Why is wearing and using a diaper so taboo?

[DLsecretlittle]

I keep going back to this thought: something as “dirty “ as anal sex is normalized, while simply wearing a diaper, not even using it, is “disgusting.” Why? It seems so arbitrary.

 

[RedPandaDL]

Because most people just don’t understand it.

 

[Halibut]

If your just talking about sex, people think diapers are nasty because they're associated with human waste and babys. Two things most people don't want to have sex with.

But if sex isn't an issue, I don't think anyone would find an adult in a diaper gross. But It might seem sad or funny. Part of potty training is teaching kids to not use diapers since diapers are for babies. Most of the time, kids don't want to be babies, they want to be mature, and other kids will mock them if they fall short. Those feelings just don't go away when you grow up. The real issue with clean diapers is that they are embarrassing, not dirty.

 

[dogboy]

Part of it stems from our early potty training. We were told that we wanted to be a big boy/girl, and that having pee and poop on you was dirty, etc. We've all been well conditioned. Add to that that only babies wear diapers and people who have a genuine need for them makes wearing them for pleasure not accepted by the general population.

Most people can not wrap their mind around an adult wanting to act and feel like a baby/toddler, wanting to dress like a baby, drink from a bottle or sippy cup, etc. We will always have a tough time convincing society that what we do is somewhere close to normal.

 

[Spidermanbatman]

I have to agree with what others have expressed. It all goes to the idea that society has been conditioned to believe that diapers are for babies, or perhaps, infirm/elderly/sick/disabled people. "Normal", healthy people have no reason to wear diapers past potty-training (except perhaps for a bit at night) and even then, if your child is slow to learn those skills, it's assumed that something is wrong with you as a parent.


This is something we're sort of dealing with now with my oldest, who is 9. He was *very* late to potty train -2 months after his 5th birthday --and hasn't had a dry night in his life. My wife is *mortified* that he is wearing a "diaper" (a Goodnite) to bed, and feels that it is babyish and that he's the only one in his class with this issue (which I doubt). It's something that we've argued about, because I'm not willing to let him wake up in soaking wet pajamas every morning and don't want to have to strip the bed and do laundry every morning over something he's doing while unaware.

 

[12srepaid]

I'm trying to figure out how to Express my thoughts on this. Anyway it bothers me deeply that people say that only a few groups are allowed to wear diapers. But how dare someone like an older child wear diapers for bedwetting or a disability like Autism. Or an adult that has Chrones or some other kind of disease that either causes incontinence issues, or just too weak to get to the toilet in time.
I really despise when parents treat their kids like babies just because he or she is a bedwetter and has to wear diapers.

In my mind, I dis-associate babies and diapers, even if they do wear them. Becausexanyohe that needs them should be able to wear them, and its
nobody else's business why.

 

[winterheart01]

I'm trying to figure out how to Express my thoughts on this. Anyway it bothers me deeply that people say that only a few groups are allowed to wear diapers. But how dare someone like an older child wear diapers for bedwetting or a disability like Autism. Or an adult that has Chrones or some other kind of disease that either causes incontinence issues, or just too weak to get to the toilet in time.
I really despise when parents treat their kids like babies just because he or she is a bedwetter and has to wear diapers.

In my mind, I dis-associate babies and diapers, even if they do wear them. Becausexanyohe that needs them should be able to wear them, and its
nobody else's business why.

Exactly this.
My mother is very angry that i prefer to wear diapers just because I get urges every 10 - 15 minutes and that going to the toilet so often means jeopardising work, she found out about my preferences so that makes it even harder, she's very conditioned that only the earlier mentioned groups can and may wear them....
She reacted with "So, after that botox, it's going to be allright again right???" ....while she doesn't understand it will never be allright anymore, I don't know how I can possibly make her understand.
She's the type that said that even if she would need diapers she refuses to wear them because she hates them.

 

[bambinod]

Exactly this.
My mother is very angry that i prefer to wear diapers

It doesn't sound like you can rely on her for support. Probably no point in fighting that, just get your support from more supportive people.

 

[DLsecretlittle]

I'm trying to figure out how to Express my thoughts on this. Anyway it bothers me deeply that people say that only a few groups are allowed to wear diapers. But how dare someone like an older child wear diapers for bedwetting or a disability like Autism. Or an adult that has Chrones or some other kind of disease that either causes incontinence issues, or just too weak to get to the toilet in time.
I really despise when parents treat their kids like babies just because he or she is a bedwetter and has to wear diapers.

