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Thread: Wearing out of the house

  1. #1

    Default Wearing out of the house

    Ok so I know I had a thread that talked about more of the limitations about how people felt about wearing a diaper out in public. Most agree that keeping in covered and not worring about the crinkle is average thinking. If it accidently shows an apology or answer for it isnt a big deal either. I want to talk more about someone a DD/LG relation that has made it public. Yes it's not the thing you would see out and about any day. This situation has a mommy or big sis taking care of a little girl. Someone playing 3 to 6 years old. You can see that the little is wearing a diaper under a skirt and clothes. They are not being obscene or disruptive in any manner. Lets say they are at a mall and the little is a boy who has with makeup you wouldn't tell is a boy. The little really has nothing to fear about someone finding out his real idenity unless his diaper gets changed, even then he still doesn't look like himself from makeup. The big sis isnt really known in the area. But has friends. Do you feel that it is just not ok, even though no laws or annoyances are being broken/created by the two? They are willing to explain the relationship to another who has come up and asked about them in an informative manner. Do you think this is not ok because it not widely accepted by the public? To me, the situation is an act, a freedom of speech, not harmful in any sexual or physical manner. I know that some feel that you are unwillingly bringing the public into the picture by doing this. What about thinking as the public as part of the environment that can't be controlled? I'm trying to stand on the fence about the situation described as i wrote this, but the questions asked are what I would like some answers to. Oh and if you feel like it, how much would you want shown off in public if you knew in a society people were ok with that and it non obtrusive manner. Do you feel that society today is too labeling for such actions? I would guess about 5% people asking about it openly and i have no idea about how a "hater" would be seen as by the rest of the public. Would the hater who sees them and makes fun, would he be considered a bully at large, or just rude because he isn't open minded to others?How open minded do you think the public is to such different ways of thinking, acting, treating others?

  2. #2
    mikejames

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    you don't owe anyone an apology if your diaper accidentally shows. I'm incontinent and HAVE to wear 24/7. I go to the gym every day after work and take a shower after my run. I put a new diaper on in the locker room. While I'm not an exhibitionist, I'm refusing to live if shame. A diaper is my underwear and people will see me at the gym putting it on. I'm not about to apologize to everyone in the locker room every day, and I'm certainly not going to "answer for it" to anyone either.

    The think is, be respectful. There's a big difference between needing diaper and people accidentally seeing them and getting your kicks by subjecting other people to your fetish. If your shirt rides up or something and your diaper is exposed, most people won't even notice and the ones who do notice will likely just assume you have a medical reason for it. No one gives a shit.

    If the little in you scenario is dressed like a baby and obviously diapered and being "parented" by someone who's obviously not their parent, I'd say your venturing into exhibitionism. If the little is just That said, people have the freedom to wear what they want. It only becomes offensive if/when you're purposely trying to get noticed for it. That is when it crosses a line and becomes offensive/obscene/rude etc. I think in your scenario it really depends on how this "little" is dressed. If it's a dude in makeup and pink hello kitty clothes and an obvious diaper, no one will mistake that person for incontinent and probably just think they're a freak. Certainly not breaking any laws and it's freedom of expression but it's getting pretty close to the line of making other people uncomfortable.

  3. #3

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    the public is not open-minded. you would have to keep it low-key and non-obvious. people dress differently for drag night at a gay club than they do when they try to pass for female in public. people dress differently for going into their bank office than they do when they only plan to pick up some takeaway/drive-through food. people dress differently when they have actual medical needs than when they are showing of or pretending.

    and people dress differently on halloween - that's when it's the least surprising to see what we'd consider an ageplay scene in public. any other time you'll either be intentionally disregarded, or thrown out by the management for disturbing "the public", which really means "customers they'd rather have than you".

