Our rights as a different "community"

[Aby]

This is something that's still very much a rough idea in my head. I am 43 and have watched society progress to accepting the rights of others that were once considered "wrong" such as LGTQ and Trans communities. However I don't see anything being done to protect us, its like this is still only seen as a perversion by most groups, including some in the LGTQ yadyada alphabet people (I am bisexual I think the term alphabet people is funny, not hurtful)

I mean with in our own group we tend to have people that may go to far, and we call them cringe worthy, which is what the general public feels about out entire group. We can't open up a store to sell adult baby diapers without communities freaking out and asking what about the children?

We have members of our own group that like to say things like you can't let your diaper show in public as they haven't consented to your choice of expression, which is the same stupid argument that people tried to use against homosexuals kissing or showing affection in public.
And the there are scumbags like me that see things in a much broader picture and will compare the struggles of different groups and get everyone offended for daring to compare the struggle that say someone in the trans world goes through to the struggle of an ABDL person, and people feel that they can say its offensive to a trans person to have their identity struggle compared to some low life creep that get sexual kicks off of wearing diapers or is a pedo for liking other littles in a sexual manner, evan though its very clear I only like adults. Even I say somethings are cringeworthy and sometimes they are, its a subjective opinion as like i said earlier the general public thinks we are all cringe worthy, they dont give a damn if we are just a diaper lover, someone that gets a sexual kick out of it, or someone that is using it as a coping mechanism or someone that simply identifies as a child....

When will there be a famous celebrity that comes out and become a shining role model and is treated as bold and brave and made person of the year? Its never going to happen because we are among the lowest of the scum of the Earth when the general publics opinion comes in.
They did everything they could do shut down the Tykables store, the mayor wouldn't even watch the video that caused trouble as she didn't want to see stuff that she couldn't unsee, and that this had such a huge ick factor, the residents were afraid for their children, the store had a locked door and you couldn't see in through the windows anymore after complaints were made about the huge prop baby crib or building blocks in the windows.

Where does it end? Like I said this is a very rough form of my thoughts and I am still thinking about this. Do I wan th right to go out as a baby, no, but should I feel shame if my diaper is exposed in some way? Should I constantly be tucking my shirts in and forever paranoid that someone might notice? Certainly some modesty is appreciated by the general public, but that's a grey area too. Is it obscene to wear a diaper at say the beach ? It is not a usual thing to see at the beach, and it can be off putting to some, but then again so is things like same sex kisses or men dressed as women or transgender folks.

If our pants rip in public and everyone can see our underwear, should we face a greater shame than someone in regular underwear?
Now for most of us this is not a physical need, but as we grow older some will become incontinent, should we feel shame and be like everyone else that is incontinent, hidden away and never to be seen or smelt?

I know that this will probably upset some people who will read this and jump to the conclusion that I want to make ABDL equal to other groups and that I am soooooooo ignorant and stupid and should have died in the hole I fell in.

I am not saying anything that those people think I am saying, I am thinking openly and honestly curious when the general public become aware of us enough that we will need some legal protections like other people in other marginalized groups. When will there be education about people like us, and how its not a shameful thing, that its not harming anyone or connected to pedo crap.

Anyways that ws my thoughts today, go ahead and cue the folks that get pissed off at open thinking so they can come tell me what a horrible person I am and that I have zero understanding of what REAL suffering is like.

 

[messydiaper]

I will speak from my perspective as a white, hetero, cis, married male well into middle age whose wife plays along with my DL side. I can now buy really good diapers discreetly. There are two physical stores in my area that carry tremendous selections of ABDL diapers and clothing. I view my propensity like any other fetish and that unless I choose to go to a private event, I keep ABDL in my home and have no need for it to exist outside of that.

If I were into enemas and bondage, I wouldn't have any expectation for enemas and bondage to somehow be accepted in a public way. ABDL is similar. I am free to wear diapers in public, but if I begin to make public wearing a sexual thing, that wouldn't be okay.

I feel like our community has all the acceptance it needs to practice a wide variety of preferences discreetly.

