New to this and Looking for advice

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Sometimes when the wife and I are out, and I tell her I need to pee. She asks me why I didn't wear my diaper. Sometimes she will feel my ass to see if I'm padded.
I only occasionally wear diapers when we are out running around. I do like to wear a diaper to bed a few nights a week. She doesn't seem to mind at all, but does warn me that sometime I might forget that I don't have one on and wet the bed.
The other night I sent her a picture of my diaper I was wearing to bed and warned her to delete it so no one else would see it. She said no, she was going to look at it while she pleased herself. I guess I should clarify that I am working away from home for a few months.
Not to rub it in but I am a pretty lucky guy.
 
Stich said:
I'm new to this whole diaper idea. My boyfriend wears quite often. After being together for almost 3 years, about 6 months ago he finally came out with the truth about it. Which I am very proud of him for doing so cuz I get that this is something that is not easy to talk about. I guess I'm just looking for advice on how to accept it more then I do. I just feel like its taking away attention from me. Which I know he's trying not to be that way but I don't know how other way to look at it. I have used a diaper a couple of times. Not the worst thing ever, just something that I couldn't use all the time. How could I make him more comfortable/happy around me? What can I do to make him have a good time?
Any advice is greatly appreciated.
Thanks in advance :)

1. Please don't feel like his "kink" in any way reflects on any "lack" or "inability" on your own side. ABDL tendencies are a bit like being left-handed. They're kind of built-in. Probably 95% of us knew we were ABDL's by the time we hit puberty, probably 90% of us have tried one or more times to "can" this behavior and failed each time, and probably 95% or more of us will carry this along with us until about the time our bodies are so old, that they will physically need diapers again, or at least til when we lose our ultimate control over life itself (we die.) So if you were hanging out with someone left handed, it really shouldn't in any way make you feel either good or bad about yourself. You certainly sound like a good caring and wonderful person, and please don't allow your friend's "left-handedness" make you feel in any way like you aren't.

2. While he may be into ABDL to some extent, and you may be primarily into more "traditional" sex, realize that the best relationships go beyond just the physical. Certainly it is important that basic physical needs for closeness, intimacy, and yes pleasure are met for both partners, but a physical closeness does not necessarily create a true "heart closeness." A true "heart closness" will carry you always. A physical closeness can carry you only when "the conditions are right."

3. Your acceptance of both yourself and of him as worthy, good and true folks, just as you both are, might help both of you to enjoy each other a little more. Your encouragement of him to learn to know both yourself, and his own self, while being fair and loving to both, if that is possible, might help, just as we all try to learn to truly understand and love both ourselves, and those who are closest to us.

4. If either you or he find that all of these needs are not able to be met in one another, then there are always other fish in the sea, and you sound like you are probably both fine and good folks who would weather a storm well.
 
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Stich said:
I'm new to this whole diaper idea. My boyfriend wears quite often. After being together for almost 3 years, about 6 months ago he finally came out with the truth about it. Which I am very proud of him for doing so cuz I get that this is something that is not easy to talk about. I guess I'm just looking for advice on how to accept it more then I do. I just feel like its taking away attention from me. Which I know he's trying not to be that way but I don't know how other way to look at it. I have used a diaper a couple of times. Not the worst thing ever, just something that I couldn't use all the time. How could I make him more comfortable/happy around me? What can I do to make him have a good time?
Any advice is greatly appreciated.
Thanks in advance :)

Hi Stich,

Everyone in this thread has done a very nice job of giving you different ways to approach this with your boyfriend. I can't speak for everyone, but the fact that you are proud of him and that you are trying to make him more comfortable and happy around you is all most of us could ask for. I don't know where your boyfriend falls along the ABDL spectrum, but if like me he is more AB, then simple things like babytalk or gentle nurturing or even being the "big spoon" can be very stimulating.

Regarding the competition issue that has been brought up, it can be a real feeling. One of the issues I had with my ex is that she was okay with my ABDL only if it was out of sight, out of mind and believed my ABDL was my mistress. I say this as someone who really tried to give her what she needed and I wasn't looking for anything beyond the simple things I mentioned above as well as the occasional diaper fantasy/role play. It is something for you and your boyfriend to discuss as others have said - if you feel you're in competition with the fetish, you should talk about that. But, from my perspective, most of us just want a partner like you who is understanding and who genuinely cares for us having this need met in some way. Perhaps the truest thing to say is this is a need that will get met alone or with you. If it can be met with you, and if (important!) your needs are also being met, then I think that takes a lot of the "mistress" and "competition" aspects out of it and creates a stronger bond.

I think he's lucky to have you and if he loves you, he probably does feel lucky.

Be well.
 
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