (and adults) to be able to set boundaries on themselves for their own safety and comfort. So long as you are open with your daughter about why you HAVE to wear diapers (and not necessarily why you WANT to wear them) then she will grow up understanding that certain people have certain medical needs based on the way their body works. That won't cause mental issues, but might encourage compassion and empathy.

That being said, if you emphasize to her how much you love to wear diapers, then that may cause some issues as she talks to her friends about your preferences. I guarantee, kids will have their own opinions on the subject and you will not be looked upon with favorable eyes if that's your emphasis when discussing this with your child. Just focus on it as a medical need. She doesn't have to be present for your diaper changes, but she also won't just forget about the whole ordeal, especially if you continue to wear. So I would say combat misinformation with information and educate her on what's going on. Kids can be cruel when they are surrounded with negative outlooks, misinformation or humor at someone's expense. Teach her compassion and understanding and be open to talking to her about your situation so that she doesn't let her curiosity push her towards asking her friends to help her understand the situation. Because that's the alternative option to a curious child.
 
My kids know I need diapers. And kids will tell about it in school. But nothing became of it other than staff donating me some they used for passed love ones.
 
ORBaby said:
You treated diapers as a natural thing that you need and your daughter is now older and your being changed should be private, just as you should be teaching her that she should be getting dressed in private. I don't see that this would be damaging to her. What is appropriate changes as our kids get older.

Seconded!

Be matter-of-fact about your diapers. Teach your daughter the difference between private and hidden. Your diaper changes are private, but there's no reason to keep them hidden.
 
I can't offer any better advice than what has already been posted. Only to say that even if you didn't change in front of your daughter she probably would have eventually found out anyway. I recently started wearing because of urge incontinence issues. My daughters are 9, 6 and 5. I came home one day right after work and was playing with them and my oldest daughter saw what I was wearing and made a comment. They quickly forgot about it, or so I thought, and a few days later in a conversation my oldest brought it up and made a joke. Thankfully the others didn't hear it and I pulled her aside and had to explain to her what was happening. She understood and hasn't said anything about it since. Kids can be amazing observant.
 
Thank you everyone for you responses you have confirmed what I thought and in some of the responses there is a lot more to what I was saying about my upbringing

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While things lije changing should be private, your children should know not to be ashamed of diapers, and not only babies and the elderly need diapers.
 
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