DracoAmericanus said:
peer pressure will have an effect but in my case I did not care and I turned out fairly well, kids should be left to grow out of it at there own pace, but past a certain age I would teach the kid change them self to teach them that it has it's down sides.
"I don't think it's a good idea developmentally to allow a child to continue wearing past potty training age" I strongly disagree with that, wearing a diaper does not stunt your development, provided that moderation is in use
But I do like your idea of using them as a reward, I wish my parents did that, I might have avoided a few incidents where police where involved, lol
Okay, I think we need to clarify context here. I'm coming from my own personal experience of discovering diapers for pleasure at a later age in middle childhood well beyond my potty training. It sounds like you're coming from a background of being forced out of diapers too early and trying to get yourself back into them through childhood. Am I on the right track? If we're going to continue this conversation I need to make sure we're talking about the same circumstances, otherwise we're going to be talking right past each other.
When I say it's developmentally not a good idea to allow a child to continue wearing past potty training age, I specifically mean allowing the child to wear CONSISTENTLY (i.e. 24/7) after they have been potty trained. If accidents or bedwetting episodes are a problem, I don't have an issue with using diapers on a child and I don't believe in shaming them for it because I consider that a medical necessity. If a child in my particular circumstances was allowed to use diapers for fun in moderation in the privacy of their own home (or at least underneath clothing every once in a while outdoors) then I'm not worried about it. I just grow concerned when people talk about allowing kids to STAY in diapers because I jump to worst case scenario. I think we're both in agreement though that moderation is the key phrase here, and kids do not inherently have moderation skills for things they passionately enjoy. That's why good parents and caretakers establish boundaries to teach children those moderating skills. Without that moderating boundary, yes, it absolutely negatively affects their development and personal independence if they know an adult is going to come change them whenever it is needed. However, you have already addressed having children perform changes on their own.
And the environmental impact is over blown, only the spun polyester shell and inner liner are non biodegradable, the fluff in diapers is mostly wood pulp and that does decay, and it's not like we are talking about a lot of kids, the percent is fairly low that want to wear at older ages, and since you mentioned the environmental impact think about our group, it's hypocritical coming from a group like ours. disposables or cloth have an impact on the environment. and the last figures I saw it came out as a draw, for cloth, washing them uses water, electrical power and cleaning chemicals a disposable in mass production uses less energy then cleaning a cloth one but the shell does not degrade, they can be burned to generate power, I know of one experiment where they gather up "spent diapers" from nursing homes and burn them in a power plant to generate power, the wood pulp for disposables and the cloth for cloth diapers are both renewable.
but this coming from a group where a lot of us wear for non medical needs, need not argue about the environmental impact of diapers
I'm not advocating perfection in environmental impact. There would be no such thing. But I also need to clarify that my usage is SIGNIFICANTLY different than most on this site. The reason my name so rarely pops up on this forum is because my binge purge cycles mean that I wear maybe a few times for 1-2 weeks every couple of months at most. I have packs of diapers from YEARS ago. So my carbon footprint is radically different than say a child who wants to wear for pleasure on a 24/7 basis (which I was initially under the impression that we were discussing).
That being said, the environmental concern should ALWAYS be up for discussion and consideration. Our consumer based economies don't often allow us to have zero waste products. Therefore, we always have the opportunity to make better choices to reduce our impact, even if we cannot eliminate our impact. And, in your examples provided, you have neglected to address the SAP gel in the absorbent core. Wood pulp is just a portion of the core, and that ratio is different depending on the diaper. Bambinos have HUGE SAP content. Coming back to the burned diaper shells, I have to wonder how effective the air filters are on those power generators, because burning large amounts of plastic backed diapers seems like a huge air waste hazard to me. Plus, you mentioned this by saying, "I know of one experiment..." Anecdote does not equal data. One experiment does not account for the rest of our country. So while that may be a convenient example, it doesn't address the reality of the situation.
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CookieMonstah said:
I'm only 20 and have never thought about, if and when I have kids, keeping them in diapers longer than they need to be. For one like the OP stated, it's expensive and it just wouldn't be fair on the child. I've always said I'd train my kids first and if they showed interest in wanting to wear then I'd allow it but talk to them about it and they'd have to buy the diapers themselves and change etc
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
This. My thoughts exactly.
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DracoAmericanus said:
Yeah I never said to not do it, I said not to force it at some magical age, there are loads of advantages not being tied to diaper all the time, I was forced out and had a need for them, I wet the bed and went though total hell.
I don't understand why people even care if the kid across the street wears a diaper longer. I have never understood that, my step sister would rather have her son piss the bed then have a diaper, it's a normal condition kids of his age have but god forbid using a diaper, The same applied to me as well, it's just firkin stupid
Well damn, dude, that's horrible that you had to experience that. No kid should have to experience that and you're right, forcing children out when they're not ready isn't okay. But ENCOURAGING them and getting them to consider that option to meet you halfway is precisely what I advocate for. When I hear about people 'allowing children to stay in diapers' I admittedly jump to the worst possible scenario and imagine someone not even trying to potty train. But I think we're speaking from different contexts here.
As for why people make a big deal, it's a basic matter of social status and perceived weakness. Is it fair? No. But life isn't fair and not everyone is nice. Rather than trying to change the world to fit my perfect image, I prefer to adapt myself to survive in the world. The kids I work with, I always teach them that they can control their immediate environments and choose their friends, but they sometimes can't choose the people they work with or interact with and therefore need to learn how to adapt to circumstances rather than expecting circumstances to adapt to them. As for your sister, I can't speak on her situation. Idk whether money is tight or if she feels like she might be a failure if her kid regresses to diapers again. It's hard to say. But unless you have a way to convince her (which may cause strain between you two) then I recommend you try to find some compromise. Like her son uses pull-ups when he's not at home, but at home they stick to vinyl sheets or something. Idk, that's between you and her. Or maybe it's not if it's her child and she's not willing to listen.
