What Do Would You Tell Your Kids?

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  1. Diaper Lover
Let me just start off by saying how therapeutic this group has been. I no longer have a Facebook or any social media accounts because I just got so tired of people trying to live and show their "highlight reel" of i life that is very different from what they are currently experiencing. I feel I can be authentic and genuine in here and deal with REAL problems...but I digress.

I am a married man with four kids and I wasn't until the day after this past Easter that my wife finally "got it" that diapers are a part of whom I am and are a way of life vice simply choosing this lifestyle. It was as if 5 years of deep depression seemed to largely go away overnight as if it had never happened. Up until this point when I would buy diapers in stores I would always have an excuse as to why I was buying in the even that i knew someone that saw me buying them but now that I have been given the green light to purchase them, my wife's biggest fear/concern and I suppose mine is well, is that one of our kids will find them and ask "what are those?" or "why is daddy wearing a diaper?" I will say that I don't take chances and I am very cautious but on the off chance that I were to be discovered, I'm still not entirely sure what my response would be. If you have kids and are in a similar situation, what would you say or if this actually happened to you, what DID you say?
 
I don't have kids of my own but I would just tell them what they are. And why you wear them that you have depression and that they help you stay happy

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I have had to travel with my step sister and her kids and there was no way I could hide this so I told them I need them for medical reasons and explained that can some times happen for adults and left it at that, sure the kids thought it was kinda funny at first that there uncle wears diapers but that was short lived, they did not understand at first until I said it was a medical difficulty but was soon forgotten about, I kept them out of sight in my back pack and acted like it was nothing.
My Grandmother and Grandfather needed them at what would be seen as a young age back in the 1990's and at a young age I knew about it and knew it was something they needed for an active life.
The attitude that you express is in my view critical, have self confidance in your self, act like it's just a medical hiccup and leave it at that.

I don't know if I would tell them about depression but just need them for medical reasons, Don't need to make it more complicated. I would keep it short and simple and medical needs covers depression anyway so you are still being truthful to your kids, I don't know the maturity level of your children so that's why I would keep it simple
 
I've been struggling with the same issue. My wife really doesn't think it's a big deal but then again, she's not the one with a lifelong secret! She knows about my ABDL side and we have two kids, with the younger being almost 8. I'm preparing for that day when they notice something. I'll probably tell them it's a personal, private issue for me and leave it at that. But I also have mental issues so I'm afraid I might panic and over react. I have been trying to raise them as tolerant, open-minded individuals so that if they ever did find out, they would be more ready to accept their weird dad. I tell them to be themselves, as long as it doesn't hurt them or others. Be who you are and own every bit of it, good and bad.
 
DracoAmericanus said:
I have had to travel with my step sister and her kids and there was no way I could hide this so I told them I need them for medical reasons and explained that can some times happen for adults and left it at that, sure the kids thought it was kinda funny at first that there uncle wears diapers but that was short lived, they did not understand at first until I said it was a medical difficulty but was soon forgotten about, I kept them out of sight in my back pack and acted like it was nothing.
My Grandmother and Grandfather needed them at what would be seen as a young age back in the 1990's and at a young age I knew about it and knew it was something they needed for an active life.
The attitude that you express is in my view critical, have self confidance in your self, act like it's just a medical hiccup and leave it at that.

I don't know if I would tell them about depression but just need them for medical reasons, Don't need to make it more complicated. I would keep it short and simple and medical needs covers depression anyway so you are still being truthful to your kids, I don't know the maturity level of your children so that's why I would keep it simple

Honestly, telling them they are needed for medical reasons wouldn't even be a lie at this point. My depression was bad enough for 30 days at an in patient treatment center and when I wear diapers, although a partime is sexual, it's more soothing than anything else and pulls me out of my funk.

- - - Updated - - -

Tommycombs said:
I've been struggling with the same issue. My wife really doesn't think it's a big deal but then again, she's not the one with a lifelong secret! She knows about my ABDL side and we have two kids, with the younger being almost 8. I'm preparing for that day when they notice something. I'll probably tell them it's a personal, private issue for me and leave it at that. But I also have mental issues so I'm afraid I might panic and over react. I have been trying to raise them as tolerant, open-minded individuals so that if they ever did find out, they would be more ready to accept their weird dad. I tell them to be themselves, as long as it doesn't hurt them or others. Be who you are and own every bit of it, good and bad.

