got my confidence back

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scbaby

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  1. Diaper Lover
  2. Incontinent
Today was way better than yesterday. I had my supplies with me, and the leakage was contained. And the best part, I don't think anyone noticed or if they did, they didn't care. Now per a recommendation from another member here, I stumbled upon Cuddlez shop. They sell all things related to the AB and DL community as well as the incontinent community.
This member recommend onsies to hide the diaper better (the bulk etc) and it won't slip up or out of the waist of my pants and reduces the risk of my incontinence protection showing. I'm either in briefs or diaper at this point.

But just knowing that there are many folks who have and share the same thing with me, just in different versions, and knowing where to buy products is really reassuring and that having my extra supplies and a brief on today made it a giant difference vs yesterday when I was a complete frazzled mess.
 
Glad to see you're getting things straightened out.
 
It's going to be a long road but yes things ate moving forward.
 
Glad to hear it. Building confidence takes time, but it's definitely worth it.
 
It's been nerve racking being in public places diapered.
I have a love/hate relationship with this right now as I was recently diagnosed IC. I love it because I now know what is going on and hate it because it has changed my life drastically.

However I'm taking all of this one day at a time.

The bonus is is don't have to constantly excuse myself from the table if something happens, it happens.

At work it is a different story. Since the restroom is often occupied by someone having the added benefit of a diaper makes my work day a tad easier, however there is the embarrassing part of why if I leak? What if someone notices? What if......

Fortunately enough in haven't had any major incidents at work. The reason I went to the doctor was the leaks were becoming more and more frequent, and I got tired of wondering if anyone noticed or could smell something.

But thanks to the encouragement of the fine people on this forum group my confidence is returning.
 
On the flip side, to add discreetness I have take the advice of another member here, I have ordered some onsies. I also did some research on them and they also help keep the diaper close to the body to reduce sag and bulk post incident. That'll be handy since the majority of the people I work with are younger than me, (I'm in my 30s and they are in their 20s early and mid).
 
Let's be honest ,people are too self absorbed most times to notice your in a diaper and even if they did what are they going to say " only babies wear diapers, take that off " not likely and if they did who cares , my medical problem has as an adaption , there ignorance doesnt,and i pity the fool who notices and provides a commentary on my diaper, I give respect and get respect anyone who doesn't care to conform to accepted norms are going to find I am more than a potent adversary as I will completely dress them down I guarantee the sucker will never make another peanut gallery peanut commentary as long ads they live, because I take no prisoners , I have not always been an incontinent cripp ,and am nothing less then fully educated experienced adult who will find a place for them and put them in it, i have seen the unspeakable horrors people commit and been at many a person's side as they departed this world , so they will find no comfort in what I have to say , the old saying of make love not war but be prepared for both applies to all areas of life including issue of continence , don't invite a problem but if it finds you , solve it , with or without diapers you are nothing less than unique and precious human being and anyone who can't see that is an enemy of us all ,there is a line and if someone crosses it ,be prepared to fully defend it ,making cracks about diapers or needing them in a vicious way is as offensive as going up to someone who had a heart transplant , and saying " I hear you were recently proven to be completely heart less", even if we don't feel our disabilities are disabling , I can not and will not accept another human being looking down there nose at another because of any condition beyond there control from alcoholism to transgender and everything in between .
Don't let your needing diapers make a difference in your life ( other than containing the liquids and solids) don't let them hold you down or hold you back , life is hard and short ,but how you live it brings meaning to it for you , honors the struggles of your forefathers and gives hope and promise to the future.

Sent from my SM-T810 using Tapatalk
 
Tetra
You are absolutely right. However I hadn't worn a diaper out in public before, so the race of questions was running rampant, can the see my diaper? Did they notice it? Is my shirt tucked in? Did I leak? Is there a wet spot on my shorts?

Once I overcame the initial fear all was easier for me. And once I relaxed things felt better and felt smoother.
 
scbaby,

Hang in there. You seem to be doing very well and are experiencing the same range of emotions and doubts that every incontinent does. We all have been there and we do understand. It does get better with time, but feel free to vent any frustrations and ask questions.

Congratulations on getting the onesie. I couldn't live without mine.

Another great device to support a sagging diaper is sports compression pants. They also help to smooth out any bulges.

And yet another very useful device is underwear suspenders, or so-called "diaper suspenders." They are great in hot weather when you do not want to wear the onesie.

--John
 
jdinvirginia said:
scbaby,

Hang in there. You seem to be doing very well and are experiencing the same range of emotions and doubts that every incontinent does. We all have been there and we do understand. It does get better with time, but feel free to vent any frustrations and ask questions.

Congratulations on getting the onesie. I couldn't live without mine.

Another great device to support a sagging diaper is sports compression pants. They also help to smooth out any bulges.

And yet another very useful device is underwear suspenders, or so-called "diaper suspenders." They are great in hot weather when you do not want to wear the onesie.

--John

Good advice on the compression pants and I have not heardof diaper suspenders I'll have to look into them.

The onsies i got (not here yet they are coming in from the UK) are light cotton, and I will be ordering more thicker materialed ones come fall and winter.

But wearing a diaper has gotten so much easier since Tuesday. It was very awkward at first and then got easier and by Friday it was cake. But that was at work. Actually being out in the actual eye of the public is going to bring back all the anxiety. I have worn out in public once thus far it was semi easy, but today I actually have to go grocery shopping and to the pharmacy. So I hope it's easier than I anticipate.
 
scbaby said:
.

But wearing a diaper has gotten so much easier since Tuesday. It was very awkward at first and then got easier and by Friday it was cake. But that was at work. Actually being out in the actual eye of the public is going to bring back all the anxiety. I have worn out in public once thus far it was semi easy, but today I actually have to go grocery shopping and to the pharmacy. So I hope it's easier than I anticipate.

The anticipation is so much worse than reality.

Here's the thing: Do you know the expression "Fake it 'til you make it"? Just go out into the world and fake all the confidence you'd have under normal circumstances. Be calm. Be yourself. Focus on what you're doing, not what you're wearing. Soon you will realize that, like everyone else, you're just shopping. Like everyone else, you aren't aware of what anyone else in the store looks like. And you won't be faking any more because you'll know that they are not aware of what you​ look like either.
 
Sounds advice. Yes I do know the "fake it, till you make it" I work with former addicts and that's a common saying.

And I went out today and no one was really even paying a bit of attention to me (until my kids started acting like fools).

When I'm out and about in watch people (I used to work investigative security so watching people is just something I inadvertently do) and wonder if they are wearing a diaper, not that I really care but it's just a thing that pops into my head, I started to think is that guy over there doing Thai Chi IC? Or how about that rebellious looking teenager, what about him/her.

Then I realized it was my own insecurities playing me. Then I stopped, loaded the kids into the car and drive home.

I just informed my mom about my condition and naturally she is worried but I reassured her I'm seeing a doctor about this and I will get through this.

But still no one noticed and if they did notice they didn't say anything, not that they would have in the first place.
 
It can be hard sometimes, some days worse than others. Once I got used to it it came to a point where I don't worry about it at all until I do have an accident. And as I said since days are particularly bad, especially with the bowel accidents mixed with a bladder accidents it's hard to keep your composure in public.... But eventually I believe it becomes manageable. It must.
 
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