In my mind, I dis-associate babies and diapers, even if they do wear them. Becausexanyohe that needs them should be able to wear them, and its
nobody else's business why.

I also dis-associate the pairing of babies and diapers, which is odd because I usually connect a lot of dots/can find similarities and connections between things people usually wouldn’t connect.

I’m not saying everyone here is neurotic atypical (I mean honestly is anyone neuro “typical”, but it seems like most people think in a certain way that both separates things that are extremely common and pairs stuff that has no relation. I don’t know how other to describe it than discrete thinking.i know a lot of us DLs have sensory things, but I wonder if those with sensory issues are more likely to think less categorically.

 

[BabyTyrant]

Like multiple people have said, it goes back to the Potty Training approach of "only Babies wear Diapers" and barring that it is seen as something a "normal" Healthy adult does not need

It is especially Taboo that we love to wear and use Diapers and "baby" items like Bottles, Pacifiers, etc.

Most mature people don't seem to have a problem with people having a Medical Need (incontinence or something that causes Incontinence or what have you) ; but almost everyone in the general public has an issue with understanding why anybody would ever choose to wear and use Diapers for fun though

 

[winterheart01]

It doesn't sound like you can rely on her for support. Probably no point in fighting that, just get your support from more supportive people.

I never wanted support from her, just to leave me alone about it, but she continues to harass me and humiliate me.

 

[BabyTyrant]

I never wanted support from her, just to leave me alone about it, but she continues to harass me and humiliate me.

I am in almost the same boat, except I cant really say my Mom harasses me over it and she has got past the part of trying Humiliation (I think it helps a lot in my case that I pay money towards the bills and we are either going to succeed together or fail together) so I have a pretty good idea of how you feel and I know it suck; I really feel bad for you

I do everything in my power to wear and use at my discretion and I cover up when i do wear and use; but still Diapers get brought up a lot by her for no reason

 

[winterheart01]

I am in almost the same boat, except I cant really say my Mom harasses me over it and she has got past the part of trying Humiliation (I think it helps a lot in my case that I pay money towards the bills and we are either going to succeed together or fail together) so I have a pretty good idea of how you feel and I know it suck; I really feel bad for you

I do everything in my power to wear and use at my discretion and I cover up when i do wear and use; but still Diapers get brought up a lot by her for no reason

aww i know the feeling. Bills I pay most as it's my house after all, she only pays 1/3 of the bills that were originally on her name.
I gently try to nudge her towards getting used to it but she still sees me as a weirdo.
I too am discrete but she pats me to find out if I wear one or not and searches my stuff sometimes.....(privacy violated, locked chests d not help, she demands them to be opened)
yes she's an over obsessed control freak :s
the latest scold I got was "Why don't you get your diapers delivered to your doorstep???? that way everyone can see!" (which is a stpid argument since they're packed discreetly....

 

[BabyTyrant]

aww i know the feeling. Bills I pay most as it's my house after all, she only pays 1/3 of the bills that were originally on her name.
I gently try to nudge her towards getting used to it but she still sees me as a weirdo.
I too am discrete but she pats me to find out if I wear one or not and searches my stuff sometimes.....(privacy violated, locked chests d not help, she demands them to be opened)
yes she's an over obsessed control freak :s
the latest scold I got was "Why don't you get your diapers delivered to your doorstep???? that way everyone can see!" (which is a stpid argument since they're packed discreetly....

My mom has never patted me down to see if I am wearing a diaper or went through my stuff

But she has asked me several times at random if I was (at the time) wearing a diaper and sometimes asked me "why are you walking funny" because sometimes I will be wearing a more than slightly wet diaper and dont feel like changing to a fresh one if the one I am wearing is only moderately wet, I only buy really good ABDL diapers; so I dont wanna just barely use a diaper when I do decide to diaper up.

She also feels like making it awkward when I get Diapers delivered to the house; so I try to order when I know (with almost a 100% guarantee) its gonna get delivered on Saturday

 

[winterheart01]

My mom has never patted me down to see if I am wearing a diaper or went through my stuff

But she has asked me several times at random if I was (at the time) wearing a diaper and sometimes asked me "why are you walking funny" because sometimes I will be wearing a more than slightly wet diaper and dont feel like changing to a fresh one if the one I am wearing is only moderately wet, I only buy really good ABDL diapers; so I dont wanna just barely use a diaper when I do decide to diaper up.

