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Thread: Help girlfriend know I wear at night.

  1. #1

    Post Help girlfriend know I wear at night.

    My girlfriend recently found out I wear diapers to bed.
    She was putting stuff in the garage and found one in there and she asked me if they were mine I said yes because I have a problem at night. That went well she accepts me and everything is okay. But she was doing some research on the Internet about my bedwetting issue. Found out about adult babies and diaper lovers. She isn't very fond of that and asked if I was into that stuff because if I was she would leave me. I wanna wear during the day as well as at night what can I do I don't wanna leave her or her to leave me. She is gonna be a nurse so she is very open minded I can tell her anything. As to telling her I'm a little or like wearing diapers in general. All the help I can get is much appreciated. Thanks everyone.

  2. #2


    Honesty always the best policy. If she can't accept you for who you are move on.

  3. #3


    Agreed with Incontal. Sadly, your girlfriend has already told you how she feels about your predilections, and you can't change who you are. You can hide it for a while, you can lie to yourself for a while, but you will be who you will be. It would have been best if she'd known you more completely before this, but the truth was eventually going to come out.

    Now, I will say that right now, all your girlfriend knows about all this is what she's seen on the Internet, depicted in the creepiest possible way with strangers in diapers. She may change her mind when she's able to associate those things with someone she knows and loves, but you may have some serious work to do in the trust department. She will likely feel misled at least and betrayed at worst. But starting right now, today, honesty is your ONLY path forward.


  4. #4


    I really wish I would have told my wife before marriage. I finally did it after being married 11 years and it went very badly. She actuallyvalmost took the kids and left me. And in my situation, I am only DL. No AB whatsoever. I wish I would have told her back when we were getting engaged so she could have had the chance to run if she wanted to. It wasn't fair to her for me to hold onto this secret for so long. And also, if she would have ran (which I know she would have since she told me she would have), it would have hurt me, but it also would have given me the opportunity to find a wife that accepted it and maybe even participated. I was so ashamed of my DL side back then that I wouldn't have dreamed of telling anybody and I really thought I could stop after marriage.

    Long story short, be open and honest with her now before you end up like me. Married for 13 years and not 100% happy because you aren't allowed to be yourself. I'm not saying I don't love my wife, but it sucks when you have to live the rest of your life in hiding.

  5. #5


    Ditto. Although you are faced with two unpleasant possibilities, living a lie could easily be the worst.

  6. #6


    Personally I would end it, but I wouldn't do it with full disclosure. I would continue with the story about the nighttime incontinence and explain that the ABDL community has been very supportive and accepting of your issue in a world full of ignorance and blind judgement. In good conscience you can't continue on in a relationship with someone who is so closed minded.

  7. #7


    Quote Originally Posted by PaddedInPuyallup View Post
    ... it sucks when you have to live the rest of your life in hiding.
    Living in hiding is denying your true self and that is soul destroying tinyjess. Be what you are and not what others need and want you to be in order to confirm their worldview, or live a lie. That is your choice and it's not an easy one to make at any age.

    best wishes

  8. #8


    I told my wife many years after we were married and it turned out very well, but I'm one of the lucky ones. One thing I do know is that if your marriage lasts your entire lives, so does not wearing diapers when you want. Can you live with that?

  9. #9


    Doh, letting someone do their own research about ABDLs is always a bad idea. Worse yet, letting them come to their own misconclusions.

    You need to focus on damage control. Sit down with her and actually explain what abdl really is about. Let her know how important diapers are to you, and how they go way beyond the misconceptions everyone seems them to be.

    However, also plan for and expect the worst. It is possible the two of you are just not compatible. Trying to spend too much time into making your relationship stable could actually be a waste of time. Hope it works for you though.

  10. #10


    If she can't excpet that you are a diaper lover its not going to work, be honest, hiding it is not going to end well especially when she finds out.

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