 

[Aby]

I will speak from my perspective as a white, hetero, cis, married male well into middle age whose wife plays along with my DL side. I can now buy really good diapers discreetly. There are two physical stores in my area that carry tremendous selections of ABDL diapers and clothing. I view my propensity like any other fetish and that unless I choose to go to a private event, I keep ABDL in my home and have no need for it to exist outside of that.

If I were into enemas and bondage, I wouldn't have any expectation for enemas and bondage to somehow be accepted in a public way. ABDL is similar. I am free to wear diapers in public, but if I begin to make public wearing a sexual thing, that wouldn't be okay.

I feel like our community has all the acceptance it needs to practice a wide variety of preferences discreetly.

I get that, but how far does it go, like my example of a community freaking out over an ABDL diaper store opening up near there residential areas. It like should I be shamed for carrying around a bag of diapers? Does it need to all go in a black bag like they use at adult pornography stores? What about someone in short-alls? fairly acceptable for women but not men in some places?
And then the argument goes back to consent of the public to view your public personal expression through clothing, how far does that go, would footed pajamas be tooo much(in some places yeah)

I do agree discretion is advised, but that could be said for gay couples wanting to hold hands or kiss in public. (by close minded people)
There was a time when homosexuality was tolerated as long wasn't on display in public, same could be said for some trans folks, yet even in our own community we consider ourselves to be icky or disturbing.

 

[varis67]

OP- I agree with much of what you've said.
I too have seen posts where someone says that they've been out in public and their waistband "peeked" out over their jeans, and others practically crucify them.
There are some who say it's ok to use a pacifier in public and others who say it's exposing people to your fetish.
The reality is that there is no "right" answer. It all comes down to each person's opinion. When I worked in the wedding industry as a DJ, there were people that thought some songs were perfect for a wedding and others that thought those same songs were horribly inappropriate.

Overall, I think that there is definitely more acceptance of our community vs 10 years ago, or 20 years, 30 years, etc. This is definitely a result of people being able to connect online.
I once read that society's acceptance of ABDL is about 100 years behind the acceptance of LGBTQ+. ergo, 100 years from now the level of acceptance that the LGBTQ+ community has now, is what we can look forward to.
(yes I know that the LGBTQ+ community is still struggling)
This is why it is important for ALL ABDLs to make sure that we all take steps to ensure that we are seen in as positive light as possible.
Like when TV shows want to interview or do stories on an ABDL we have to take steps to ensure that they will paint ABDLs in a good way and not in a CSI creepy way.

People will always fear what they do not understand. It's stupid and scary, but unfortunately it is reality. I think many within our community long for the days when we can just be ourselves at all times and in all places.

 

[LainIsLain]

I think many within our community long for the days when we can just be ourselves at all times and in all places.

This is something that's still very much a rough idea in my head. I am 43 and have watched society progress to accepting the rights of others that were once considered "wrong" such as LGTQ and Trans communities. However I don't see anything being done to protect us, its like this is still only seen as a perversion by most groups, including some in the LGTQ yadyada alphabet people (I am bisexual I think the term alphabet people is funny, not hurtful)

I mean with in our own group we tend to have people that may go to far, and we call them cringe worthy, which is what the general public feels about out entire group. We can't open up a store to sell adult baby diapers without communities freaking out and asking what about the children?

We have members of our own group that like to say things like you can't let your diaper show in public as they haven't consented to your choice of expression, which is the same stupid argument that people tried to use against homosexuals kissing or showing affection in public.
And the there are scumbags like me that see things in a much broader picture and will compare the struggles of different groups and get everyone offended for daring to compare the struggle that say someone in the trans world goes through to the struggle of an ABDL person, and people feel that they can say its offensive to a trans person to have their identity struggle compared to some low life creep that get sexual kicks off of wearing diapers or is a pedo for liking other littles in a sexual manner, evan though its very clear I only like adults. Even I say somethings are cringeworthy and sometimes they are, its a subjective opinion as like i said earlier the general public thinks we are all cringe worthy, they dont give a damn if we are just a diaper lover, someone that gets a sexual kick out of it, or someone that is using it as a coping mechanism or someone that simply identifies as a child....

