Just came back from a purge of all things abdl

I haven't worn diapers or done any little things in a long while, I haven't been feeling it. I kind of realized that this is a part of me and I am slowly embracing it. Though I still feel strange from time to time about being little. This seems to happen a lot to me, but I consistently come back to the diapers and the community around them. Is this unusual? I don't always know how to feel.

Do any of you guys go on anti diaper purges? It is difficult at times to allow this to be a part of me that I'm not somewhat bashful of. but I try to embrace that I love diapers and after a few months of regular underwear i had to cave in and buy some diapers. I just bought some diapers from ABU because there had been a drought for so long :'). How can something so good feel so wrong?

-Chocotacosaur

1 of the dumbest things to do on a diaper purge is to throw stuff out, did it too much in the past.

Yes I have had a break for a time and even thrown out all my stuff..but I just let it pass anymore.. in the end I realize how wonderful I am allowing myself to Feel and Nothing compares to this security that I can find nowhere else..Only talking to other ABDL's comes close..this World can be a Harsh place..I think we All need each other..

No more purges for me. I'm getting too old to care what others think about a part of me that is harmless and unchangeable. Thanks to this site, I no longer feel shame or guilt for my natural feelings. I wear every day now. It's my life. It's my lifestyle and my identity. For years I tried to shove it away, suppress it, fear it, even. Terrified that the normal outside world would rip me apart if they found out. Scared that I would creep people out and drive them away. I felt like an abomination because I had these weird feelings.

Purges did nothing but ruin my self esteem, self image, and confidence. I feel terrible guilt and am a horrid self harmer. I've developed Borderline Personality Disorder I think, in part, because of the shame and fear I felt over this secret that I hid from the entire world. When you have a vital part of you that has to remain hidden from the world, it does something to your head.

So seeing as this ABDL thing causes no harm to me and makes me feel natural and feel like the real me, I'd say the purge days are over. If those weirdo feelings creep back up, I diaper up and drive them away. Bye, bye, demons. Go bother someone else.

I've tried to break away but carn't last, I just get more anxious, stressed and don't know what to do with myself. So have always come back.

Maxx said:

I did a partial purge when it looked nearly certain that a half-crazy adult relative was going to live with us.

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Maxx, does this mean the relative was a Democrat?

I resonated with your comment so much. I liked how you said it doesn't define me as a person. That statement alone made me feel so much more reassured that I have nothing to feel shame for. Thank you, and to everyone who replied with their personal experience and advice. This is a great community.

I went through multiple binge purge cycles before I started to embrace myself. It feels much better when you start to embrace. It's also cheaper because you don't have to rebuy things.
I've found only way out is through. As a bonus, it's enjoyable

Maxx said:

, or more recently I did a partial purge when it looked nearly certain that a half-crazy adult relative was going to live with us. Junked the older more worn out stuff so I only had a compact stash that could be re-hidden, moved, or dumped on short notice.

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Jeez, do you have one of those. My wife's brother is mine and he lived with us for half a year, and yeah, there were no diapers for me.

I think having purges occurs more often when we're younger. I had a very difficult time accepting this when I was young. I grew up relatively poor, living on the Jersey Shore, a place you had to be tough. I played sports and lifted weights, and feeling and acting like a baby didn't fit in with who I thought I was supposed to be.

Over the many years I realized I'm a much different person, and one who doesn't have to please others as to what they may want me to be or perceive me to be. Now I can thoroughly enjoy being "little", wearing diapers and using them for their intended purposes. I certainly don't advertise it to anyone other than my wife, but it doesn't make me ashamed or self confused. It simply is a part of who I am.

been there done that way to many time. it took a long time to get use to my baby side, and now I'm ok with who and what I'm.

so when you go though the purge aging just put your thing in a box until you need them again. :grouphug:

I've been an ABDL for my whole life, and once I started acting on it, the urge to purge was near immediate. To me it's like a shadow, if there is a sun, there is a shadow. Since I currently buy store bought diapers (hoping to change that soon) my purging wasn't insanely expensive, but it was still wasteful. My girlfriend used to hold my stuff so I couldnt purge because the purging cycles happened so often. I never stopped purging, but My best advice is just to ignore it when it comes up and focus on something else.