Wll an odd aspect of me.

How do you deal with excitement when cross dressing?

I don't think I've discussed this, but it's rather odd for me since I'm a trans girl <3

Well, I wouldn't really call it cross dressing for me (mostly the trans thing) but this is a odd part of me being transgender, is it's also "exciting for me" and it's not something I can control.

It's actually quite annoying, at times like this, it really confirms who I am, seems to be rooted in my own personality, which is odd, just like diapers it's both sexual and a part of me, meaning I don't just do it for sexual reasons, in fact don't really care about it being sexual, it just is, and is a rather annoyance.

The idea of me being physically female is rather exciting for me, I have no clue why this is, It's not "just sexual" it seems to stem really into my personality, I am quite feminine which I do try to mask as I'm ashamed personally.

I really want to wear cute dresses, wear lip stick, have really long hair. I have no clue why this is also a sexual thing for me, It's odd, I don't even understand why, but it does make me realise how much I hate my male parts.

Me being my true gender is something that does excite me, I don't know why it has developed into what it has, a huge part of me has backed up me being trans into the corner of my mind, until something makes me realise I'm actually a girl, such as jealousy, something I want to try, or cross dressing. that "breaks me out of my cage" and than I spiral into confusion.

I should mention I'm obviously straight (gay).

My gender and sex don't match up, and is causing me a bit of grief, i keep trying to back it into a corner telling myself that I'm never going to be my true self.

This all started at 16, when I first discovered I was gay, and experimented with my sexuality, discovered I was trans, etc. so it's something that has been bothering me for some time. First time I wore a bra, was the first time I ever felt like me. also have fantasies and dreams of me being a female.

I can't fully relate here as I don't have any sort of excitement in that way for crossdressing. I love dressing up though especially cute punkish / goth clothing. It makes me incredibly happy and makes me feel comfortable. I am not to into dresses though, unless they are like lolita type of dresses.

I, myself, am actually quite feminine to and often mask it. Although I do a pretty terrible job of it according to others. So much to the point that when I mention i'm transgender, people often are like oh ... ok, that makes sense. It's funny too, cause when they say that ... it makes me happy but at the same time is a little annoying cause I legitimately try to not show that side of me but some how it comes through no matter what. So I often ask people how? Apparently it's just my body languages and the way I talk, like certain words I use and such.