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Thread: ABDL/Little is secret or not?

  1. #1

    Question ABDL/Little is secret or not?

    I do not really know, but..

    whether the AB/DL or Little is a thing to be kept secret for some people?
    Last edited by MaxToddler; 20-Jun-2016 at 02:15.

  2. #2

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    To tell you the truth, I feel like it depends. It depends on who you tell and what "Side" of AB/DL/Little you want to expose.
    I've told my most trusted friends. One whom knows ALL sides of my Little. My Husband doesn't even know all my Little sides.
    I wouldn't say I'm embarrest about being a Little because I love being cute and loved and cuddled!!!! However, I'm very secretive about my other side, some things my hubby knows... And some things he doesn't, and I'm planning to keep it that way.

  3. #3

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    really well, it depends on the person who wants to hide his true of the public.

    but you know, I was a teenager and I still live with my parents.
    my parents treated me like a toddler so I do not have to hide myself from my parents because they were made to be like this, though I'm also happy.

    perhaps everyone has their own desire to live as a AB / DL / Little so that sometimes there are people who want to keep it secret privacy.


    MaxToddler

  4. #4

  5. #5

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    The vast majority of us seem to be guarded or private about it in most situations, with the notable exceptions being forums, arranged meetup-ups with ABDL or ABDL-aware friends, etc.--situations where we don't expect to be judged. That's easy enough to understand. Outside of these situations, there are plenty of others where we (rightly) conclude that ABDL would either be inappropriate or would be misunderstood in a counterproductive way. For example, going to work in Baby Mode isn't a reality for most of us, and it's not difficult to come up with reasons why discussing ABDL with coworkers--especially if it's a fetish kind of thing--is risky and potentially harmful to one's career. But just generally speaking, the Wider World is full of situations and places where being or appearing to be something other than a whole adult just isn't workable. A very few ABDLs seem to enjoy waging war on those things. I'll tempt a few flames by declaring that, by my own observations, those are usually the people with almost nothing to lose--which I don't mean in a bad way...exactly. But therein lies a big part of the disconnect between the small group of people who view ABDL acceptance as a "cause" and those who don't.

    I know that's bound to have offended somebody, so I apologize in advance.

    So, basically, we're spread around a bit, but I'll wager most are in the "private" corner.

    I consider my DL-ness to be a private thing. It's a fetish. When considering whether I discuss ABDL with somebody, I sort of have to consider: Would it be appropriate for me to discuss any other aspect of my sexuality with this person? In this situation? The answer is almost always "no". Unlike a gay man whose sexuality probably comes paired with a reasonable desire to express affection for his male partner while in public, the diaper aspect of my own sexuality misses nothing by staying in my pants. Truly, nobody needs to know, nor would their knowing help me at all. So privacy is cool with me!
    Last edited by Cottontail; 20-Jun-2016 at 05:24.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cottontail View Post

    I know that's bound to have offended somebody, so I apologize in advance.
    I'm not offended, but I do want to talk about the issue you raised.

    For me, ABDL is complex. It's both fetish and identity. I keep it completely separate from my professional life (and I agree with you 100% that discussing wearing diapers with my coworkers makes no sense), but I'd still like it to gain greater acceptance or at least understanding in the world. I look for example at the recent Tykables episode and how upset people in the local community got, along with either accusations or at least implications that Tyakables was somehow linked to pedophilia. That sort of thing worries me and I'd much prefer that people had a better understanding of what my fetish means so that I don't feel like I'm at risk if I ever make some kind of mistake. I'm not looking for a world where I get to walk around the streets in just a t-shirt and diaper. I'm not really sure I'd want to do that even if I could. But I'd like to live in a world where the worst I'd get if I make an errant Facebook share button click or something, is a little ribbing and some ribald jokes, rather than be at risk of losing my job.

    For my part, I don't think we need a public campaign though. I support the conversation of rights broadly because I think that the narrative around LGBT is one that translates to ABDL as well. Granted, we don't have the same public requirements as a person with a same-sex partner or a person who identifies as the opposite of their gender at birth, but as people come to accept a more live and let live attitude that supports diversity, I think there will be less likelihood of freaking out at new things. I have also told a few close friends (I think it's 5 total now) about being ABDL. I told them not because I wanted to hang out around them constantly diapered, but because I wanted to be comfortable around them and be able to reference ABDL things like any other normal topic in the course of a conversation. And I think that telling a few close friends who then know and understand what ABDL is and that they have an ABDL friend is also one of the best ways to slowly broaden acceptance and reduce the odds of some really bad outcome happening if somebody gets revealed.

    So, I'm not sure what you'd call a middle position between social cause and do nothing, but that's what I'd advocate for. Quiet spread of knowledge, maybe?

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by MaxToddler View Post
    really well, it depends on the person who wants to hide his true of the public.

    but you know, I was a teenager and I still live with my parents.
    my parents treated me like a toddler so I do not have to hide myself from my parents because they were made to be like this, though I'm also happy.

    perhaps everyone has their own desire to live as a AB / DL / Little so that sometimes there are people who want to keep it secret privacy.


