Werid thoughs and tharpiat

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makena43

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  1. Diaper Lover
The other day ago I said to myself after I masturbating and it was ,"I am not ashamed to be a diaper lover". So did I finally acept myself or make my self feel better after masturbating? Then I ask myself what happens now if I wear diapers and I still feel nervous of being discovered?

Next thing is the tharpist. I am going to have a new tharpist and she doesn't know about diapers. I think I need advice on self esteem. Self accept and. Maybe masturbating. And diapers. What thing should. I not talk about?
 
Therapists are there to talk about whaterver YOU want to talk about. It isn't like this is a test you can study for, nor cheat on by getting answers from us first.

The best advice I can give is don't hold back any secrets from your therapist. They can't help you if they don't know what's bothering you.

Ps. And glad to hear you're FINALLY starting to come to accept diapers are a need for you (both physically AND mentally), as well as something you enjoy.
 
But what happens if I wear in public and i am nervous is i still need more work on accepts and self esteem plus just doing it alot. Is talking to her about. Matbating okay? I don't. Think I will tell about. Diaper because she will say to quit it. I always prep by having questions or topics so I can spend the time wise and get all the help I can get from her
 
It's just underwear. I'm saying that bluntly because you need to hear it and repeat that to yourself. I wear every day now and the idea of putting on regular adult underwear is now what's weird and creepy. To me, regular underwear just isn't comfortable and I feel dishonest like I'm not really being myself if I were to go back to them. Also, I'd have to stop and ask myself why the hell I'm doing that. I get that diapers are a societal taboo but so F'ing what? To me the bigger taboo is denying who I am so to hell with what polite society thinks.

Unless you are an exhibitionist while out and about, which clearly you are not, there's nothing wrong with being different. If people find out and they try to shame you, you should be able to turn it on them and shame them right back for being intolerant jerks and harassing people over harmless traits is not cool.

Life is too short, man. Frank from Rocky Horror Picture Show was right. Don't dream it. Be it.
 
Thanks guys. I will try saying to myself it's just underwear. The turn around if found out will be hard. Since I am not good with thinking on the spot
 
That's why it's an ongoing process. I was nervous too. That's why I joined this site. I was weirded out by it. Scared it would come out and I felt shame and guilt. I've literally had to start repeating new positive thoughts to myself. Over and over. I still do it to this day. No shame, no guilt. Be who you are. And something I like to remember was an influential teacher I had in high school and how accepting and non-conventional she was. She was an inspiration to me and I sadly lost her in 2012. But I came to the realization that she would accept me for being ABDL and what's more, she would probably encourage me to live as I desire. I've always admired her philosophy and allowing myself to be ABDL is sort of my way of acknowledging the lessons she left me.
 
Sorry. For your loss. I will try your ideas today what about the tharpist your thoughs
 
I told a therapist long ago... I debated telling her for quite awhile, but then I decided that, if I was really serious about getting help with my relationship problems, she needed to know the whole picture. We talked a bit about it, and that was it. I'm sure the reason it never came up again was because it was inconsequential, in the grand scheme of things. My problem was more related to my choices, and my availability to be in a relationship, as well as the availability of the women I was choosing. It had nothing to do with my favorite method of masturbation, or the type of underwear I wore, or any sexual gratification I might have gotten from either. Because this is a choice so few make for themselves, it's outside the mainstream, and, thus, we, too, feel like we're outside the mainstream, when it comes to relationships, etc. We're not. We're just like everyone else, with little secrets & aspirations.
 
makena43 said:
But what happens if I wear in public and i am nervous is i still need more work on accepts and self esteem plus just doing it alot. Is talking to her about. Matbating okay? I don't. Think I will tell about. Diaper because she will say to quit it. I always prep by having questions or topics so I can spend the time wise and get all the help I can get from her
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If you get even a half-decent therapist, they will not tell you to quit. Especially when you tell them you have a real medical need for them. That would be just stupid for anyone to tell you that.

So what if you like diapers in addition to needing them. Yes you should mention diapers. They will help you get past this unfounded fear of yours.

And guess what, mastrubation isn't wrong either. It's kind of expected the two should eventually cross as well. Mastrubation and diapers do involve the same area of the body after all.

Now quit working yourself up into such a worry and go talk to your therapist. About it all.
 
