Wife's Acceptness

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AWH2

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I have read posts about involving a spouse or even telling a spouse about this interest. I admire wives that will even listen to anything about the subject. Mine, I know, would not. I approached the subject from an abstract viewpoint. Read where some elected official was found to have hired a prostitute who would dress him in diapers. Mentioned it to my wife. She was vocal that this would drive her to divorce and I never brought it up again. Guess I was naive to think that she would want to even participate in any way. Should have realized it. Earlier in our marriage I suggested that she wear sexy stuff for me and she turned me down flat.
 
I wonder was she reacting to the diapers or the fact the he hired a prostitute. Also, she may respond differently to your personal situation. I guess you know well enough how much she loves you to potentially accept something like this.
 
Recently, my wife found some of my baby things accidentally. I was thoroughly embarrassed, but decided it was time for me to just admit to my ABDL life. I have been ABDL for a long time and am just tired of hiding it and equally tired of the binge purge cycles that seem to come with hiding. I hope this does not end badly, but it is too early to say.
 
probably the both the prostitute and the diapers. She can get upon her high horse sometimes.
 
I'm not encouraging you to reveal anything but I think it's worth remembering that it's very easy to make sweeping pronouncements of disapproval when it's someone far removed from you. Many people are capable of reevaluating their harsh positions when it affects themselves and/or someone close that they care about.
 
AWH2 said:
I have read posts about involving a spouse or even telling a spouse about this interest. I admire wives that will even listen to anything about the subject. Mine, I know, would not. I approached the subject from an abstract viewpoint. Read where some elected official was found to have hired a prostitute who would dress him in diapers. Mentioned it to my wife. She was vocal that this would drive her to divorce and I never brought it up again. Guess I was naive to think that she would want to even participate in any way. Should have realized it. Earlier in our marriage I suggested that she wear sexy stuff for me and she turned me down flat.

This kind of reminds me of my wife. I've suggested sexy lingerie or something, and she always turns it down. I've tried to get her to open up about what she is interested in, sexually or otherwise, and she tells me she has no idea. Honestly, I believe her... but it makes justifying any kind of diaper play a lot harder.
 
Are you sure you are not married to my wife. My wife's lingerie is all white all cotton. I thought it might change, but I guess not.
 
I would have never lied to my wife, and actively withholding or hiding an integral part of who I am is no different than lying in my book. I made sure to tell her when we were dating and it started to look more serious. For me that was just the third date, but to hold it even past marriage just tells me you're not serious with her and subconsciously don't want to stay together or you'd let her in to your complete life.
 
Slomo said:
I would have never lied to my wife, and actively withholding or hiding an integral part of who I am is no different than lying in my book. I made sure to tell her when we were dating and it started to look more serious. For me that was just the third date, but to hold it even past marriage just tells me you're not serious with her and subconsciously don't want to sta together or you'd let her in to your complete life.

AW is my age, and our generation didn't have the advantage of the internet and the exchange of ideas and support. I didn't tell my wife when we got married. I honestly thought I could forever abandon the desire to wear diapers, and for awhile, I did. I had no desire to wear diapers when we had our own children in diapers, but several years later, it came back with a vengeance.

There are two options here. One is to continue to live without indulging, or only indulging while the wife is gone, and the other is to tell and explain. My wife eventually found a diaper order through Amazon and I had to come clean. It turned out, she was very accepting, but I had told her a lot about myself before we got married, that I lived an exclusively gay lifestyle in college, that I had tried to commit suicide, that I had a psychiatrist while in college, that I had used a lot of drugs and alcohol, and the list went on. We were both free spirits and she loved my craziness.

AW, you know your wife better than us, and from what you've implied, it doesn't sound like she would be accepting. You might try a very different approach sometime, giving her half information such as you like childish things, and see where that goes, but I wouldn't expect much. Also, give yourself an out if she thinks it's weird.
 
I am just over 40 years old and never told my wife. It isn't because I wanted to lie to her. I lied to myself. I told myself I would get over it. It was my fault for not telling her but as I have learn to except myself only recently in the last couple of years. Till then it was binge and purge cycle even when I was single. Now, with that we have been married 14 years. I remember dating her and her seeing an eposide of jerry springer when a ABDL came out. She thought he was demented and not right in the head and couldn't understand. Now on her behalf, she didn't watch that show. It was flipping through channels. But it was powerful enough that I remember it. Thinking to myself. I am messed up and I will change. So I couldn't change and hid from both myself and her. I love that woman more than anything. I want to be the man she sees in me. The creative one, the one that never gives up, the one that believe in the impossible when all else fails (something I think that is the ABDL in me). Then about 8 months ago she found out. I wanted to throw up. I wanted to kill myself (or at least felt like it). She pretty much tossed it to the side after I explained everything. She was fearful our relationship would change. I did not want to change. For me, having accept myself and keeping it something for myself and having my best friend know about it (but not precipate in it) is all I want. I think for everyone what we want is different with our ABDL side. By the way, I do sleep with a paci that she puts in my mouth. Treats me like a kid (not baby) sometimes and I have a stuffed animal she gives me on occasion. No diapers involved with us. I don't think either of us or ready or want that. I very happy where we are. I hope for the best for you.
 
Thank you everyone for your input. Congratulations on those who have been able to involve their spouse even if it is only in a small way. One suggested that I bring it up specifically. I have in a way tried, in a way, to bring it up. A year ago or so, we were on the PA turnpike and I spotted a sign posted just before a rest stop that the next rest stop after that one was closed. After we had passed the last open rest stop I commented that I needed to use the toilet. She did not say anything. As we approached the rest stop, that I new was closed, I commented that I was glad the rest stop was approaching. After seeing the rest stop was closed I commented that I really needed to go. She commented that I should have been more careful. When I did stop at the next open rest stop I got out of the car and wet my pants. She was angry to say the least. It kind of spoiled the weekend.
 
AWH2 said:
Thank you everyone for your input. Congratulations on those who have been able to involve their spouse even if it is only in a small way. One suggested that I bring it up specifically. I have in a way tried, in a way, to bring it up. A year ago or so, we were on the PA turnpike and I spotted a sign posted just before a rest stop that the next rest stop after that one was closed. After we had passed the last open rest stop I commented that I needed to use the toilet. She did not say anything. As we approached the rest stop, that I new was closed, I commented that I was glad the rest stop was approaching. After seeing the rest stop was closed I commented that I really needed to go. She commented that I should have been more careful. When I did stop at the next open rest stop I got out of the car and wet my pants. She was angry to say the least. It kind of spoiled the weekend.

Honestly, I would be angry if my spouse wet her pants, and we both wear diapers. That's just not a cool thing to do! Then you have to get back in the car and stink like pee for the rest of the ride, even if you have a change of clothes, because you can't bathe at a rest stop. If it was truly an accident I would be understanding, but my initial reaction would probably be anger!


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Being single with my youngest just out I have no real worries about being a DL. While I was married I hid it but it was very seldom the urge came. After the divorce it became a sort of surrogate to sex. I thought hard about telling her but my plan was to use the "Honey, I been using Heroin" wait for a bit, then say, no I just wear diapers. It worked when I bought a bass boat lol. I know it's nothing to joke about, it's mind twisting. It's pretty lonely out there after a divorce in your 40's, then add to it our lifestyle. Pretty much given up on meeting anyone anymore. Wish you all the best.
 
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