    MaxToddler


    Quote Originally Posted by MaxToddler View Post
    really well, it depends on the person who wants to hide his true of the public.

    but you know, I was a teenager and I still live with my parents.
    my parents treated me like a toddler so I do not have to hide myself from my parents because they were made to be like this, though I'm also happy.

    perhaps everyone has their own desire to live as a AB / DL / Little so that sometimes there are people who want to keep it secret privacy.


    MaxToddler


    Hi Max

    It is very rare for me to complete the adult that it to be in an adult head space for long I am usually either a middle headspace or in my little headspace,

    I have thought about getting a school uniform for my self and just coming out to everone. Just like some one that was transgender would. This way I would never have to hide.

    But being a Little is very different to being transgender and i have nothing against anyone that is transgender.

    Rather that just coming out to everyone that you are a Little and have a load of people judge you, probably wrongly, I have found that just being my self around people is better, you give people mission to play with you and they will play with you and I if they ask questions I tell them the truth. But must people don't.

    So don't come out with big statements some of my work colleagues know and some know that i wear Diapers but that becouse they have found out. And have asked me about it. I haven't told us one person that so horrible about it so far.

    Plus there is the labling thing which I hate, you have told us that you are on the autistic spectrum. So you know that some people see the label "autist" and they don't see Max the person.

    My suggestion for you before you say any thing is to ask your self, Why do I need to tell this person? What am I going to get out from telling? If the answer is positive then fine but if not it has nuthing to do with them how you live your life.

    Just be careful out there Little guy.

    You are in a really good situation as well you got your Mummy and Daddy. Or P-Doms as we call them. ( Parent Dominant or Partner Dominant.) It is one of the Daddy and a Mummy roll to keep there Little safe as sum of us do get our self in to hum well humm, situations.

    Before you come out to someone, talk it through with your perents and let them guide you.

    Any way i also long for the day that i can go shopping, cuddling Peter Rabbit, and sucking away on my pasifer.

    If gay people can walk down the street holding hands, becouse it makes them happy and they are accepted by society at large. Then why can't I take my cuddly toy and pasifer that will help me not be anxious in public.

    No FAIR!

    Well one day I hope and I really think that "Little" is more know than we think it is.

    Any way what was the question. Hee, hee

    Hope that help you Max

    Have fun to day. I got to get ready for school (work.) now

    Sisi


  8. #8

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    So I would say at home I am little about 90% of the time. Most of the people I work with know that I am not entirely adult all the time, I color a lot and I have a teddy bear that I take everywhere with me. Like Sisi i think much more middle than adult at any given time I do what I have to when I have to such as going to work to get a paycheck and I pay the bills and do the chores so that life can keep moving forward but I really would prefer it if the world were a little more understanding. Just the simple phrase I have no interest in being around other children I just want to be one. I want to have some little things that I fit in you know the hopes that most little have.
    The only person that knows for sure is my husband but i'm not very good at hiding it especially when I truly get into it. I don't know how to explain it but there are some times when it's harder to be an adult and I'm little 24/7 for a week or so and then I'm ok. It's during those times that I really have a hard time hiding it. There are some days when I feel like I don't care who knows and some days I think about how people at large would feel about me if they knew the truth.
    Wow I'm rambling, sorry. Point is I'm more public than I think a lot of people are but I still don't shout it from the rooftops.

  9. #9
    D1aperBOY

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cottontail View Post
    I consider my DL-ness to be a private thing. It's a fetish. When considering whether I discuss ABDL with somebody, I sort of have to consider: Would it be appropriate for me to discuss any other aspect of my sexuality with this person? In this situation? The answer is almost always "no". Unlike a gay man whose sexuality probably comes paired with a reasonable desire to express affection for his male partner while in public, the diaper aspect of my own sexuality misses nothing by staying in my pants. Truly, nobody needs to know, nor would their knowing help me at all. So privacy is cool with me!
    I feel the same.
    sadly in my case though, I live with my parents and will be doing so for a long time (at least 7 years till I can get married based on the general marriage age in our church) and have run out of diapers.
    this means I either wait till I get a chance to buy some more(most likely going to be a long time) and risk being caught OR face the dreaded situation of telling mum about my DL history which she may not be completely fine with (but if telling her pulls off, it means that I can wear diapers comfortably without the stress of being caught by her [even though there is my sister and father, but she is the one who comes into my room the most, and also who is the only 1 out of the 3 that doesn't work, meaning I could wear after school, in the school holidays etc] AND I may be able to convince her to make/buy me a onesie!!) So I reckon it's worth a shot

  10. #10

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    For the most part my ABDL side is a secret but only my brother (who doesn't really care) and a few college friends (who are DL's) are the only ones that know.

    I like to keep it secret and not let anybody and I deny it if someone calls me out on it or something. I know for a fact that everyone in my family knows I sleep with plushies cause I know they have seen them. I have not been doing a good job of hiding them when they come by. They have not said anything which I really like about it and they are gonna leave it alone if I keep it in my room.

    But in general everything is kept a secret and I don't tell anybody.

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