If you have any worries about diapers or masturbation, then these are exactly the things you should discuss with your therapist. Your therapist is paid to be the person you can speak to about "weird stuff" that you can't or don't want to discuss with other people in your life. It's his/her job to listen to all that crazy shit you can't discuss with your mates.

Pretty much everyone masturbates, so there's nothing to be ashamed about. And I told my therapist about diapers, and he didn't bat an eyelid. He wasn't ABDL-aware, as such, but he instantly recognised it as a self-soothing behaviour. His only concern was in getting me to accept myself, realising that wearing diapers was okay, and that I should give more value to what I think than what (I fear) other people might think.

One of the first things my therapist said was that I probably wouldn't be able to completely eliminate the desire to wear diapers... but that was fine by me. I don't want to be someone I'm not.

Also, I have found that wearing in public is only worth it when I'm feeling really depressed or really chilled-out. Otherwise, the comfort they provide isn't enough to counteract the fear that someone might notice the bulge. So I very rarely have the inclination to wear outside the house.

If wearing in public is causing you anxiety, one way to deal with that is to increase your levels of self-acceptance to reduce your anxiety. Another is to simply not wear diapers in public. It's up to you. Anxiety is a bitch. I'd do anything to avoid it.
 
As I said in previous threads on this subject Medical Doctors and there facsimile thereof and therein are some of the if not the best Lie Detectors out there so Do not lie or make things up please. Be honest truthful and straight with them for your own good. Otherwise they can refuse service to you at anytime.
 
Now that I've been 24/7 for what, going on a few years now I think, I know I consider wearing normal underwear "weird", and anytime I'm forced to I can't stop thinking about when I'm going to be able to get home and change back into a nice thick diaper and relax.

Although it's become an everyday thing for me, it still never gets old. From time to time during the day I'll stop and think about what I'm wearing, and it always brings at least a little ray of sunshine to my mood. I might even make a discrete touch somewhere to provide a little additional input, feel my diaper line bulge under one of my butt cheeks as I walk down a hall, reach down and feel the padded bulge in the front where my diaper reaches my chair, or reach around my back and feel the ribbed waistband elastic beneath my shirt above my belt. (or even dip a hand briefly down in back to feel that smooth plastic shell below my shirt line, love that!)

And then I just go back to whatever it was I was doing, in a slightly better mood than before. Maybe ponder for a moment just how lucky I am to be able to wear diapers all the time, or how completely floored I would have been a decade ago to know that this day would come, or even thinking farther back how this whole "diapered lifestyle" of mine was "an impossible dream that could never possibly come true", and here I am now, "living the impossible dream". Wouldn't give it up for the world.

And how about those nights when I've pulled out a thick premium diaper for overnight? As I hold that diaper in my hands and can feel the thick crinkly goodness I'm about to experience, "WHAT would have gone through my mind when I was say, 15, if by some miracle this had been sitting on my nightstand when I walked into the room to get ready for bed?" What if it had been a whole bag of diapers? Like I said, living the dream, and don't you dare wake me up ;)
 
bambinod said:
Now that I've been 24/7 for what, going on a few years now I think, I know I consider wearing normal underwear "weird", and anytime I'm forced to I can't stop thinking about when I'm going to be able to get home and change back into a nice thick diaper and relax.

Although it's become an everyday thing for me, it still never gets old. From time to time during the day I'll stop and think about what I'm wearing, and it always brings at least a little ray of sunshine to my mood. I might even make a discrete touch somewhere to provide a little additional input, feel my diaper line bulge under one of my butt cheeks as I walk down a hall, reach down and feel the padded bulge in the front where my diaper reaches my chair, or reach around my back and feel the ribbed waistband elastic beneath my shirt above my belt. (or even dip a hand briefly down in back to feel that smooth plastic shell below my shirt line, love that!)

And then I just go back to whatever it was I was doing, in a slightly better mood than before. Maybe ponder for a moment just how lucky I am to be able to wear diapers all the time, or how completely floored I would have been a decade ago to know that this day would come, or even thinking farther back how this whole "diapered lifestyle" of mine was "an impossible dream that could never possibly come true", and here I am now, "living the impossible dream". Wouldn't give it up for the world.