When will there be a famous celebrity that comes out and become a shining role model and is treated as bold and brave and made person of the year? Its never going to happen because we are among the lowest of the scum of the Earth when the general publics opinion comes in.
They did everything they could do shut down the Tykables store, the mayor wouldn't even watch the video that caused trouble as she didn't want to see stuff that she couldn't unsee, and that this had such a huge ick factor, the residents were afraid for their children, the store had a locked door and you couldn't see in through the windows anymore after complaints were made about the huge prop baby crib or building blocks in the windows.

Where does it end? Like I said this is a very rough form of my thoughts and I am still thinking about this. Do I wan th right to go out as a baby, no, but should I feel shame if my diaper is exposed in some way? Should I constantly be tucking my shirts in and forever paranoid that someone might notice? Certainly some modesty is appreciated by the general public, but that's a grey area too. Is it obscene to wear a diaper at say the beach ? It is not a usual thing to see at the beach, and it can be off putting to some, but then again so is things like same sex kisses or men dressed as women or transgender folks.

If our pants rip in public and everyone can see our underwear, should we face a greater shame than someone in regular underwear?
Now for most of us this is not a physical need, but as we grow older some will become incontinent, should we feel shame and be like everyone else that is incontinent, hidden away and never to be seen or smelt?

I know that this will probably upset some people who will read this and jump to the conclusion that I want to make ABDL equal to other groups and that I am soooooooo ignorant and stupid and should have died in the hole I fell in.

I am not saying anything that those people think I am saying, I am thinking openly and honestly curious when the general public become aware of us enough that we will need some legal protections like other people in other marginalized groups. When will there be education about people like us, and how its not a shameful thing, that its not harming anyone or connected to pedo crap.

Anyways that ws my thoughts today, go ahead and cue the folks that get pissed off at open thinking so they can come tell me what a horrible person I am and that I have zero understanding of what REAL suffering is like.

Ok I'll chime in with my "maybe" unpopular opinion.

This is the crux of the matter I think. Rapid social change is happening no doubt. The question is how much and how fast. Devils advocate here, what does society look like with no filter on outward identity expression?

I feel fortunate to live in the Pacific NW are where "most" people are pretty accepting of these kinds of expressions that go against the social norms. I've even had my mind changed on matter of gay and trans subjects as I got older. The struggle for society is what base line social norm is acceptable and how that change is integrated into society. A good base line of outward professionalism is important. Yes I wear my bibs and diaper out now but I always interact with people on a polite and professional manner.

Yes the diaper wearing creeps people out, but the loss of the polite interaction is the icing on the proverbial cake. What happens with "no" filters? A true to life tower of babel. A mode of interaction that is only accepted and understood by the members of those communities. A mode of interaction with it's own expressions, clothing, symbols, and even language(terms only understood by the community).

As different identity expressions become acceptable there will always be the "next" group that has been marginalized and needs to "speek up" for it's rights.

Would I be wearing diapers if I weren't in this community? Yes! Would I have found diapers if I didn't know about the term ABDL? Probably yes!

I feel comfortable wearing a diaper in public now but I will always try to keep things professional even if others don't. I think that's the best we can hope for right now. I haven't been outed but when that happens I will take that in stride. I know this isn't the case for everyone around the world and I hope I don't come off sounding like a douche bag.

 

[Boo]

ABDLCGLAGERE

 

[Subtlerustle]

This is why it is important for ALL ABDLs to make sure that we all take steps to ensure that we are seen in as positive light

I agree and would suggest showing up in a retail store with nothing but a tee shirt and a diaper won’t be received in a positive way. The other thread showed the guy get memed and shamed on social media. If we all did that the backlash would set the Abdl community back a long way. So while it may be in ones “right” to do that, it’s not going to help the community be seen in a positive light.

 

[Aby]

I agree and would suggest showing up in a retail store with nothing but a tee shirt and a diaper won’t be received in a positive way. The other thread showed the guy get memed and shamed on social media. If we all did that the backlash would set the Abdl community back a long way. So while it may be in ones “right” to do that, it’s not going to help the community be seen in a positive light.