My kids are 6, 4, 2, and 0 and it's like I have inquisitive raccoons that get into everything. In this situation I know less is more and probably leave it that I needed them for medical reasons. Being 100% accepting of myself was one of the hardest things I've ever done but it is necessary for total tranquility with yourself. Do I want this? No, but it's who I am. I was raped and molested multiple times by my uncle when I was 5 and that profoundly messed me up with depression so you're not alone.
 
I think Tommycombs advice is almost spot on:

"I have been trying to raise them as tolerant, open-minded individuals so that if they ever did find out, they would be more ready to accept their weird dad. I tell them to be themselves, as long as it doesn't hurt them or others. Be who you are and own every bit of it, good and bad."

Tommycombs, you are not wierd you are just not 'conventional' ;-). None of us are conventional but acceptance has to start with ourselves. Until we accept who we are and are comfortable with who we are we should be very careful about opening up. I read a great book by a guy called Brian Burch. I would recommend reading it.

As for me, I don't consider my ABDLism a fetish - for me it's not sexual but rather a state of being and part of whom I am. As such and, unlike a fetish, I don't believe it belongs in the bedroom behind closed doors not to be discussed.

Theroadlesstraveled, like you I have 4 children. I have discussed with my wife being open and discussing it when the time is right. She isn't keen but we are on our own journey. I think I would find it harder to be open with my children without my wife's support (after all she may be the one who has to pick up the pieces). However that is not to say that I would never discuss it if ultimately she is not able to go from a state of tolerance to understanding and acceptance.

Kind regards T3ddy
 
I am so sorry to hear about that, my mom's second husband was abusive physical and verbally but I can't even fathom the other, every time I refer to my stepdad that's my mom's 3rd husband, my tormenter's name was jerry and never earned the term dad, he died a few years ago now and I have to say I felt relief more then anything, in that my slayer/tormenter was dead, it's the only time in my life I have every felt that feeling to some one that was in my life for nearly 15 years, he was the guy that took my most loved rabbit plush that took nearly 15 years to get back, he hid it, my mom found it and gave it back at towards the end of that hell. but for what you went though I am at a loss for words, no one should ever go though that.

I too have battled with depression for a very long time, I am on disability because of it's severity, diapers are one way I deal with it and I have a pet bearded dragon as well and even though she can't talk she emotes with her eyes and body language.
There are many times I wish I could have a family of my own my severity with autism prevents that from even happening, a Nuclear Reactor is easer for me to understand then human nature but you have a special gift, kids and a family that loves you so I think you wont have a problem telling your children about needing diapers, now I could see your two year old saying why do I have to potty train, dad gets to wear them! lol just to add a little humor to the situation
 
T3ddy said:
I think Tommycombs advice is almost spot on:

"I have been trying to raise them as tolerant, open-minded individuals so that if they ever did find out, they would be more ready to accept their weird dad. I tell them to be themselves, as long as it doesn't hurt them or others. Be who you are and own every bit of it, good and bad."

Tommycombs, you are not wierd you are just not 'conventional' ;-). None of us are conventional but acceptance has to start with ourselves. Until we accept who we are and are comfortable with who we are we should be very careful about opening up. I read a great book by a guy called Brian Burch. I would recommend reading it.

As for me, I don't consider my ABDLism a fetish - for me it's not sexual but rather a state of being and part of whom I am. As such and, unlike a fetish, I don't believe it belongs in the bedroom behind closed doors not to be discussed.

Theroadlesstraveled, like you I have 4 children. I have discussed with my wife being open and discussing it when the time is right. She isn't keen but we are on our own journey. I think I would find it harder to be open with my children without my wife's support (after all she may be the one who has to pick up the pieces). However that is not to say that I would never discuss it if ultimately she is not able to go from a state of tolerance to understanding and acceptance.