She also feels like making it awkward when I get Diapers delivered to the house; so I try to order when I know (with almost a 100% guarantee) its gonna get delivered on Saturday

Ob yeah i get those comments too , after i have had a TURP or Botox in the sphincter i wear 24/7 the first week, she's constantly giving remarks i should hold it, that she can hear me crinkle (she has very good hearing due to impaired vision and inside our house there's little background noise) , she's worried people at work will notice etc...
She barged in while i was changing and when asked to grant me some privacy she gets mad that she seen me like that plenty when little.

Otherwise i didn't wear in house with normal clothing but i have to now

 

[BabyTyrant]

Ob yeah i get those comments too , after i have had a TURP or Botox in the sphincter i wear 24/7 the first week, she's constantly giving remarks i should hold it, that she can hear me crinkle (she has very good hearing due to impaired vision and inside our house there's little background noise) , she's worried people at work will notice etc...
She barged in while i was changing and when asked to grant me some privacy she gets mad that she seen me like that plenty when little.

Otherwise i didn't wear in house with normal clothing but i have to now

I'm sure my mom has probably heard crinkling before, or at the very least when I was putting a diaper on or taking one off (as the noise generated from thick plastic backed diapers at those times can be quite loud) but she has never mentioned it.

She has also expressed concerns about finding a partner that would accept me wearing Diapers; but honestly I dont even bother dating for other reasons.

In my case eventually she seemed to accept it a lot more than she used to; idk if that's the case with yours

I get having demands on someone that is being a complete Freeloader; but when you pay a significant amount of money towards bills or if it's your house I dont see why you should be able to wear and use Diapers, especially if they help you in some way (as in my case I dont have a physical need, but they help with my stress, anxiety, and Mental Health issues)

 

[dogboy]

When my mom discovered my makeshift diapers and gay porn, she would leave pamphlets in my bedroom entitled, What It Means to be a Man, etc. That was fun. I kept looking for a deep hole to jump into and disappear.

 

[PCBaby]

once potty training begins we are taught that only babies need or wear nappies and that anything that comes out of our bodies is "dirty" or "disgusting", this indoctrination goes on until we are both dry and clean day and night and usually for some time after. Wetting or soiling yourself after this time is considered "naughty" and wrong. Of course there are some of us who because of medical or other problems have to wear nappies, but even that is somehow seen as shameful. unfortunately a lot of people don't understand the ab/dl lifestyle and think it has to do with children rather than wanting to be a child again and as such society tends to react quite badly to us. I don't this is going to change soon, I'm not sure what the law is regarding wearing nothing but a nappy and a top in public but it would certainly cause a fuss and you find yourself in front of a psychologist or psychiatrist if you were to try.

 

[CookieMonstah]

I think over the years there's been a shift away from saying "nappies are for babies" or that it's "dirty" to just simply saying, "we don't wee/poo in our pants anymore". Also nowadays when you see children as old as 4 in nappies, children realise they're not just for babies.

 

[winterheart01]

once potty training begins we are taught that only babies need or wear nappies and that anything that comes out of our bodies is "dirty" or "disgusting", this indoctrination goes on until we are both dry and clean day and night and usually for some time after. Wetting or soiling yourself after this time is considered "naughty" and wrong. Of course there are some of us who because of medical or other problems have to wear nappies, but even that is somehow seen as shameful. unfortunately a lot of people don't understand the ab/dl lifestyle and think it has to do with children rather than wanting to be a child again and as such society tends to react quite badly to us. I don't this is going to change soon, I'm not sure what the law is regarding wearing nothing but a nappy and a top in public but it would certainly cause a fuss and you find yourself in front of a psychologist or psychiatrist if you were to try.

Actually, some time a collegue of mine expressed his disgust for people with a disability needing to wear diapers, he said "I don't ever want a child that has to wear a stinky diaper all his life", now I understand as a parent you want your children to be healthy, but the way he said it really made it obvious he doesn't like such people at all, he considers them "inferior" just because of the disability.
It kept echoing in my mind for a few days though, made me realise (along with other things that happened between us) that I don't want have too many chats with this person anymore, I'm sure he's already talking bad things behind my back too (I have witnesses)

But yes, I find it sad that this indoctrination can lead people to be so narrow minded.