Thats kind of like how gays were accepted as long as they didn't hold hands or kissed in public, we have to ask ourselves asas a society just what is the hang up with seeing an adult in a diaper, compared to a speedo or regular underwear? Is the guy on the other thread at the cashier buying stuff in a diaper really breaking any laws, is it indecent exposure? Was he gratifying himself? Would people have any gratification if the act of wearing a diaper in public wasn't taboo? I find it in bad taste myself but then I can be critical of normal people clothing, I wonder why that guy was in there, was it for cheap thrills? Did his pants have an issue and he had to pay for gas? was it halloween? Would that image lose its value or power of spectacle is it was not some great shameful taboo for adults to wear diapers? Are we harming ourselves by perpetuating the shame mentality of diapers on adults, that this must be something hidden?

My mind is kinda floating around tonight so I am not sure what to think of many of these issues. I can go from ultra discreet to who gives damn. But then my situation is slowly evolving as I deal with minor incontinence, and with the consideration that this is not just a kink or coping mechanism for me, much like being in the closet as a bisexual, this is a form of being in the closet, hiding a fairly huge part of my identity, much like an orientation, its not something I can really change.

 

[Calico]

Okay I'm gonna bite, why do ABDLs feel the need to expose their diapers to the open? I don't see people do that with their underwear or with their bras. Diapers are underwear, treat them as such. Our bathroom business is done in restrooms, diaper changes should be treated the same way, part of our bathroom business. People say they have to use the restroom, that is all we need to say too when we need to change. People don't tell others that they need to pee or poo, why should diaper changes be any different?

Forget the anti 24/7 wearers, forget the anti wearing in public wearers. Their opinions don't concern us.

There is a difference between your diaper peeking out on accident and doing it intentionally. Even underwear sometimes sticks out sometimes. But no one goes out of their way to intentionally expose them to the public.


If someone gets fired for wearing diapers, I am gonna assume they were being an idiot about it. Maybe they were not practicing good hygiene with it, not wearing a proper diaper so they kept leaking all over, maybe they had their face photos shown online and the company didn't want that to reflect on them badly, if they work with kids, this is even more understandable why they were fired.

Be smart; hide your face, wear them discreetly under your clothes, wear a good diaper, drink plenty of water.

As for wanting to go as a baby in public, there are appropriate clothing for that, buy clothes with characters on them or prints you find in stores and wear those. Also everyone has a work uniform to wear to work so not being able to wear your child like clothing wouldn't be any different. Everyone has a dress code for work.


If it causes you so much distress that you cannot expose your diapers to the public and can't change in front of anyone or can't wear AB clothing in public, or can't wear your store bought childish clothing to work, get therapy.

This is a my general response, not directly to the OP.

 

[Aby]

I have bought stuff in nothing but a Huggies label t-shirt and a novelty sized adult diaper made to look like a baby diaper, but it was Halloween and I could get away with that kinda silliness. It wasn't sexually gratifying, but did feel very.. I hate to say it, liberating, people were honking and laughing and complimenting me on my costume. The only negative was a few teen boys falling me around the grocery store, I needed Beer and some powder and wipes. My profile picture is from that night. I made it to wear even if I wet my diaper it would not show, as it was sealed inside an outer large novelty sized diaper. I got drunk and made a fool out of myself that night, but had no real party fouls and i don't regret it, I also won best costume and got kissed by lots of girls.

Would I do it again? Probably not, once was enough, it was an experience that I won't forget, and it probably outed me to some people, this was in 09. I was also a different person back then, I think I was desperate for some form of acceptance, as I did not really accept myself and had been alone for a long time.

 

[Aby]

Okay I'm gonna bite, why do ABDLs feel the need to expose their diapers to the open? I don't see people do that with their underwear or with their bras. Diapers are underwear, treat them as such. Our bathroom business is done in restrooms, diaper changes should be treated the same way, part of our bathroom business. People say they have to use the restroom, that is all we need to say too when we need to change. People don't tell others that they need to pee or poo, why should diaper changes be any different?

Forget the anti 24/7 wearers, forget the anti wearing in public wearers. Their opinions don't concern us.

There is a difference between your diaper peeking out on accident and doing it intentionally. Even underwear sometimes sticks out sometimes. But no one goes out of their way to intentionally expose them to the public.


If someone gets fired for wearing diapers, I am gonna assume they were being an idiot about it. Maybe they were not practicing good hygiene with it, not wearing a proper diaper so they kept leaking all over, maybe they had their face photos shown online and the company didn't want that to reflect on them badly, if they work with kids, this is even more understandable why they were fired.

