miapeters
Est. Contributor
- Messages
- 329
- Role
- Incontinent
Hey everyone,
So I've been going through my own stuff and I'm always dealing with another problem or just wanting to "get out there more" .
As far as I can remember I have never progressed in a relationship much. The closest I've got to a person physically was this one guy which didn't really end well. I think he was some sort of DL? I don't know, it was very subtle but I was very insecure about myself at the to and to this day I don't think anything has changed. When ever I think of getting into a relationship I always I always think of the physical side and I become so insecure about the incontinence and just tune out. I honestly think that is possible that I'll be a virgin for the rest of my life.
Even in college I've been so unresponsive to people's interest in taking to me or just getting to know me and I'm just dead scared of just conversing. I feel like I have no skills to socialize anymore and I'm finding it harder and harder to make any friends. Even though I know this I can't even try to do it because I always choke at the last moment and nothing happens.
I don't know what I can do myself to get out of this but I just can't talk to people anymore. I want to avoid them even though I know it's not good for me. I know there's something wrong and I don't know if just talking about it or any of this therapy is working. The only close relationship I have is with my mother and even that isn't going to last when I transfer next semester. I'm just lost in everything. I don't even know what to do, where to go, but just move forward with whatever is going on.
I use prosthetic's to get around and I think one part of me doesn't like the attention so much that I just naturally ignore people. Whenever someone uses the "disabled' term I always think why is it like this.
I'm not depressed, this is different. But in the back of my mind I'm afraid that this might lead to me getting depressed again.
So I've been going through my own stuff and I'm always dealing with another problem or just wanting to "get out there more" .
As far as I can remember I have never progressed in a relationship much. The closest I've got to a person physically was this one guy which didn't really end well. I think he was some sort of DL? I don't know, it was very subtle but I was very insecure about myself at the to and to this day I don't think anything has changed. When ever I think of getting into a relationship I always I always think of the physical side and I become so insecure about the incontinence and just tune out. I honestly think that is possible that I'll be a virgin for the rest of my life.
Even in college I've been so unresponsive to people's interest in taking to me or just getting to know me and I'm just dead scared of just conversing. I feel like I have no skills to socialize anymore and I'm finding it harder and harder to make any friends. Even though I know this I can't even try to do it because I always choke at the last moment and nothing happens.
I don't know what I can do myself to get out of this but I just can't talk to people anymore. I want to avoid them even though I know it's not good for me. I know there's something wrong and I don't know if just talking about it or any of this therapy is working. The only close relationship I have is with my mother and even that isn't going to last when I transfer next semester. I'm just lost in everything. I don't even know what to do, where to go, but just move forward with whatever is going on.
I use prosthetic's to get around and I think one part of me doesn't like the attention so much that I just naturally ignore people. Whenever someone uses the "disabled' term I always think why is it like this.
I'm not depressed, this is different. But in the back of my mind I'm afraid that this might lead to me getting depressed again.