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by EmeraldRegice View Post
    Ok...I know that some feel that you are unwillingly bringing the public into the picture by doing this. What about thinking as the public as part of the environment that can't be controlled? ...How open minded do you think the public is to such different ways of thinking, acting, treating others?
    This is an interesting scenario you describe and something I have some experience with. You hit the nail on the head by asking if this is unwillingly bringing the public into your role-play. The short answer to that is yes it is. You see as much as what you see this as freedom of expression, it can also be seen as engaging with others who have not consented to your game. Sexual or not, age-play is a huge taboo and a massive red flag for some people. Rightly or wrongly many in the public would deem your scenario as simply wrong. I don't judge, I don't say do not do it, but the general public may feel abused because you have not asked for their permission to act out fantasies or role-play in front of them

    They could simply turn away and ignore it, they could ask you for further information to make sure nothing strange is occurring. For the most part though you would probably just annoy a whole host of folk who were neither deserving or wanted to witness what was happening. I do not feel this comes down to labels or respect or anything of that nature. This comes down to forcing people to endure what boils down to a fetish without them consenting. You can still have the little/big dynamic out in public but you would need to tone it down and make sure if there was any chance you could offend anyone by your actions just give it a second thought before continuing.

    When I am out with my little in public, she still respects me and considers me her mother. However, we do not indulge in any babyish/sissy/sub/fetish aspects. We simply keep the dynamic alive for ourselves and nobody is none the wiser what is going on. The most we would go is the odd joke between ourselves or them being obedient to me in a very incognito manner.

  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by MotherFaith View Post
    This is an interesting scenario you describe and something I have some experience with. You hit the nail on the head by asking if this is unwillingly bringing the public into your role-play. The short answer to that is yes it is. You see as much as what you see this as freedom of expression, it can also be seen as engaging with others who have not consented to your game. Sexual or not, age-play is a huge taboo and a massive red flag for some people. Rightly or wrongly many in the public would deem your scenario as simply wrong. I don't judge, I don't say do not do it, but the general public may feel abused because you have not asked for their permission to act out fantasies or role-play in front of them

    They could simply turn away and ignore it, they could ask you for further information to make sure nothing strange is occurring. For the most part though you would probably just annoy a whole host of folk who were neither deserving or wanted to witness what was happening. I do not feel this comes down to labels or respect or anything of that nature. This comes down to forcing people to endure what boils down to a fetish without them consenting. You can still have the little/big dynamic out in public but you would need to tone it down and make sure if there was any chance you could offend anyone by your actions just give it a second thought before continuing.

    When I am out with my little in public, she still respects me and considers me her mother. However, we do not indulge in any babyish/sissy/sub/fetish aspects. We simply keep the dynamic alive for ourselves and nobody is none the wiser what is going on. The most we would go is the odd joke between ourselves or them being obedient to me in a very incognito manner.
    I'm curious about this, mostly as an academic question. My personal inclination is toward discretion, although I'm willing to get a bit more obvious the more people are involved. My take is that one person is weird (not necessarily good nor bad, just weird) but multiple people are forming culture. I wonder why we put our weird behavior into this special category when there are so many other public displays that while not well-accepted, just allow people to roll their eyes and move along (I do this a lot with my fellow humans).

    To me, just going about my adult business dressed like a toddler isn't imposing this on anyone. If I ask by my behavior or explicitly to engage with me as a toddler, I do feel as though I'm putting an onus on them, which seems overly forward and I would say rude. I'm a little fuzzier on whether it matters if the engagement in public is only with a caregiver or others who are in on it. People aren't required to interact if I don't seek them out but I'm willing to entertain that it might be a meaningful transgression. If I were to present in that limbo realm where it might be adult or childish behavior, is there any harm done?

    I know what the standard line is from the kink community but it seems like it's highly variable and even a bit puritanical. I haven't yet seen a compelling argument as to why our weird behavior is any worse than anyone else's for sexual or non-sexual reasons. I'm willing to accept a social contract of not having sex on the sidewalk (lewd and lascivious behavior for one) but wearing odd clothes and maybe some funky behavior that is focused on people who enjoy it doesn't really seem like a big deal to me.

  6. #6

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    Think of the children!

    No, seriously. I mean, think of the rest of us littles who's already undeservedly shady reputation would be further tarnished by unwanted public displays of ageplay!

    I think the distinction is that it's not just an odd dress and behavior (like shaving your head, wearing robes and handing out flowers), it's specifically associated with sexual fetish and activities (whether that's true for you or not). I mean nobody's surprised that parading in full BDSM gear would be considered inappropriate even if all the skin was covered and the wearer just liked to wear it for the comfort ... it's part of a specifically sexual scene that is not OK in public.