Be smart; hide your face, wear them discreetly under your clothes, wear a good diaper, drink plenty of water.

As for wanting to go as a baby in public, there are appropriate clothing for that, buy clothes with characters on them or prints you find in stores and wear those. Also everyone has a work uniform to wear to work so not being able to wear your child like clothing wouldn't be any different. Everyone has a dress code for work.


If it causes you so much distress that you cannot expose your diapers to the public and can't change in front of anyone or can't wear AB clothing in public, or can't wear your store bought childish clothing to work, get therapy.

This is a my general response, not directly to the OP

A t-shirt and a diaper is the costume of a child, everyone has there different things they like, my experience didn't leave me walking around with a huge hard on, it left me feeling authentically naked, like I had taken my adult costume off, here was the true me walking down the store and buying beer and getting lots of laughs and few uncomfortable or disapproving looks. But again that was halloween and it was a fresh clean diaper that was over the real fresh clean diaper under neath it, and my exposure was limited to about 20 minutes at about 7 pm on halloween night. I certainly wasn't the worst dressed that day.
Maybe think of it as desperate attempts by alter identities to be valid in real life, to have outward expression of that identity in the pubic eye and not just the minds eye, people screaming for some kind of connection from that alter persona.

 

[LainIsLain]

Okay I'm gonna bite, why do ABDLs feel the need to expose their diapers to the open? I don't see people do that with their underwear or with their bras. Diapers are underwear, treat them as such. Our bathroom business is done in restrooms, diaper changes should be treated the same way, part of our bathroom business. People say they have to use the restroom, that is all we need to say too when we need to change. People don't tell others that they need to pee or poo, why should diaper changes be any different?

Forget the anti 24/7 wearers, forget the anti wearing in public wearers. Their opinions don't concern us.

There is a difference between your diaper peeking out on accident and doing it intentionally. Even underwear sometimes sticks out sometimes. But no one goes out of their way to intentionally expose them to the public.


If someone gets fired for wearing diapers, I am gonna assume they were being an idiot about it. Maybe they were not practicing good hygiene with it, not wearing a proper diaper so they kept leaking all over, maybe they had their face photos shown online and the company didn't want that to reflect on them badly, if they work with kids, this is even more understandable why they were fired.

Be smart; hide your face, wear them discreetly under your clothes, wear a good diaper, drink plenty of water.

As for wanting to go as a baby in public, there are appropriate clothing for that, buy clothes with characters on them or prints you find in stores and wear those. Also everyone has a work uniform to wear to work so not being able to wear your child like clothing wouldn't be any different. Everyone has a dress code for work.


If it causes you so much distress that you cannot expose your diapers to the public and can't change in front of anyone or can't wear AB clothing in public, or can't wear your store bought childish clothing to work, get therapy.

This is a my general response, not directly to the OP.

Agree! Expression is ok. Wear your diaper under clothes and feel good. Wear colorful clothes with prints. When it comes to work you need to be professional! In public understand the balance between self expression and being obnoxious. There's plenty of leeway here.

However, you can't expect for everyone to abide by the understanding that negative interactions effect the standing of the ABDL community and the public opinion of it. Be the one that represents a sane example of the community and make an impression that goes against the stereotypes. I'm relatively new here and this is how I will conduct myself.

 

[StupidApple]

Most BDSM sub communities will probably never be accepted.

 

[LainIsLain]

identity in the pubic eye and not just the minds eye, people screaming for some kind of connection from that alter persona.

The "pubic eye"....! Sorry don't mean to laugh but for some reason that was super funny as I read it!!

 

[Aby]

The "pubic eye"....! Sorry don't mean to laugh but for some reason that was super funny as I read it!!

unintentional mistake, funny though, I might not fix it.

 

[TeddyBearCowboy]

This is something that's still very much a rough idea in my head. I am 43 and have watched society progress to accepting the rights of others that were once considered "wrong" such as LGTQ and Trans communities. However I don't see anything being done to protect us, its like this is still only seen as a perversion by most groups, including some in the LGTQ yadyada alphabet people (I am bisexual I think the term alphabet people is funny, not hurtful)

... ...We can't open up a store to sell adult baby diapers without communities freaking out and asking what about the children?