Kind regards T3ddy
Wow, you read my mind. I've been saying this forever! It's not a mere fetish. A mere sex thrill thing. I admit, they do turn me on and I do get relief in that way but it feels completely different. I have my adult side with those needs, but they are different needs. I've been trying to tell people without giving them details, that there is a big part of me with certain feelings. Far exceeding any simple kink. I literally feel like it's a good 1/3 of my identity. It's like a program on your computer that uses a lot of RAM but it's running in the background most of the time. It's always there and that's just the way it is. My brain is wired this way. You can't change me, but if you want to change me, you can! Ha, ha.

I'm challenging my insecurities and fears about my ABDL side and it's improving my over all mental health by giving me some much needed confidence.
 
Our community tends to polarize their arguments according to where on the spectrum they stand. For some it is purely sexual (and nothing wrong with that at all). That is a fetish. For some it is not sexual at all (again, nothing wrong with that). For many it's somewhere in the middle. It's how we are wired. I don't believe we can control that.

I get dismayed when members of our community (whatever that means) are intolerant to other members and/or towards members of the LGBT community because of their 'differences'. We are all unconventional in our own sweet way!

It's a bit like a transvestite picking a fight with a transgender person or vice versa because of what gives them the compulsion to wear clothes of the opposite sex. It doesn't help the standing of either community. We like to wear nappies - let's celebrate what is common between us rather than focusing on what distinguishes us.

Back to you Tommycombs, your attitude towards rearing your children as tolerant, open minded individuals is spot on and if you succeed in that you will have done them proud.

T3ddy
 
Theres no need to tell anyone anything unless they confront you about it. The beauty about diapers is you are not required to tell anyone about them or why you wear them (unless you go to one of those horrid European furry conventions where they ask you to register if you need diapers because they banned babyfurs wearing them)
 
If I had kids I'd rather not let them find out that I like to wear diapers. Especially at a young age kids tend to blab about anything and probably tell some random people, that their dad still wears diapers.

But for me diapers are more on a fetish side of things, so I feel like it belongs to the bedroom.
In the end you should do whatever you feel the most comfortable about. If they find out, it's probably the best bet to tell them it's for medical reasons and leave it at that.

rennecfox said:
Theres no need to tell anyone anything unless they confront you about it. The beauty about diapers is you are not required to tell anyone about them or why you wear them (unless you go to one of those horrid European furry conventions where they ask you to register if you need diapers because they banned babyfurs wearing them)

And sorry for being off topic here but I just have to ask, do they turn down all visitors who are wearing diapers or whats the deal there? I know some people who are in the Furry fandom and they always seemed like pretty open minded people to me.
 
We talk with our boys regularly about sex, consent, gender issues etc. When I was found out due to rustling, I explained about fetishes, and they totally understood. We are the creators of our own fears sometimes.
 
xtrabulk said:
We talk with our boys regularly about sex, consent, gender issues etc. When I was found out due to rustling, I explained about fetishes, and they totally understood. We are the creators of our own fears sometimes.

Wow, you get a sexual turn on by wearing around your own kids? That's a little too far and creepy for me.
 
Slomo said:
Wow, you get a sexual turn on by wearing around your own kids? That's a little too far and creepy for me.

I don't think that's what he meant, I think he was found out by wearing around his children and he had to explain himself.


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CookieMonstah said:
I don't think that's what he meant, I think he was found out by wearing around his children and he had to explain himself.


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Yeah it is. He said he has a fetish, and was wearing while playing with his kids. Sorry, but I'm a firm believer that fetishes, or anything that is purely sexual, needs to stay in your bedroom.

The fact he had one one, and was engaging in a fetish with his kids, is just plain wrong.
 
I think we should just let him explain himself, I'm not pointing fingers
 
T3ddy said:
Our community tends to polarize their arguments according to where on the spectrum they stand. For some it is purely sexual (and nothing wrong with that at all). That is a fetish. For some it is not sexual at all (again, nothing wrong with that). For many it's somewhere in the middle. It's how we are wired. I don't believe we can control that.

I get dismayed when members of our community (whatever that means) are intolerant to other members and/or towards members of the LGBT community because of their 'differences'. We are all unconventional in our own sweet way!

