Do you like having your ab/dl side a secret ?

With all the exposure internationally were getting due to the tykables news I was thinking....
I like my fetish in the closet, it's my own special secret. When I'm wasted a night and I walk around my complex with a diaper on I get a such a rush out of being diapered and knowing I'm involved in a rare fetish.
If we go mainstream I'm afraid it will take a lot of the excitement out of it.
I'm interested to hear everyone else's thoughts on this.

I would call it private rather than secret in my case and I expect it will remain so regardless of how much attention ABDLs get. I can't control how others deal with it, I can only control myself. I don't expect it to be a casual public thing within my lifetime. I don't see that as a desirable goal or sense a progression toward that.

I would like people in general to be more tolerant toward harmless weirdness when it is shared but that will be enough for me. Since my feelings on it pertain to me as a private practitioner and my friends and intimates, I don't really see publicity as a problem.

I will say this, I feared getting caught wearing in public and I sometimes get anxiety wondering if someone found out I was wearing the nite before, but after all that's been going on in the news I think I would be more relaxed getting caught.

Well, if it was safe to be open about being an ABDL it would make it easier to find friends of the same interest in real life.

I don't actually know, I'm still kind of trying to figure that out really. It's only within the last 4 or 5 years that my now-wife convinced me to stop being so ashamed of my medical issues, and that's been connected to my ABDL side since my family first got the internet when I was a kid, it's why I looked this up and got into it in the first place. I've been a lot more open about my incontinence and the fact that I wear diapers than I might otherwise be due to my gaining confidence with her help. I suppose in the end I probably wouldn't bring up that connection outside the internet necessarily, but it does make them a bit more intertwined feeling wise in that regard so it's kind of a grey area for me.

I'm very careful about keeping this a secret, but I'm not sure I've always been successful. I've had some of my adult children just show up at the house, and I go scurrying to hide things. I occasionally wear in public, but I make sure it's not obvious. That said, I like the sense of adventure by wearing in public. The fantasy part of that is a rush.

Huh!

Well, being IC does give good cover...if ever caught...although don't know if i've ever been caught!...

As for secret, I agree with Trevor...More private...

Do many people go around talking about bondage...Yeah a few...But not many compared to how main stream that is!

It's like how often would you talk about your underwear...or anything semi private...Sure with a partner or close friend...

Myself, All my GF's and a few very close friends and my staff(assistants/nurses) know...but, it's nothing I go around advertising...

Now myself, if found out...Without advertising would be odd...As I own my own place, and what I do at home is my business...

Now, that being said I do have house guests for music or film projects staying with me about 20 plus days a month...(Minus lately cuz of some medical issues)...

My master suite and staff rooms are on the 3rd floor and take up the entire west wing of the house...The guests stay in the east wing on the 3rd floor and there only a large 20x50' hallway overlooking the main staircase between them, so without going specifically there not going to enter my suite...And I usually dress in shorts and t-shirt for doing music production...I never dress up anymore...

Bottom line, If someone saw...They went out of their way to look/snoop...and people of that sorta character i don't usually have stay over...I'm a private person...in fact one musician I work with has never even seen of know what my master suite or even the staff rooms look like...

My place is also a place of business and I wouldnt push my personal private affairs on people...As other I've had staying here for sometimes months strait bring GF's and such...I know some don't tell the wife/other GF's...Some do...but thats their business...

As i respect other peoples privacy they do mine...Its quid pro quo...Or some damn thing like that

I would like to remain private until I find a friend I can really trust, I would not tell my mom and dad unless they found out or because I had to, in that case I would tell the truth

I would tell my mom and dad if they agreed to not kick me out for it. Plus seeing as I am funding this life style myself and it does not include weapons (my mom has my brother holding onto my claymore sword and switchblade), it should be tolerable to her. Plus even she knows it wouldn't change (very punny) who I am. I am already a gentle, emotional, and friendly young adult as it is. Also, I noticed even she still talks to others as if I am still a young child, course my memory issues, way I talk, and act probably add to that; but those are things I blindly do. Sure my dad might continue questioning if I am gay because of this or something, and all I would say is "No worries, I am not gay, and you will still be getting more grandchildren."

Do I want people to know that I an an ABDL? Only my partner and other people in the ABDL and fetish communities. I do not discuss the details of my sex life with the rest of my family or with non-kinky friends. I don't particularly want to hear the details of theirs.

Do I want people to know that there are ABDLs? Yes. I would like the existence of ABDLs to be publicized widely. I think it will be much easier for ABDLs to find accepting partners if most people know that ABDL is a thing.

Though I think greater social tolerance of ABDL-hood would be a good thing, I hear what the OP is saying about the excitement of transgressing a boundary. If it were totally normal for adults to wear shortalls, shortalls wouldn't be AB clothes anymore. They'd just be...clothes.