There are already medical supply stores out there that offer ABDL products that don't have the stigma that Tykables has had. These are both online and even brick and mortar locations. Northshore, XP-medical, and others are an example of online success stories. I live in the Rocky Mountains, USA and there is a store within 200 miles of me called KAL medical and they have all sorts of ABDL diapers, onesies, pacifiers and bottles too that are mingled right within other medical supply products. I haven't heard of any of the outrage that happened with Tykables as a purely ABDL store. I think they even now have two stores.

Gradually, and slowly there is a greater understanding of our community. This is the same steps that have happened with other often misunderstood or discriminated against groups. Throughout all of recorded history, it seems that people have had a tendency to look at others who are different than they are, or who believe or act differently as something to not only be avoided, but perhaps shamed. Many of these previously discriminated against groups have made some progress, but still a great discrimination remains. I do not think that will ever completely go away. But there is hope that things can become better.

I highly doubt that being ABDL will ever become a "protected class" such as ethnic, religious, gender, age, etc. But, I do think that as society sees more of things such as ABDL themed products out there, not just in a fetish way, but offered in a legitimate manner, such as is being done in the online and actual on-the-ground stores as mentioned above, there will be less stigma associated with it. Also, I think even the marketing of incontinence products such as has been done with Depends and other companies lowers the stigma associated with adult diapers and makes it less unacceptable, as people stop thinking it is so "gross" to wear a diaper, as many people need them. And, as this happens, then the thought of others wearing them who might not have to, also is less such of an issue.

Have you seen how many stores now have footed pajamas that are on their clothes racks? This certainly used to be an icon for a baby, but now they are offered mainstream in stores and becoming a popular product!

Also, (and I'm sorry, this is still stigmatic for me, so it seems a bit of a shock) what is up with all of the "poo" icons and products that are now out there? This used to be something that would have totally been unheard of, but you find all sorts of products out there that have "poo" as an image or even plushies (HEAVEN HELP US) that are of poo. **See, even for me who is ABDL I still have my own stigma thoughts of it being wrong to have a poo plushie. For most of my childhood and even adult life, you simply didn't talk about poo and sure as heck wouldn't have it on a keychain, or on your t-shirt, or use it as an emoji! My point here is that even talking about poo is becoming less gross and stigmatic as a whole. I mean, come on, you can buy these things now at Walmart!

Aby, from your posts you have said you are 43, and as such, you have been around a while. But think back to when you were a teenager and look at the differences around you as to how things that are somewhat, or evenly blatantly ABDL related are now more accepted than before.

There will always be those who do not accept ABDLism, the same as to any other group that is different than the "norm". But I would suggest that there is much less stigma and more tolerance for our community than there was even a decade ago. But in your quest for being accepted, you have to also reach out and look through the eyes of others who may not be accepting of you. And as such, be willing to accept them for their own perceptions and lifestyles, which may include not understanding of us or thinking we are a bit off because of our interests.

 

[nwm]

WOW - took a while to read that whole thread!
Anyway now that I have...
Yes there could be more acceptance in general - that I believe is going to come down to education about it (the whole picture - not just the small clips on the news now and then, or negatively spun in depth reporting, or half true Internet reports/posts, ex.), and to a point actually seeing us (some may well be shocked that they actually know some of us but had no idea).
HOWEVER - as pointed out, you also NEED to use some discretion as to when, where, and to what extent!
I now plenty of times it has been pretty obvious I had a diaper on, but not deliberately exposed - and while I know others did notice, no one said anything, or acted any different. There were also other times it was quite intentionally exposed, but that was situation I had a good idea no one was going to care (at least in any significant way). The same applies to a lot of other things.
What would you like to do? - Perhaps a whole protest, in full gear? - Well, not that there is anything wrong with that, but if you are going to do so, you should have a clear message - not just "Hay, I exist" - also for sure NOT the right time - too cold right now for one, and also while protests are still allowed (constitutionally protected) with covid still a problem, not good right now - dangerous for those participating (masks help, but are not a total shield!), and even if it goes off fine- you are still an idiot to take a chance over something like that- it could have waited - specially when there IS a few vaccines now - a least let most get that first!
Bottom line - while it may be nice, I see no real reason why anything needs to be rushed, I personally see no true discrimination - not as long as you do practice some discretion/common seance anyway. Although SOME situations I could see it might be perceived that way.

