Is it anymore of betrayal than your family not knowing you like diapers? What does it matter who they were pre transition, you did not know them , you fell in love with who they are now (didn't they do a movie like this year's ago I think it was called "the crying game") yes on a basic level of respect and fairness we should fully disclose ourselves to our families and loved ones , but if you feel like you don't have a skeletons in your closet , I would say your the first person ever ( and you better be able to prove your not guilty of anything in your life )
Rape is a serious crime of power and violence, how in God's green earth do you arrive at rape , I would think that someone who would freak and equate it with rape may want to withdraw from dating become celibate and lock themselves in the bell tower, how many people fail to talk about there HIV status or any potential STD before sex ? What does giving or receiving something like herpes our hepatitis equate to , must be high treason with special circumstances.
Communication is an essential skill that everyone should practice , do some people suck at it yes , do some people withold a part of themselves in relationships ,no doubt yes . I saw a comedian once do a whole act on the ream of forms questions and disclosures required to be a consenting adult for sex , the sad thing was that they made a 2 hour comedy act out of something so basic , that society has turned into a gauntlet .
And if this happened to you aren't you just as guilty of failing to ask" were you born a different gender than you appear now " because it sounds like a major issue in your life that you might want to see a therapist about .
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I have a friend who's transgender. I'm glad I'm his friend. You have to really talk with them yo understand them better
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