It's a bit like a transvestite picking a fight with a transgender person or vice versa because of what gives them the compulsion to wear clothes of the opposite sex. It doesn't help the standing of either community. We like to wear nappies - let's celebrate what is common between us rather than focusing on what distinguishes us.

Back to you Tommycombs, your attitude towards rearing your children as tolerant, open minded individuals is spot on and if you succeed in that you will have done them proud.

T3ddy

Very well said I'm with you 110%
 
xtrabulk said:
We talk with our boys regularly about sex, consent, gender issues etc. When I was found out due to rustling, I explained about fetishes, and they totally understood. We are the creators of our own fears sometimes.

Found it! Rado (if you see this), my appoligies once again. This is the poster I was referring to.

Xtrabulk, I seriously have to question you about this post! You infered when you were found out while ruslting with your kids that you then explained fetishes to your kids. Assuming you say this because diapers are a fetish for you, and knkwing all fetishes are sexual. Why then were you engaging in a sexual act while playing with your kids?!?

Seriously, that is a ban worthy posting right there! It's also enough to raise concerns to child protective services!!
 
Slomo said:
Found it! Rado (if you see this), my appoligies once again. This is the poster I was referring to.

Xtrabulk, I seriously have to question you about this post! You infered when you were found out while ruslting with your kids that you then explained fetishes to your kids. Assuming you say this because diapers are a fetish for you, and knkwing all fetishes are sexual. Why then were you engaging in a sexual act while playing with your kids?!?

Seriously, that is a ban worthy posting right there! It's also enough to raise concerns to child protective services!!

Um, Slomo, he said "rustling," not "wrestling." As in his diapers were making noise? So he was not "playing with (his) kids"; he was merely going about his business and they noticed the diaper crinkle. The fact that he has an open enough dynamic in his family to explain fetishes with his children is their business, not yours or mine; each family unit must make those kinds of decisions as is comfortable for itself. In my case, my children and I openly discussed sexual and gender identity a very early age (in the case of my youngest: three) because of my transition. We've never talked about kinky things beyond a discussion of lesbian porn with my oldest daughter when I found her watching it at 14. My then-20-yr-old youngest daughter found my paci once and asked about it ("is this connected to your diapers?"); I suppose I could have just told the truth, since she's aware already that I'm IC, but I maintained that it was because of a tooth-grinding habit at night. Don't know if she bought that or not; it's never come up again. Bottom line: I don't see anything in that post that necessarily means that xtrabulk is involving his children in sexual activity either overtly or clandestinely. You're really reading into this.
 
kerry said:
Um, Slomo, he said "rustling," not "wrestling." As in his diapers were making noise? So he was not "playing with (his) kids"; he was merely going about his business and they noticed the diaper crinkle. The fact that he has an open enough dynamic in his family to explain fetishes with his children is their business, not yours or mine; each family unit must make those kinds of decisions as is comfortable for itself. In my case, my children and I openly discussed sexual and gender identity a very early age (in the case of my youngest: three) because of my transition. We've never talked about kinky things beyond a discussion of lesbian porn with my oldest daughter when I found her watching it at 14. My then-20-yr-old youngest daughter found my paci once and asked about it ("is this connected to your diapers?"); I suppose I could have just told the truth, since she's aware already that I'm IC, but I maintained that it was because of a tooth-grinding habit at night. Don't know if she bought that or not; it's never come up again. Bottom line: I don't see anything in that post that necessarily means that xtrabulk is involving his children in sexual activity either overtly or clandestinely. You're really reading into this.

Possibly, that is why my first line was to say I needed to question him about it. That still doesn't expel him from the fact he was wearing for sexual purposes while around his kids.

Rustling a diaper enough to be found out by anyone pretty much means you are moving around a lot while in very close proximity to also be heard (especially if wearing under shorts or pants- as I am hopefully assuming correctly). You're right, I took that for playing with them (I never said wrestling), but it does leave room for interpertation otherwise.

It still begs the question of why he was even out of the bedroom with a diaper on under the condition of it being a fetish though.
 
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