 

[Aby]

I wouldn't say protected class, at least not anytime soon, however things are changing I have read of at least one family lawyer that specializes in abdl related cases, I believe one case was a parental rights case where the ex had said her husband was a creep and wore diapers, so the lawyer goes in and explains to the courts the ABDL scene. I could see some protections being made in anti discrimination for people who are abdl and are not breaking any laws, like a land lord kicking someone out after seeing a package of diapers in the trash or a package delivery, or any accidental reveal of abdl identity.

I do see how much things have changed, I look forward to what we can do to create the change we desire. I still look forward to one day seeing an abdl character as a main character in a popular production, not a comedy, but something that shows the humanity, I am wondering when we stop being just a joke or used as a meme. a day when maybe its not a big deal and no one cares if someone's outed as an abdl.

See we have come a long way, but we must always remain in the shadows, or we get the same hate that other groups use to get. Its great that some pharmacies now sell abdl style diapers, they can do that as the stores are for medical supplies and they don't get publicity that stores like tykables get. I have been to an ABDL store in vegas, it was very refreshing to walk around and browse the selection, it was a much happier environment than a pharmacy, a place where I felt I can relax a little.

Some of my thoughts on this were triggered from the video I watched yesterday of the tykables store court hearing, the town tried to claim they were tricked and the owner had left out plans to let people take pictures in his store, the community was outraged and "thinking of the children"
The store owner took down the video of him saying that people could take pictures in the store and has a dress code policy, put curtain on all the windows so no one can see in, and has a door that people have to be buzzed in to get in.
Community wanted the town to regularly make inspection inside the store, to make sure that those weirdos aren't having a party. the mayor said she couldn't watch the video because of the ick factor and there are some things you just can't unsee, like a guy in a diaper. So its stuff like this where a town tries to close down a legit business that isn't breaking any laws that makes me say, yes we do need some protections. The tykables store should probably move to a more accepting area, but I don't know the area well. The town wouldn't shut it down though as they couldn't find any law that would let them shut it down, and the store is making millions.

what I saw was institutionalized discrimination of a legal business due to it catering ABDL people, what I saw was hatred and misunderstanding coupled with fear. A very dangerous mix.

 

[Aby]

I am very accepting of people that would never accept me, I worked with them, lived with them, and many of them are good friends. But should the truth be known, they would dump me in an instant. I already had people do that when I came out as bisexual, I still care for them. I care for pretty much all the groups and people out there, but many of them would condemn me.

While I see more capitalization on the ABDL scene I am not sure it is more acceptable, and its still very misunderstood, and only considered a kink by many, including people in our own community. And the pedo connection is still brought up, even by people in our own community.

I can be pessimistic at times though

 

[varis67]

People will always fear what they don't understand. Unfortunately many people don't want to understand the ABDL community.
Obviously I don't advocate the idea of going out in public wearing only a diaper and t-shirt, but a thought to consider:
Walk around a busy place such as a mall. Chances are good you will see a young woman wearing a leather collar with spikes, or grommets in it. Now she could be wearing it simply as a fashion accessory or it could be to symbolize her desires within BDSM.
At what point does she cross the line? At what point is she "exposing" her fetish desires to others?
I used to date a girl that wore her spiked collar all the time because she liked to show that she was a dominant.
I also had a young woman who was a colleague that always wore her collar simply because she liked it as a fashion accessory. (she also wore studded leather bracelets)

I believe that every situation is different.
Wearing a diaper and t-shirt to a fetish nightclub? - probably ok
Wearing the same to your local playground in the middle of the day while children are present?- Definitely not OK/ CREEPY as hell/ you should be arrested.

Wearing a diaper under your jeans with the waistband poking out while you go about your business? - let's face it, chances are it's not even going to be noticed because people are so self-involved they don't even notice when something is right in front of them. (if I had a nickel for every time someone has stopped me in Home Depot thinking I work there, and asked me where is X? and it is less than 10 feet away...)