And how about those nights when I've pulled out a thick premium diaper for overnight? As I hold that diaper in my hands and can feel the thick crinkly goodness I'm about to experience, "WHAT would have gone through my mind when I was say, 15, if by some miracle this had been sitting on my nightstand when I walked into the room to get ready for bed?" What if it had been a whole bag of diapers? Like I said, living the dream, and don't you dare wake me up ;)
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You said it! We're ABDL's (and variations of it here) and once you own and accept that, you realize that you can live the dream! The fact that we have so many choices in diapers, including ones that look like baby diapers, is amazing! They are made for us so why not use them?

I remember the fantasies I had growing up, wanting this taboo lifestyle but I never would have dreamed I actually could! Damn, seriously, once you accept this part of you, it frees the soul and lifts the heart. I have confidence in this lifestyle for the first time and the shame is gone! I'm proud that I stand up against my own fears and live as makes me happy. It takes huge courage to be 24/7 and that's courage I didn't know I had!
 
bambinod said:
Now that I've been 24/7 for what, going on a few years now I think, I know I consider wearing normal underwear "weird", and anytime I'm forced to I can't stop thinking about when I'm going to be able to get home and change back into a nice thick diaper and relax.

Although it's become an everyday thing for me, it still never gets old. From time to time during the day I'll stop and think about what I'm wearing, and it always brings at least a little ray of sunshine to my mood. I might even make a discrete touch somewhere to provide a little additional input, feel my diaper line bulge under one of my butt cheeks as I walk down a hall, reach down and feel the padded bulge in the front where my diaper reaches my chair, or reach around my back and feel the ribbed waistband elastic beneath my shirt above my belt. (or even dip a hand briefly down in back to feel that smooth plastic shell below my shirt line, love that!)

And then I just go back to whatever it was I was doing, in a slightly better mood than before. Maybe ponder for a moment just how lucky I am to be able to wear diapers all the time, or how completely floored I would have been a decade ago to know that this day would come, or even thinking farther back how this whole "diapered lifestyle" of mine was "an impossible dream that could never possibly come true", and here I am now, "living the impossible dream". Wouldn't give it up for the world.

And how about those nights when I've pulled out a thick premium diaper for overnight? As I hold that diaper in my hands and can feel the thick crinkly goodness I'm about to experience, "WHAT would have gone through my mind when I was say, 15, if by some miracle this had been sitting on my nightstand when I walked into the room to get ready for bed?" What if it had been a whole bag of diapers? Like I said, living the dream, and don't you dare wake me up ;)
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What a sicko! Pushing your perversions on others.

Seriously, what you have written there reads like accounts I have read of people wearing sexy (to them) underwear in regular life. It's a discreet, self-contained source of enjoyment and there's nothing wrong with it. I balk a bit at describing it as just another kind of underwear because it means much more to me than that but in point of fact, that's all it is. If it makes you feel better, go for it!

I feel like I'm running out of steam on my 24/7 stint. Maybe a few more weeks unless my feelings change. Still, it's been a fun addition to my year and I wouldn't trade it.
 
Trevor said:
What a sicko! Pushing your perversions on others.

Seriously, what you have written there reads like accounts I have read of people wearing sexy (to them) underwear in regular life. It's a discreet, self-contained source of enjoyment and there's nothing wrong with it. I balk a bit at describing it as just another kind of underwear because it means much more to me than that but in point of fact, that's all it is. If it makes you feel better, go for it!

I feel like I'm running out of steam on my 24/7 stint. Maybe a few more weeks unless my feelings change. Still, it's been a fun addition to my year and I wouldn't trade it.
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I think it helps me to think of them as just another kind of underwear because it helps destroy the feelings of weirdness, especially since I also wear 24/7. And since it IS only underwear I guess I don't understand why a 24/7 ABDL would suddenly go back to regular, restricting, uncomfortable, non-absorbant adult undies. Since I see it as "only underwear" and that sense of shame and guilt is gone, then why go back?
 
So back on topic.what methods do i use to fully accept diaper. Do I just say to myself diapers are underwear and wear diapers in public and that's all or is there another method.

I been thinking about my masturbating problem. Now maybe doing it at wrong time. For example when I need to go do chores and you do and realize I could have been done earlier. Next maybe its what I am watching or accepting a weird fantasy. The bad feeling is afterwards. Thank you guys so far.
 