    Also, I think diapers are underwear and best efforts should be taken to keep them hidden in public...

    In any case my wife and I follow pretty closely to MotherFaith's description. If the mood strikes, we'll be playful and explicitly joking about it in a way that only has real meaning for us.

  7. #7

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    Instead of thinking of other fetishes, though that's a very good thought, I thought about how other people who may just show other sides of their personality or belief system, but how they, in my opinion, also role play. I've seen people in restaurants wear revealing clothing to show off hundreds of tattoos. I've seen people dress in goth or teen vampire clothes, out in public. And the craziest are the macho men who show up en mass with their pick up trucks and semi-automatic weapons in full view, as they descend on a Walmart. There was a recent article in our newspaper about two men who showed up at a police station, carrying a number of semi-automatic weapons in plain view, to pay a fine or something. The police freaked out and demanded they drop their weapons, and these two crazies gave argument.

    So there are plenty of people who take their personal fixations into the public. They may get a few odd looks, or in the case of armed macho men, people running for their lives. I think I'd rather see an adult baby coming toward me than an angry bearded macho man walking toward me with his really big, big, gun.

  8. #8

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    I wear out of the house all of the time, I wear not always worying if theres a bit of my diaper exposed, I don't pull down my pants however and point at my diapered butt and say "Look at me I'm wearing a diaper!" because I realize theres a difference between not caring and being an exhibitionist.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by AdorableRabbit View Post
    Think of the children!

    No, seriously. I mean, think of the rest of us littles who's already undeservedly shady reputation would be further tarnished by unwanted public displays of ageplay!

    I think the distinction is that it's not just an odd dress and behavior (like shaving your head, wearing robes and handing out flowers), it's specifically associated with sexual fetish and activities (whether that's true for you or not). I mean nobody's surprised that parading in full BDSM gear would be considered inappropriate even if all the skin was covered and the wearer just liked to wear it for the comfort ... it's part of a specifically sexual scene that is not OK in public.

    Also, I think diapers are underwear and best efforts should be taken to keep them hidden in public...

    In any case my wife and I follow pretty closely to MotherFaith's description. If the mood strikes, we'll be playful and explicitly joking about it in a way that only has real meaning for us.
    I think if you're tying your self-image to the behavior of other littles and ABDLs, you're bound for a lot of disappointment. Whether ultimately right or wrong, there are those in our community who enjoy playing in public. We can say we don't behave like that but we can't say they aren't ABDLs or littles.

    I still have a hard time seeing this as so uniquely wrong. Fetish gear in varying degrees is acceptable in public. Latex is kink and fashion simultaneously. If my kink was Levi's, should I never be allowed to wear them in public? It's certainly weird but I think we're essentially infantilizing the public to think that they can't look at a weirdo and not be scarred for life.

    It's a sexual kink for me. I'm not much of an exhibitionist as far as I can tell. My reasons for what little obvious public wearing I do is fun with friends and because it feels good to acknowledge that part of myself in the outer world. It's not something I get off on. I have not, to my knowledge been observed by anyone who wasn't into it or hadn't knowingly entered a kinky space. I'm at some pains to be discreet but I would say that's more because it is my nature to be discreet rather than because I believe it is required that I do so.
    Last edited by Trevor; 09-Feb-2017 at 17:33. Reason: Fixed an autocorrect typo

  10. #10

    Default

    I look at this from two different angles. First, I think it should be allowed. 100% allowed and nobody can stop you if you want to do it. Wearing little clothes and acting little in public places is a form of free expression from a legal perspective. It's not different, as far as the law is concerned, from standing on a sidewalk and talking to other people about your political opinions. People are allowed to do that as long as they're non-violent. So, regardless of my personal opinions about being little in public, I'll defend someone's right to do it with all my being.

    Second, my own attitude is somewhat more conservative than what I think is legal. I'd rather not engage in that sort of public play myself (though I do like wearing diapers out under normal clothes), and I'd feel quite bad if I were causing distress to people around me with my unusual behavior. I've had to do the political flyer thing too, and I felt terribly awkward and embarrassed about having to go up and approach strangers doing that. I did it in the flyer case because I felt it was for a good cause, but I don't see my individual pleasure as anywhere near as good a cause so I wouldn't do it.

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