If we lived in an ideal world where we wouldn't be judged and accused of being pedophiles for this harmless and fun kink then yes I would be happy with people knowing unfortunately that's not the world we live in. There was a couple near me who used to run a nursery and appeared on a documentary they were forced to move half way up the country when their neighbors found out and harassed them. If people new about my ABDL side then I imagine I would have real issues continuing to follow my chosen career path. All that being said as others have mentioned I do get a good rush from the whole secrecy element. If I ever tell anybody else it will only be people I meet through ABDL events, sites like this or a significant other if I think they'll be understanding.

I strongly agree with you. I've thought a lot about telling others about my fetish, but I also think it would ruin the excitement of secretly wearing in public.

I'm naturally a very private person and don't share much with anyone, especially something like ABDL, which is something that even if it was publicly accepted, I'd still be extremely private about it.

With that said, I do wish ABDL wasn't so stigmatized, not because I want to share it with everyone (I don't get the people who want to tell co-workers. There is simply NO REASON for them to know), but so that I wouldn't have to worry about serious repercussions if I were outed for some reason and having to worry about people thinking differently of me and possibly firing me or unfriending me. If it was something that was just accepted, I'd still be very private about it, but there would be a couple non-ABDL friends that I would've told and it'd just be something that they'd be apathetic about instead of me worrying about the backlash if I was to tell them in real life.

The simplest response to this question is no. It makes me sad to have to hide such a wonderful part of who I am, but because of a judgemental and callous world that's what we must do. So no I don't like it, but I've gotten used to the fact that I have to....at least from most. The reason I love my teddy soooo much, is he doesn't have a judgemental bone in his body (come to think of it...he has no bones in his body....I guess that's why he's so cuddly :hugs: )

Well in my case i keep it a secret even tho there are friends that knows that i like being an AB/DL. But is like the post says, it would take the fun away if it starts to get all knowing around people. Plus i don't want to have those opinion closed minded people give when they don't know nothing about our fetish or lifestyles.

I prefer like having that rush of going out and your diaper peeking out from your jeans or going to a beach when there is no one around and dropping your pants and just be in a shirt and diaper getting all that breeze in your legs.

Carolus said:

I don't actually know, I'm still kind of trying to figure that out really. It's only within the last 4 or 5 years that my now-wife convinced me to stop being so ashamed of my medical issues, and that's been connected to my ABDL side since my family first got the internet when I was a kid, it's why I looked this up and got into it in the first place. I've been a lot more open about my incontinence and the fact that I wear diapers than I might otherwise be due to my gaining confidence with her help. I suppose in the end I probably wouldn't bring up that connection outside the internet necessarily, but it does make them a bit more intertwined feeling wise in that regard so it's kind of a grey area for me.

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You shouldn't be ashamed it if is a medical issue. I have an employee who reports to me that also wears diapers. He is a great employee. It is not different than on having asthma or any other medical issues. Diapers do no define who you are. As for me, I am not but enjoy diapers and being AB/DL. My wife knows but she is the only person that knows. I am good with that. She just recently found out. I struggle with being ashamed when it is a non-medical issue. But please, be proud of who you are!

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My diapers is a secret. My wife only recently found out like a month ago. All things aside, it went better than expected. She isn't into the diaper thing and honestly, I am not sure I want her to be. I am more than my diapers and being an AB. Most of the time on my Fridays, I work from home. Since I am alone, I am in diapers, a onesie, a pacifier, and baby bottle by my desk. But, I love my job. I love my wife because she sees something in me that I strive to be. My wife excepts it but I don't wear a diaper around her. With that being sad, I do sleep with a pacifier and a stuff animal that my 5 year old daughter gave to me when she was 3. The kids know I do this but that is it. I don't want them exposed to all of it. Everyone is different. I think we all need to learn to know what being in diapers and if the AB side applied what that means to you and your life. For me, it is a fraction of who I am.

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I understand the rush of the secret, but it's hard being secretive about it cause it means I'm less likely to find someone like me. I'm very torn on the matter.

The fact that I wear diapers and that I'm IC is private - I don't shove it in people's faces, but I organise it in a way that's convenient for me. I keep my diapers in my underwear drawer, I use bed protection, I own onesies which I keep in my closet. If someone looked there, they'd find them, but they shouldn't be looking there.

The fact that I'm DL is secret. I keep it under lock and key.

I would like to live in a world when I could wear diapers when ever and where ever I like and people not caring that I like to wear diapers for fun. Also I would like to be myself more by doing more AB things like drinking from my bottle instead of a cup sometimes and carrying my plushie around sometimes.

Unfortunately I can't so in the current world we live in I like to hide because I have no idea what I would do if people found out about me. I would kind of like to have it both ways but I can't.