I came to diapers very late in life as a census described "old" person.their use seems to have succeeded underwear fetishes. Move between pull-ups and tabs. I really have come to enjoy them pretty much day and night, in house or in public. but not exclusively. Did try locker room once, but it made me too nervous, and same with massage It's nice to sleep from 11 to 7, and sometimes even have room for more pee. My therapist doesn't even wan to talk about them, says its my business about what ever gives me comfort and pleasure. I find that diapers relax me when getting tense, or today when feeling sad on the anniversary of the death of a family member.
 
Tommycombs said:
I think it helps me to think of them as just another kind of underwear because it helps destroy the feelings of weirdness, especially since I also wear 24/7. And since it IS only underwear I guess I don't understand why a 24/7 ABDL would suddenly go back to regular, restricting, uncomfortable, non-absorbant adult undies. Since I see it as "only underwear" and that sense of shame and guilt is gone, then why go back?
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We're all different in this. I don't find diapers to be more comfortable in any conventional way. If not for how they made me feel in my head, I wouldn't want to wear them. I think that conflict is part of the appeal for me. I'm not alone in that but I think it's a minority ABDL view.

makena43 said:
So back on topic.what methods do i use to fully accept diaper. Do I just say to myself diapers are underwear and wear diapers in public and that's all or is there another method.

I been thinking about my masturbating problem. Now maybe doing it at wrong time. For example when I need to go do chores and you do and realize I could have been done earlier. Next maybe its what I am watching or accepting a weird fantasy. The bad feeling is afterwards. Thank you guys so far.
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Bearing that in mind to address makena43, I don't know if my approach is useful for you or not. What was most effective for me was embracing the fact that this was weird behavior. It's an odd desire. So what? It doesn't hurt anyone. It bring me considerable pleasure and when I leverage it properly, it contributes to good things in my life. I don't expect people who don't like it to really get it but it's my thing and I'm sure I'll never really understand some of the odd things others really enjoy (spectator sports for one). I don't owe the rest of the world normalcy. At absolute most, I'm obliged to provide an appearance of normalcy, and that's not too hard when it allows me to do my own thing as well.
 
Trevor said:
Bearing that in mind to address makena43, I don't know if my approach is useful for you or not. What was most effective for me was embracing the fact that this was weird behavior. It's an odd desire. So what? It doesn't hurt anyone. It bring me considerable pleasure and when I leverage it properly, it contributes to good things in my life. I don't expect people who don't like it to really get it but it's my thing and I'm sure I'll never really understand some of the odd things others really enjoy (spectator sports for one). I don't owe the rest of the world normalcy. At absolute most, I'm obliged to provide an appearance of normalcy, and that's not too hard when it allows me to do my own thing as well.
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Yep. You're only truly accountable to yourself. I consider myself a bit odd in that I've never placed exceptional value in others' opinions of me. I still try to avoid embarrassment, but for the most part I do what makes me happy. And I'm fortunate enough to be able to do most of the things that I'd like to do. If you have an opportunity to do what you enjoy, you should. Others' opinions be damned. (like trevor said, if it's not hurting anyone else, they're not entitled to an opinion in the matter)
 
I've had about ten hours with my new therapist. I just love her and I felt she could help me only after a few sessions. Yet I haven't mentioned my ABDLism at all. I don't only because that is not the reason I'm there. I'm transparent on moods and past abuse because that's my focus. If it comes up well I'll disclose for my sake.

Any reasonable therapist will not kick you to the curb for discussing your problem areas. They may refer you to someone else if they cannot meet your needs which is to your benefit anyways. I think telling them during your intake or sessions that diapers and masturbation is giving bad or confusing emotions then you should to help yourself by being upfront.

They aren't gonna shame you or berate you because of your lifestyle choice. If this was 40 plus years ago I wouldn't be able to say that with confidence. Training and licensing standards have improved considerably.

As far as wearing in public I don't see an issue only because it is under the clothes and most people aren't looking for a bulge they may notice it possibly but I learned if people are nasty and they cannot tease us about our nappies then they would find something else anyways. The loomies don't want us to be padded or be little because they are too darn afraid to be their own soul.

Peace friend. Hope all goes well.
 
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