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Thread: Favouritism in Families

  1. #1

    Post Favouritism in Families

    Now, let me start this off by saying that I know I am the least favourite in my family (I'm below the step kids too) and it fucking hurts. Being the least favourite means that I'm swept aside constantly; if something goes wrong, goes missing or the snacks in the house are eaten too fast, it is automatically my fault. The favouritism has become even more clear today than it ever has been:

    Both my sister and I are ill, different ailments, but still, none the less we are both sick, today, all whilst knowing that I am not 100% my ailment and I as a person have been:
    Shot down
    Told that I'm "overreacting" (this is the worst infection I have ever had and it's in my EYE!)
    Had contradicting statements thrown at me ("Go out and make some friends in the area Buster" I do what they ask and make a friend "That's weird...")
    That I "cant be that ill"

    whereas my older sister (who has a sore throat) has had:

    Nothing but mollycoddling
    Her food brought to her at the table (no matter how ill I am I never get that)
    Sympathy galore
    The day off (If I was sick mum would still force me to go to work don't have a job rn tho)

    And It's got me both angry and wondering...
    Has this favouritism affected my ABDL side? It that what started it? Am I ABDL because of favouritism?

    What're your two cents on this one? Did you deal with favouritism in your family life? Did that affect your ABDL side?

    This may just be the pain in my eye talking tho, but still, I want to know how you feel and what you think.

  2. #2

    Default

    psychology is very complicated, but one of the feelings associated with AB/DL for some studies are the feeling of "regression" begin protected, because the association of begin a baby with protection unconsciously, your abdl side come after or before?

    actually something similar happens to me, with my little brother, they reward he for things they punish me when i have the age of my little brother, and i can't say nothing against it.

    i don't know if i can,, but this si some "study" about ABDL behavior
    https://www.lehmiller.com/blog/2015/...tish-community

  3. #3

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by BusterBunny View Post
    Now, let me start this off by saying that I know I am the least favourite in my family (I'm below the step kids too) and it fucking hurts. Being the least favourite means that I'm swept aside constantly; if something goes wrong, goes missing or the snacks in the house are eaten too fast, it is automatically my fault. The favouritism has become even more clear today than it ever has been:

    Both my sister and I are ill, different ailments, but still, none the less we are both sick, today, all whilst knowing that I am not 100% my ailment and I as a person have been:
    Shot down
    Told that I'm "overreacting" (this is the worst infection I have ever had and it's in my EYE!)
    Had contradicting statements thrown at me ("Go out and make some friends in the area Buster" I do what they ask and make a friend "That's weird...")
    That I "cant be that ill"

    whereas my older sister (who has a sore throat) has had:

    Nothing but mollycoddling
    Her food brought to her at the table (no matter how ill I am I never get that)
    Sympathy galore
    The day off (If I was sick mum would still force me to go to work don't have a job rn tho)

    And It's got me both angry and wondering...
    Has this favouritism affected my ABDL side? It that what started it? Am I ABDL because of favouritism?

    What're your two cents on this one? Did you deal with favouritism in your family life? Did that affect your ABDL side?

    This may just be the pain in my eye talking tho, but still, I want to know how you feel and what you think.
    I could write a book on my life relating to this. Without going into all the details about which some members here have heard before, I was the last of four children. My father was abusive and I feared him. When my mother became pregnant with me, I was not a planned baby and the only reason I was born was because my mother was a Catholic and the church looked down on abortion. My father hated the church for that and took it out on me.

    I grew up with a life of abuse and always felt like the least loved, or more accurately unloved.

    What I've learned in life is that we cannot choose our family but we can choose the people we love. Family to me is not defined by blood, it is defined by the people who have cared for me and given me support throughout the years, which I have hopefully been able to reciprocate. Family to me were the friends I could open up to and confide about being gay. They were the ones who helped me get over alcoholism and rejoin the world. They were the people who supported my dream of going back to school and succeeding after living through depression while in a miserable job. They were waiting for me at the finish line when I ran my first marathon. And they pulled me through the trauma of a brutal assault that nearly killed me.

    To me, family are the people who would drop everything for you when you are in trouble, and you would do the same for them. They support you unconditionally yet they challenge you when they feel you are going down a wrong path. A family builds up your self-esteem and celebrates your achievements with you.

    As far as my abdl side, it happened because my father forced me into diapers at the age of six after a bedwetting accident. It was just one more way to humiliate me. As a result, my diaper fetish was already developing before I reached the age of seven.

  4. #4

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by BusterBunny View Post
    Now, let me start this off by saying that I know I am the least favourite in my family (I'm below the step kids too) and it fucking hurts. Being the least favourite means that I'm swept aside constantly; if something goes wrong, goes missing or the snacks in the house are eaten too fast, it is automatically my fault. The favouritism has become even more clear today than it ever has been:

    Both my sister and I are ill, different ailments, but still, none the less we are both sick, today, all whilst knowing that I am not 100% my ailment and I as a person have been:
    Shot down
    Told that I'm "overreacting" (this is the worst infection I have ever had and it's in my EYE!)
    Had contradicting statements thrown at me ("Go out and make some friends in the area Buster" I do what they ask and make a friend "That's weird...")
    That I "cant be that ill"

    whereas my older sister (who has a sore throat) has had:

    Nothing but mollycoddling
    Her food brought to her at the table (no matter how ill I am I never get that)
    Sympathy galore
    The day off (If I was sick mum would still force me to go to work don't have a job rn tho)

    And It's got me both angry and wondering...
    Has this favouritism affected my ABDL side? It that what started it? Am I ABDL because of favouritism?

