I wear the always discreet dispsosible bladder control bikinis. Very thin, very assorbant, and undetected. I do like wearing control top pantyhose over them, but these fit like regular panties, and don't need the control top or control panties to keep them from sagging. I to got into the leggings thing this winter. Sure kept me warm, when I got out of bed to fix coffee.
Statistically speaking, the chances are higher finding ABDL or the like in regions of high population density like metro areas. We are one in a million or so. Feel bad for the Aby that lives in rural areas. Huggs!