    What're your two cents on this one? Did you deal with favouritism in your family life? Did that affect your ABDL side?

    This may just be the pain in my eye talking tho, but still, I want to know how you feel and what you think.
    I am more DL than AB for sure, and while I suffered much child abuse growing up (long story there), I don't think, in my case, that it was the cause of DL tendencies. They existed from the time I actually WAS in diapers at the age of 3, and probably have much more to do with transgenderism in my case.

    I am an only child, but my parents have often shot me down in much the same way, and trivialized everything up to and including my becoming suicidal ("Everybody feels that way"). It wasn't exactly favoritism... there wasn't anyone else to favor... it was just a lack of love and understanding.



    Quote Originally Posted by Starrunner View Post
    I could write a book on my life relating to this. Without going into all the details about which some members here have heard before, I was the last of four children. My father was abusive and I feared him. When my mother became pregnant with me, I was not a planned baby and the only reason I was born was because my mother was a Catholic and the church looked down on abortion. My father hated the church for that and took it out on me.

    I grew up with a life of abuse and always felt like the least loved, or more accurately unloved.

    What I've learned in life is that we cannot choose our family but we can choose the people we love. Family to me is not defined by blood, it is defined by the people who have cared for me and given me support throughout the years, which I have hopefully been able to reciprocate. Family to me were the friends I could open up to and confide about being gay. They were the ones who helped me get over alcoholism and rejoin the world. They were the people who supported my dream of going back to school and succeeding after living through depression while in a miserable job. They were waiting for me at the finish line when I ran my first marathon. And they pulled me through the trauma of a brutal assault that nearly killed me.

    To me, family are the people who would drop everything for you when you are in trouble, and you would do the same for them. They support you unconditionally yet they challenge you when they feel you are going down a wrong path. A family builds up your self-esteem and celebrates your achievements with you.

    As far as my abdl side, it happened because my father forced me into diapers at the age of six after a bedwetting accident. It was just one more way to humiliate me. As a result, my diaper fetish was already developing before I reached the age of seven.
    Dead on, my friend. Family is something acquired slowly over life, and does not involve blood relation whatsoever. I technically shouldn't have been born either... I was the product of a mutual "rebound marriage" that lasted barely long enough to conceive me. I am sorry to learn that you've been through so much even since then... *hugs* But very well-said.

  5. #5
    BabieJawny

    Default

    I can sooo relate...well...kinda.... My problem: I kinda am the favorite sibling, lmao; I have a big brother and a big sister. Both of them kinda hate me for being the favorite. I've built up a lot of guilt over the years because of it, and have tried to build relationships with them, but it never really worked out. They're both moved out of the house now with lives of their own; sister even has a few kids now. I'm still living in my childhood bedroom at my parent's house. They're getting old and need someone around to help them out so being the youngest, that job naturally fell to me, which of course only made me look even better, which grinds my other siblings gears. It still gets to me occasionally; I really wished that I had a brother and sister who cared about me, but frankly, I don't think they'd think too much of it if I just dropped dead so that they could compete for the new-favorite-sibling-position lol. But yep...I've been working on trying to overcome my feelings of guilt in this area and positively affirm to myself that I can't help it that I'm more likable than my brother and sister.

    I too often wonder if favoritism in the family was a contributing factor to my becoming an adult baby. My parents always coddled and babied me more than my other siblings; maybe if they'd been harder on me I wouldn't be the favorite, and ideally be standing on equal footing with my brother and sister.

  6. #6

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    As the “other” child out of only 2, I understand. It sucks having parents shower one with attention, love, and money, while you watch from the sidelines. What sucks worse is when they try and gaslight you into believing that nothing of the sort ever happened. My entire family expects me to play nice and pretend everything was always fine... I usually play along because the fights just aren’t worth it.

  7. #7

    Default

    I too, can relate to this. I am the middle child of three, and never really bonded with my mother. When I was very young, I was packed off to live with an
    aunt and uncle who were very loving and supportive. I spent the first few years with them, until I was returned to my mother.
    She was quite a cold person towards me, but loving towards my two brothers.
    Long story short, I grew up feeling isolated, and a bit of a loner. I found making friends quite a difficult process and was often on my own, looking
    on from the side lines.
    Throughout life, I have only ever had one or two great friends, who supported me, and I cherish those friendships.
    I still shy away from making friends, as the fall-out when the friendship is over, is much too hard to bear.
    The same is true about relationships, as I have just been dumped by my boyfriend of two years....
    Sometimes, I find it is better to be alone, because the pain of rejection is sometimes too hard to bear!

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